Support with bullying *replies could be triggering*

[((deleted))]

Hi guys, having read the thread in forum and community questions about splitting the forum, i have decided to start a thread to support people who have been bullied or know someone who is being bullied.

Please note: if you wish to post for help about being sexually abused, please post in another thread or start a new thread

this is because individuals can feel intimidated by posts about sexual abuse.

So, go for it guys, post away. I will keep checking on this thread when i am on to reply to people.

I am only a PM away if you need to talk and feel unable or unwilling to post on this thread or in this forum

Love to you all!!!!

[Popple]

Bless you sweetie =]
I think tis a good idea
And if anyone ever needs to chat feel free to pm me =]

oh and points to sig >>vv


much love
katy
xx

[((deleted))]

I think, perhaps, the most common advice that people (esp teachers) give to people who are being bullied is 'ignore them'.

I know how hard that is. I really do. It hurts (and if you're anything like me) you want to stand up to them.

But there are times when it is the best policy to ignore the bullies, because (with any luck) they will get bored of tormenting you.

If that doesn't happen then it's time to try something else.

[[Purple_Rain]]

*quietly sneaks into thread*

i found that if ignoreing them didnt work, if you are really out-of-your-way nice to them...they stop (someitmes) which makes no sense. maybe they do actually have concionses (sp)

im dreading goign back to school.

[((deleted))]

*hugs Liz* I know how you feel. I used to get bullied as well. tee hee. Being really nice to bullies is fun cos it confuses them!!!

Todays tip for surviving bullying and for survivors:

Often, being bullied really reduces our self-esteem. We come to believe the nasty things that people tell us. We start to tell ourselves those things.

well, no more

whenever someone says something nasty to you (i.e. you're stupid) think no i'm not[...] (i.e. no i'm not stupid).

also, everyday, make a point of saying nice things about yourself to the mirror (it's not as crazy as it sounds).

*hugs everyone*

Liz, PM me if you like, i might not pick it up for a day, but i will always reply.

Ruthie

[Popple]

hehe I talk to myself in the mirror
I am so not weird..its part of this cbt thing

yus although if your me they didnt get bored
they didnt stop
i tried everything well I did have what 7 years so I had alot of time to try these things
and they never stopped not even when questioned by police
after I lay in hospital scared for my life at the tender age of 7
>.<

I shall shut up now.
but yes liz if you want to talk I'm always here =]
*cuddles tight*
hope it wasnt too bad

[here-for-the-journey]

*holds Kat tightly in my arms*
Poor angel.

[[Purple_Rain]]

first day back was fine, though im not goign in today.

how is everyone?

[Popple]

*cuddles* you gonna try go in another day this week though hun?
I'm ermm..ok.

how are you sweetie

[((deleted))]

Hey Liz. I know how hard it is to go into school when you are being bullied babe (trust me, i've been there). Can you talk to the teachers to make sure you are sent work when you are not in so that you don't fall behind?

Yeah, they don't always get bored if they don't get a reaction, but sometimes....

Kat, angel, you are so special, i really think that. You are a wonderful person. You can be free of all the self-doubt those people left you with.

[((deleted))]

Hey guys. I'm bumping this thread back up.....hope you are all okay.

Remember you are better than them.

[[Purple_Rain]]

i jsu tcopy up from everyone else. i wne tin the res tof the week. i jsut dont like goign in when i have a certain lesson (i only get it once a week) cos the teacher makes me feel like ****....though i only sjtu realised thats why i hate her lessons.

[purplestardust2]

I know how crap it is to be bullied I had ten years of it at school, and it still affects me now, but now I wish I hadn`t let it get to me as much as it did, although that`s easier said than done. I have learnt that bullies are generally the most insecure people in the world and it`s the only way to make them feel better about themselves, not that it`s an excuse. I just ignored them as much as possible and stayed out of their way, but part of me now wishes I`d stood up to them.

[((deleted))]

Yeah, i know what you mean. My therapist worries that i have too much empathy with the people who bullied me....meh...i prefer to feel sorry for them than to hate them.

Forgiving someone is not excusing what they did, or forgetting it, but setting yourself free from the task of hating them.

[[Purple_Rain]]

people seem suprised when i say i forgave my bullied. well, 2 of them out f god knwos how many. but they both (seperatly, and independantly of teachers) wrote me letters apologiseing. so i forgave them. and i now get the filthiest looks ever of one of the teacher who 'delt' with it after the teahcer ound out, when she see us together. we have a bit in comman, well, me and one of them. she self harms and had bulimic tendancies, and basically was f*cked up, so took it out on me. it doesn texcuse her, btu whats the point in wasteign energy in bareing grudges? these two were the thrid worst. my dad > year 9 > them in year 10, but they are the only ones to apologise. though i do wish they woudltn go out fo there way to talk to me, its triggering.

i havent forgiven the ones who havent apologised. they showed no remorse fro scareing me mentally and physically. even if they did apologise now, three years later, i dont knwo if i could.

[((deleted))]

*hugs liz closely*

[risenfromperdition]

*cuddles liz*
i really like that mirror idea

Wanders in.... is it alright if i join this thread....

[[Purple_Rain]]

course it is!

*lays out welcome mat*

hwo are you?

i'm not too great atm
bit iffy due to things but hey

Bullies pushed me out of being in full time education, i'm now in part time and i quite like it that way but hey i still sometimes get chairs tables pushed into me... Called names sweets crisps and wrappers thrown at me and being ignored is the worst thing ( i don't have any friends in school) I used to have 4/5 until my SH came in and this girl giovanna nestled in and she pushed me out.
Today on bus one girl ut of those 4/5 had to force herself to talk to me!!!!

sorry