Heya,
Thanks. Been having a really rough time recently. It started a few weeks ago with a really bad therapy session. I thought I was ok till today. I didnt even realise I felt better because I felt numb. I went to my gp today with a really tight chest. I wasn't panicking. In fact I was surprisingly calm. But it turned out that I was that tense physically (without realising it) that I was restricting my own breathing. Not good! Ever since, I just feel like everything is spiraling out of control. I'm having a war between my heart and my head. I know where it will go if I self harm. Its a guarantee that if I do it, it will escalate, I will end up back in hospital.
Its sounds childish, but I've been playing things down to everyone. Mainly to convince myself I was OK than anything else. I'm scared.