Triggering (Suicide) - Suicidel thoughts back after 5 months
I was last in hospital for an major overdose 5 months ago, last night the overwhelming desire came back and today I want to restock as I really don't want to be left feeling like this. I cannot see that there is going to be anything worth surviving for now.
"I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same too so we are not that different you and I.
You'll be surprised to know how far you can go from the point where you thought it was the end.
I'm sorry you are having such intense thoughts at the moment. Try not to re-stock, it will only make the temptation more intense and harder to resist.
Things can better, suicide is not the answer. Is there anybody you can get some extra support from at the moment?
I've spoken to my GP and she has arranged for me to see the psychiatrist I've seen a few times before, although I have not found this shrink all that useful in the past. The psychitrist has said that sectioning is not out of the question but I don't see forced hospitalisation as constructive, I'm not good with other people and this would not help my cause if I refused to eat or communicate with the other inmates; I have social anxiety problems.
"I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same too so we are not that different you and I.
You'll be surprised to know how far you can go from the point where you thought it was the end.
I hope the psychiatrist can help somehow, remember there are always people who care about you, I know that might not seem like much right now but none of us want to lose you so please keep fighting. xx
hey sweetheart, keep trying all the help that is available: if the psych you're seeing isn't suitable, ask to be referred to another one - it's not uncommon to swap counsellors or psychiatrists, some people just don't click as well as others.
it might help to think about what has made you feel low again? or it might not... don't do it if it'll make you feel worse! but try and think of it constructively, eg. i feel worse because i saw that person today and they belittle me and make me feel weak. if i avoid that person, i avoid these feelings.
if it's something about self image or eating disorder or maybe the anxiety disorder etc, these things can also be addressed and you may find websites or books to help with that - look it up on google or buy a book from amazon.
there are loads of books dealing with mental illness, it may help to read about it and learn more about the problem and coping strategies for it.
anyway, you can make it through - try and stay positive and make sure you see the psych/doctor etc.
sweetsunday gave some good advice there. I don't know if this will help you or not cos I don't know your situation, but I found myself in the same position last week cos I was in a bad situation which luckily I was able to get out of and now I'm ok again. Obviously I don't know what has you feeling low, but I just wanted you to know that things can get better and you can feel better again. Talk to the psych, see what they have to offer, just don't give up yet, you'd be missed.
