Contains sexual abuse - Why is it so hard to tell?

[The BiPolar Bear]

Ive been doing okay about talking with my therapist and Ive been trying real hard to not hurt myself anymore so that they dont make me go back to the hospital, but maybe that would be a good thing now? I dont wanna go to the hospital for hurting myself cause I dont like it there but if I do go then maybe they would see and know that hes hurting me and he would stop for good? I cant figure out what to do. I have been talking some to my therapist but still not about him, only about my feelings and stuff but I know shes nice and I kind of trust her now and I kind of really wanna tell her so that he'll stop hurting me but at the same time I dont want anyone to know what hes doing I just want him to stop and go away. I don't want anyone to know what he did to me but I have to tell for him to go away, right? So how do I tell someone? How do I make it all go away?

[PassedExpectations]

well, the likelihood that he will stop on his own is low. so you've really got to tell someone, and it sounds like your therapist would be the person to tell. you need to gather up the courage and do it *hugs* perhaps it would be easier to write her a letter to tell her what he is doing...

[The BiPolar Bear]

I have written about it in my notebook about it but nowbodys read it before. If I do let my therapist read it though, does that mean that I'll have to talk to the cops, or can he just go away without other people knowing?

[Horizon]

If you are currently being harmed, your therapist has a responsibility to alert the authorities. Then yes, you would talk to them.

[The BiPolar Bear]

Is there any way of getting out of talking to them? I mean I've thought about this a lot and I've gotten to the point where I can deal with my therapist knowing but I don't want anyone else to know and I don't know if I could talk about it. I mean even if I do tell my therapist it wont me talking to her, it'll be me showing her my notebook that I write stuff down in. I just don't know what to do but I want it all to stop.

[Horizon]

Well if you want something to come of it, you're going to have to talk to them.

[whirlpools]

It's scary and horrible the first time you have to tell, with all sorts of worries involved. But by telling your therapist, you won't be on your own with it anymore and she'll be able to help you report him. You don't deserve to go through abuse and it's not your fault, and nothing to feel guilty or ashamed about. He's the one in the wrong.

I can really empathise with how scary and uncertain it feels to report your abuser for the first time, but I can assure you it's so worth it, just to make it stop and have someone to talk to.

Can you say what worries you about people knowing what he's doing?

[NoAngel]

I've never reported mine either... Considered writing a story in 3rd person eg. "there was once a girl who...". Have you thought of that approach?

[The BiPolar Bear]

I don't want people to know cause I don't want anyone to know what he did to me. It's not right and its embarassing.

[NoAngel]

I understand. I dont want anyone to know either. *big hugs* If there is someone hurting you currently or putting someone else at risk you should try and tell though.

Thinking of you x

[xXLost_and_BrokenXx]

You can do this you are strong enough. I know you are. Its good you trust your therapist, I do think having it written down will make it easier to tell her. I know its scarey the thought of other people knowing but NO ONE will judge you because what happened to you is not your fault and they will just want to help you and protect you from him.

[The BiPolar Bear]

I tried to tell her today. I even brought in my notebook to try to give her so she could read but I couldn't. I'm a freaking coward and I know it but I can't just go spouting off about what he does to me it's not right!