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View Poll Results: Have you been the subject of negative comments?
Yes 37 71.15%
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I personally havent but I have seen other people make negative comments to others 6 11.54%
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Old 17-10-2014, 08:40 PM   #1
not_so_insig
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For those of you who have a disability

Have you experienced any sort of form of bad comments/discrimination?

I ask because on my thread in gsa about having a radar key, I expressed that I had that I experienced some negative comments because I sit sometimes in the disabled (also marked priority) seats on the bus and also I have a bus pass due to my disability.

Oly also commented she had some negative comments whilst using her freedom pass.

BTW I am counting anyone who receives DLA/PIP and/or receives a bus pass/freedom pass because of a disability as disabled, not necessary someone who has a wheelchair for the sakes of the poll.



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Old 17-10-2014, 08:49 PM   #2
Cacoethes
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I once had a comment from a bus driver when I used my bus pass, he said 'You don't look disabled'. I just said 'thank you' and walked to my seat.

Other than that, not really. I've had dirty looks and mumbles from elderly people on buses, but I can just imagine them being like 'I've waited 60 years for this bus pass, she hasn't even earned it'.
Which is totally ridiculous but that's what I like to imagine.

Oh, I did once ask a group of youths on the train to stop making sudden loud noises (they were drunk and being silly) because I'd just got out of hospital and was scared about having another seizure, they moaned about it and were like 'loud noises can't trigger seizures' accused me of lying or whatever. Just ignorance really, but they shut up when I told them about the time I had a seizure on the train and it was delayed for 40 minutes and then cancelled. They quietened down after that.

So not really anything discriminatory I suppose, just ignorance. I don't let it bother me, let them think what they want, I'm probably never going to see them again.



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Old 17-10-2014, 09:04 PM   #3
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I know my partner has an issue as he had a rader key as well and had to use the disabled bathroom and when i was waiting for him a women in a wheelchair was waiting to get in and had an awful go at him as it was for "disabled people". Had to say to the women not all disabilities are physical and can be seen and to not be ignorant and judgemental. He was really upset after that tho!

But it terms of me i know people got jealous because i got the disabled student allowance at uni so they paid for equipment for me to use, but yip i would happily swap my mental illness to be sane.





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Old 17-10-2014, 11:06 PM   #4
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Yes, all the time.

Been a subject of comments such as im not allowed to spend my money on things i like cause they are practically paying for me, shouldnt have a tv or a hobby and so on cause its their money i am spending. Also been told i shouldnt ever get children and so on because i get pension.

But like bleeding angel, id swap any day to not struggle as i do and be able to geta job or education. Unfortunately thats unlikely to ever happen hence why i was given retirement at the age of 23 which isnt something you just get and was a several years long fight with many hospitalisations to get it and a ton of evaluations and job testing, school and so on.

I am early retired for my mental and also to a degree physical disabilities. Mostly mental though but my physical has become more prominent since i got my pension. Ive had comments for sitting in disabled seats in the bus because i was young even though i could barely walk at the time.

Comments like these hurts me a lot. I didnt choose my situation and i never would have. This wasnt my dream and i wish i could do the things other people my age does. I had an entirely different future planned for me and i dont think people understand how hard accepting that that will never happen is and how left out you feel when not working and getting an education and traveling and all that stuff, other young people do. Ive had to sacrifice a lot due to illness but its easier to just be rude and feel cheated because i get money and they dont. (Though people under education over 18 get money from the state to get by as well and people gladly take that. Yet i shouldnt get pension even though i desperately needed it because they pay. I pay taxes too so technically i also pay for their education etc. But yeah)

My nurse told me that having the illnesses i have is a full time job. One that i can never get off from and i get paid to get the best life possible and be able to work on myself and getting better.

Tbh ive gotten a lot of those negative comments from people on this site as well. somehow its okay to get benefits which half of this site does because of their illness but its not okay for me to get pension even when ive been evaluaded by 6 different doctors who all say i wont be able to work. And that i needed it. It also was a hell of a fight to get it and what i had to go through to get it sent me into long term hospital stays time after time and made me a lot more ill.

But yeah, ive probably experienced this from other mentally ill people more than non ill people. Because if they can work and get education while ill, i should be able to too. It seems like the general opinion that if they can or know someone who can with the same diagnosis or diagnoses, i should be able to do so too. However unfortunately thats not how it works and being treatment resistant doesnt make it easy and having multiple diagnoses. Both mental and physical and in and out of hospital. Often long term stays.

Plus its a lot more expensive for the state to have me go into hospital all the time. Getting pension has given me peace and quiet to focus on me and my treatment rather than being sent to work or school which i cant handle and then i get break down and psychosis. Ive had far fewer hospital admissions since getting my retirement and havent been in hospital for mental reasons for a year. And atm i get treatment for varies illnesses every day besides weekend so i dont see how i should be able to fit in work or school.

Doesnt keep people from making nasty comments, judging and being unpleasant though.



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Old 20-10-2014, 08:31 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cacoethes View Post
I once had a comment from a bus driver when I used my bus pass, he said 'You don't look disabled'. I just said 'thank you' and walked to my seat.

This is a perfect response.

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Old 20-10-2014, 10:11 PM   #6
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Just wanted to point out that having a visible disability isn't necessarily any easier. Too many examples to point out right now but I've had someone literally walk backwards in front of me he could stare at me. He fell over a bin!



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Old 20-10-2014, 10:53 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bear View Post
Just wanted to point out that having a visible disability isn't necessarily any easier. Too many examples to point out right now but I've had someone literally walk backwards in front of me he could stare at me. He fell over a bin!
Can only say he deserved that. He should have landed IN it ;)



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Old 21-10-2014, 04:33 PM   #8
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Lol bear.

I used my radar key today. I got a nasty comment from someone who said "those toilets are for disabled people you know". This is despite the toilet being locked and the toilet being only opened to people with a radar key. I said "I have a disability it's just hidden". That shut them up because they didn't have an answer and I think they were jealous I didn't queue.

Then today I got a dirty look because I was sitting in the disabled seat on the bus. I ignored yhem. Someone came on in a wheelchair and I wasn't sitting in the disabled bay I didn't stop her from using the space.

Having a hidden disability sucks. Some people are so ignorant.



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Old 22-10-2014, 09:40 AM   #9
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I have had many negative experiences.

I have an abnormal gait due to mild ataxia. I was not long ago called a "f***ing spastic" by some youths. A few weeks before that I was laughed at by some other youths in the same recreation ground. Now I cannot go to that recreation ground alone when there could be youths there (school holidays, after school etc).

As mentioned above, I've had negative comments regarding my Freedom Pass.

At university, I've been a negative focus on attention when I'm having a meltdown and my support worker is trying to calm me down. It's bad enough having a meltdown, but having people stop and stare makes it worse.

My uni tutor does not "get" autism. He said "you need to stop relying on your support worker and be independent" to me last academic year. He also hates it when I get an allowance like a library extension.

My dad keeps testing my autism; I have no idea why. He doesn't live with me (he lives abroad) but when he does visit here he upsets me at times. He puts loads of aftershave on and walks around the house, leaving a trail behind himself and then tells me off when I get agitated with the smell and start opening all the windows. He also refuses to keep to a routine and changes his mind about what he's doing very often (for example he was driving me home whwen suddenly he turned round the corner and said "let's go to Homebase!" without giving me any prior warning). Then he yells at me for having a meltdown. My dad is close to me but he doesn't get my autism at all.

I live in daily fear of the neighbours trying to converse with me, of people physically contacting me, of unexpected noise etc... and then when I do get exposed with that and I start exhibiting challenging behaviour, I get punished for it by people that don't understand.

I wish the general public were better educated about disabilities. When I am screaming and thrashing about in public, I don't want to end up with the police, I just want people to understand that I'm set off by a stimulus of some sort and I just need to go somewhere quiet.

I am really thankful to my support workers because when I go out with them, I feel safer and protected. They say to me that they'll not let anyone mess me about. I call them my "bodyguards" lol.


Last edited by Steel Maiden : 22-10-2014 at 09:44 AM. Reason: additional


PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10 or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.

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Old 07-11-2014, 06:49 PM   #10
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I have personally had several nasty comments from people because I'm on DLA. (For some reason mine hasn't changed to PIP yet)
I had a girl on Facebook who used to be my friend have a go at me over it. As a few people have said above, my disabilities rarely show themselves physically. I'm counted as disabled and get DLA mainly due to my very bad mental health, but also because I suffer from Sciatica. My Sciatica is the only disability I have that can actually been seen.
But this girl on Facebook started having a go at me for 'living on taxpayers money' She said that depression wasn't a good enough reason not to work, and that she suffers from depression and she works. I simply said that she was lucky that her depression didn't effect her working, as I would love to be able to get a job. It's terribly boring not to be able to.
I have also had a very bad day with my Sciatica before, and sat on a disabled seat on the bus, so I could straighten my leg out a bit. I had quite a few people glaring at me for it, even though when I came on the bus I was walking with quite a strong limp (I try not to use a crutch or cane to help me walk as my carer says it won't really help in the long run)
I really do wish people would be more understanding.



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Old 07-11-2014, 10:15 PM   #11
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I have a visual impairment (partially sighted) and have had to put up with a lot of ignorance and stupidity from people over the years I have to hold things close to me sometimes to read them and some smart arse will say "could you be holding that any closer" to which I reply "would you take the piss out of someone in a wheelchair?" which tends to shut them up.

I've had to deal with things like when asking someone in a train station which platform to go to they bluntly reply "it tells you up on the board" I've had that from train station staff ¬_¬

those are just a couple of examples anyway.

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Old 15-11-2014, 03:39 PM   #12
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My whole life for the most part, yes I've gotten looks and comments and attitudes from alot of people, especially while I was in school. I'm not wheelchair bound or have a severe disability, I'm just deaf in one ear and I have deformaties in my face that I try to hide as much as I can for above stated reasons. I'm kind of just used to the looks and comments now, I've been dealing with it for over 20 years so I think I've become numb to it by now though it still hurts a bit at times I suppose






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Old 11-12-2014, 09:40 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by insignificant_one View Post
Have you experienced any sort of form of bad comments/discrimination?
I'm regisered as disabled and unfit for work. My mental health has disabled me in a "complex needs" sort of way (translation: incredibly difficult to accurately ascertain what my actual needs are) and thus, I shall answer, ...

Yup, sure have. It's so, so easy for people to see what might look like a perfectly normal man, only to think he's just that: normal.

I'd go into more detail, but I'm very anonymous here and so have to be careful what I say.



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Old 12-12-2014, 04:02 AM   #14
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I have aspergers syndrome, ADHD and major depression. When I was in school many people made comments about my autism. I was called an autistic c-word and someone said to me, 'don't get autistic about it' making it seem like having autistic behavioral traits was a negative thing. More recently, (actually this year), I was diagnosed with depression and my mum and dad don't understand the disorder at all, calling me 'lazy' and threatening me with putting me in hospital. Which would be fine if I was at immediate risk, but I'm not.

Lack of knowledge and ignorance is no excuse for being an arse. :/

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Old 19-12-2014, 06:09 AM   #15
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When I was in my first two years of High School I got a lot of nasty comments about my weight, or well, lack thereof. I've had diet and nutrition issues for longer than I can remember (truly) and was once called an "anorexic freak" which wasn't very nice.

Aside from that, the most discrimination I've received has been from people whom I thought were friends. Turns out they're just as ignorant as those who make the "anorexic freak" type comments, just on a different level.

But in retrospect, it's more constructive to be without them, for people with those points of view aren't going to be helping me become a better person any time soon.

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Old 19-12-2014, 11:10 AM   #16
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I'm lucky in the sense that although I have a lot of what are defined as disabling conditions they are not severe enough for me to need support. That of course may change in the future but for now it doesn't affect me.

Anyway, I received DSA at uni and had to use a computer and extra time in exams which did cause a few comments, until I explained I have anxiety issues and wrist issues that Mean I can't write for long periods of time, once I explained that people were understanding.

I also have IBD so have a radar key. I've used it twice in my life and both times had verbal abuse. I have a 'can't wait card' that I showed the people who were having a go at me and that shut them up.

I think people forget that not all disabilities are visable, very much 'out of sight, out of mind' mentality.

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Old 19-12-2014, 05:49 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iamcatbug View Post
I also have IBD so have a radar key. I've used it twice in my life and both times had verbal abuse. I have a 'can't wait card' that I showed the people who were having a go at me and that shut them up.

I think people forget that not all disabilities are visable, very much 'out of sight, out of mind' mentality.
I have the just cant wait card too, and it is great. Fortunately I have yet to show it been as I havent used my radar key lately, but it is great to have it around.

My council is thinking of charging 20p to use the public loos. I hope they dont because the amount of times I use the loo I will be broke. That's another tax on the disabled. I dread to think what would happen if I had to queue to pay and there was a long queue.



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Old 19-12-2014, 08:23 PM   #18
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^^ from what I understand, disabled toilets are still free even if they charge for the others. I've not used disabled toilets at places that normal ones charge.

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Old 19-12-2014, 09:31 PM   #19
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Quote:
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^^ from what I understand, disabled toilets are still free even if they charge for the others. I've not used disabled toilets at places that normal ones charge.
That is good. I did suggest on a facebook group where they were running that story that disabled toilets should be free. But still I prefer to use the non disabled loos when I am able.

One of the toilets that the council are thinking of charging for (once they are done up) has the chain above your head, I like those kind of loos, so I hope that they dont get rid of them. The same block has spacious loos, I hope they wont make them impossibly small - I need a fairly decent sized loo so that partially why I got the radar key.



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"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
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Old 19-12-2014, 09:57 PM   #20
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Where do you get an I cant wait card from?

I think I will get a radar key too.



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