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both me and my husband have decided to throw our blades out ...In Islam its forbidden to self injure and this is the reason why am throwing out the blades
My husband will put them in the bin once the bin needs emptied
She seems dressed in all the rings
of past fatalities
So fragile yet so devious
She continues to see
Jodieeee- <3 Super proud of you for doing the washing up and making and eating chilli! It was most delicious! I shall repay you with top-quality spaghetti bolognaise tomorrow night =D
Aamanee- well done for throwing out the bladed, that's fantastic!
Carmen, I'm sorry to hear your therapist was useless, but well done for not losing faith and trying to speak to a different one.
Conor- Well done for going into college :) Last day? Does that mean it's completely over for the year?
Kat-Congratulations on getting yourself to gym class and to the doctors; was gym class fun?
Well, it looks like I'm not going to be getting therapy anytime soon. They told me that if I want to try to see my old therapist when she gets back from maternity leave in maybe 3 months (she hasn't left yet) that I could try that, but they are unwilling to assign me anyone else as (I quote the supervisor) 'quite frankly I don't see a difference between hurting yourself and a suicide attempt either. Most people come into therapy knowing what they want to change and how to change it. We just facilitate that.'
Right. She's and her supervisor are the only 2 mental health people I've EVER seen that don't understand a difference between self harm and attempting suicide. If I knew what I wanted and how to do it, I wouldn't need therapy!!! Arrrgh.
So my somewhat maybe possibly heroic plan is to talk to my roommates and tell them that I want things to change and could they possibly help me figure out how as therapy doesn't seem to be an option. I cannot and do not want to suffer through at least 3 more months of this crap.
(sorry, I really should start my own thread about this as it is really upsetting me and I would kind of like to get feedback on it)
the rage you feel will consume you and destroy you let this rage inside you die
one day you'll find the signs in every motion close your eyes so you might see
I will hold you still every second of every hour let your actions speak your will
raise your head up high so the heavens hear you cry
light the brightest fire from the highest mountain
so the whole world knows that
your spirit can't be broken
I let the ENT doctor in hospital put a camera up my nose (it wouldn't go down my throat as well due to my windpipe being so narrow) to find out the cause of my breathing difficulties, although i did have to be sedated a little but i did it.