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Old 31-03-2012, 03:17 AM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2012
The scars never fade

It has been about 5 years since I stopped cutting regularly, and about 5 months since my last slip (and let me tell you, that is not a proud moment for me) but as summer draws near (encouraging short sleeves) I find myself focusing more and more on my scars. The funny thing is I accidentally scratched myself right across several old scars and now I feel that my accidental injury is drawing old scars that I wish I could just forget into light. and with one incredibly large scar I feel so entirely self concious. Sometimes I consider getting laser scar removal to at least banish the most obvious of scars, but then I think that it is a reminder of how far I have come. What do you guys think? Should we accept our scars as reminders of our past or hide them and forget about our past?

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Old 31-03-2012, 05:39 AM   #2's Avatar
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theres the idea that scars should be kept because they are a reminder of the past, how far you've come and how strong u are.

Its honesty personal thou... everyone may say keep them and wear them with pride ( i dont and im not sure i can either) but u have to do whats right for u, whats comfortable for u. For me, ive been told that i would qualify to have scar reduction surgery done if i wanted to... im not sure if i would but i know that i still cant handle my own scarring and i struggle seeing others. I have a few friends who show their scars and i think its amazing they can do that but i know that for one of them it took a long time and for the other its about getting the attention. SO if u chose to show ur scars, it would be an idea to ask yourself some questions like.. why u wanna do it, how will u deal with people staring and asking questions, what would you say to a child who may ask (cos they do).

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Old 01-04-2012, 12:17 AM   #3
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I think it's whatever you feel comfortable with. I don't think there are any 'norms' with this.

For me, I know that skin grafting or laser treatment just isn't an option. So I guess it's something I haven't particularly considered.

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Old 03-04-2012, 12:21 AM   #4
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Most of my cuts are on my leg so I'm just extremely careful with the length of shorts. I've never considered treatment.

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Old 05-04-2012, 04:41 PM   #5
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embrace!! show them off! It is a sign of your strength. I say be proud <3
my scars are on my legs, and I always wear tights with shorts (as I am now) because I'm in highschool, but I never wear tights around friends and family.
You have every right to show off your beautiful body :)

"Monsters are real, ghosts are too. They live inside us and sometimes they win."

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Old 15-04-2012, 06:14 AM   #6
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I think it depends on how the scars make you feel. If it is a part of your life that you want to not have "reminders" of then maybe scar removal is an option to explore. If having scars also prevents you from engaging in activities that you otherwise enjoy- like swimming- or wearing certain clothes, then you at least can look at the options available to you. Like someone said- it may not be possible for some people because of their skin type/ severity/ location. So then you look at the options of clothing and make up.

I guess if you still SH aka slip up- I don't know if it is right to be too severe and just to use fading cremes for now and good hygiene practices to avoid infection etc.

I only have one severe scar and it did impact other people's perception- I got alot of questions asked because I didn't cover up. Now I accept that it is going to show- it has somewhat faded with time- and it is a part of me.

I think a visit to your doctor/ a dermatologist and/or utilising products recommended by them will be the best option.

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Old 06-06-2012, 01:57 AM   #7
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This is a really subjective topic, methinks :)

On one hand, I want to keep my scars, not so much because I want to show them off, but because they are my personal reminders that I am strong and have been a 'warrior' if you like. It is a great reminder of the courage and strength of character in me. Having said that, I'm not keen on showing them off and I'd rather keep them hidden (long sleeve tops and long trousers) but that's just me :) and because I would rather not have other people see them. I guess it depends on where you are ie the community and society you live in.

On the other hand, I think treatment is a good idea if you are willing to move on from that chapter of your life; if you are POSITIVE you are not going to relapse; if any reminder of your past is triggering and makes you feel bad or low, then by all means. However, if you do end up relapsing it would have been a waste of time and money.

It's really up to you, the people around you, the society you live in and what those scars mean to you.

What's most important here I think is that you don't, by showing off or being 'proud' of your scars, in any way shape or form, glorify self harm or your scars.

My best advice would be to really consider what the scars mean to you, maybe a cost-benefit analysis of what the consequences of treatment and/or exposure would be good :)

Whatever your decision, know you are fully supported and that if you need any help or have any questions, you are welcome to contact me!

Best of luck with it and let us know what conclusions you come to!


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Old 12-06-2012, 11:31 PM   #8
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I think as it's been stated, it really depends on the individual.

The large majority of my visible scars are very faded. And unless you get close, it just kinds of blends in to one big marred surface.

I don't really worry about them being seen. They are part of me. If I'm really worried about it, I just cover them up with some foundation, and that seems to work fine.

I haven't harmed regularly in years, and I've basically stopped doing it on my arms.

Well done on the achievement!!!

So your scars fade away/You soaked up the pain/A better person 'cause you lived through those days/And now you know what it's like to prove/You can overcome anything that gets to you/Well it's alright/We're sayin' our goodbyes/To the past and everything that ain't right/We won't waste another day/With all these silly things in our way-Crossfade

Light a candle for the sinners...Set the world on fire...

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Old 19-06-2012, 12:11 AM   #9
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This is a good question, what to do with those pesky reminders. I know when I finally decided I no longer wanted to hide all the time I still carried a jacket with me at all time "just in case" which eased some of that anxiety. I found there were certain times I started to feel self conscious and could put on a jacket or long sleeves and just get through that moment until I felt stronger later. I have been about 4 1/2 years without cutting so while my scars have fadded more than I ever thought they would they are still there and I know that some of them, the ugly raised kind, will always be there.
Rather than get rid of my scars through the laser therapy I decided to balance the physical reminder my scars give me of what I used to do with a new reminder of who I am and what I do now by getting a tattoo that symbolizes my journey. Sure I have the scars that reminded me of how I handled my negative thoughts and experiences in the past, but I also have a beautiful tattoo, that I "earned" after one year cut free, that reminds me of how far I have come.
If the scar therapy is as therapeutic to you as a sign of your progress, as my tattoo is to me then I say pursue it.

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A thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy but you are just flying past

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Old 25-06-2012, 06:54 PM   #10
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Personally I don't like showing my scars, but I don't want to get rid of them completely. Maybe putting henna on your scars may be something to consider. I have been doing it a lot lately and it helps me almost forget that they are there. In the end you have to do what is right for you, but I would hold off on any serious procedure until you are 100% sure.

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