one_step_closer, I am very proud of you for calling Breathing Space.
I think it can feel frustrating trying to cope with emotional suffering, but things like journaling may give you an outlet for coping. You state staying safe forever like that would be a bad thing- but in fact you are feeling a bit stronger in the moment, while at other times not so much.
I have lived with emotional pain for several decades now, and it often varies in terms of how well I can cope. At the moment, it is clear that being a survivor gives me insight and empathy that others would not have without walking in my shoes.
Similarly, part of the adventure is learning to advocate for yourself and valuing your presence in this world. It takes time. In the space of 1 week you have achieved alot. You don't have to feel as though the pain will last forever. You have the option of surviving because you don't know if the next moment will be one where you cope well- and possibly get some respite from pain. Trust me, it is worth holding on to find out.