Thank you for responding. I really appreciate it. I poured it all away sometime after that. I won't be drinking again, hopefully ever. I've spoken to a few people today, my ex in particular which helped. Felt sick and spent most the day shivering and shaking but she took me to see my kids and got me to eat something.
I harmed the past 6 nights in a row but I haven't today. I don't know if it's cos I feel so physically bad I don't feel like I need too tonight. Whatever the reason I guess it's as good as any other.