Matt, i can't say whether it will get better. I can't promise you that you will one day leave all the pain and hurt behind and never return to it. But the hope is there as long as you keep trying. As long as you keep going. Maybe it seems pointless but i hope you can find the strength inside to keep trying to make life better and more bearable for yourself. The way i see it, some people struggle through their entire lifetime but it's not the struggles and their hardship that define them but more their courage and strength because they kept trying. There is hope in just getting up to face another day.
Maybe you need something that is radically different that what the ordinary system of mental health can offer. Maybe you need to think about what makes life menaningful for you, what is important to you. It's so easy to think and feel we're not worth anything and then of course, our lives lose purpose and direction. But being lost doesn't make you a lost cause.
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