Thank you. I slept hard last night and it didnt help much. My body feels like its failing. And without wanting to sound dramatic I dont want to be 29 and stuck in a body that doesnt work until I die. It is so painful even breathing today. I walked to the coop and my knees gave way twice.
I have a meeting on essentially a zoom thing with the person Ive been having an assessment for a therapy service with. Havent had any contact with them or anyone else professional in about a month. Im dreading it. I dont think I can cope with someone saying Im doing well because Im still going and dismissing how bloody hard this is.
And I have an MRI later this week. And blood tests. And a phone call about it next week. And that all feels too much.
And work keeps pressurising me to do late nights above what Im contracted for. I said no repeatedly and now am being made to feel guilty about it by the head nurse. I signed a contract for 40 hours. I wouldnt have signed it if it'd been 42. Never mind that I work for free for at least 40 minutes every day. And I have a chronic health disease that she knows about. Grrr. Never mind the issue of my coursework or the fact she called me a bully.
I just feel like a pressure cooker.
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