I don't want to publicly put out what I've done, might send you a pm.
He can only vaguely remember things because he would have so much at a time; he's not an alcoholic, he kind of binge drinks. He probably thinks it was all a dream.
I'm just about 15, I was 10(?) the first time. I just know that if I didn't love, pity, and depend on him so much I could get him in jail for a good while, and that if I had been age and he knew he could have done the same.
I'm just trying to deal with the post-trauma of it. Do you know any methods? I thought talking about it fairly anonymously would be good, but I'm open to pretty much anything short of telling him.