I think I'm going to ask my tutor and teacher at university if I can get a longer time off. And a new essay extension. I don't want to miss anything but I don't feel like I should go back when I'm not even able to walk outside. My parents are suggesting that we go on a walk tomorrow but I'm scared I won't manage. I just had another really scary panic attack at 6pm that really felt like I was going to shut down. I felt extremely weak, I threw up my dinner again, this time even more, I was having hot and cold flushes, shaking and I was even wailing a bit. I must have looked pathetic in the moment.
I definitely need a psychologist. It's just a matter of getting an appointment and affordability. I am also scared I won't find someone kind and understanding. My first experience at the young person's place, the guy barely seemed interested and got half my information wrong!