[Sharkgirl]

I've been suffering from health anxiety since I had a virus earlier this month. I have recently moved to a new city and started uni. I think the stress of the move and my academic deadlines are responsible for panic attacks.

However, stress is a killer. I don't have any history with serious medical conditions or anything life threatening. I even went to my GP and got blood tests, heart and lung check, walking heel to toe etc and I'm perfectly healthy. I have beta blockers which help with some of the physical symptoms of the panic attacks but I have a nagging and frightening feeling in the back of my mind that I'm going to die any day. This has been going on for weeks.

I have OCD and Anxiety and am on a relatively high dose of sertraline and a medium dose of propranolol as per the doctor's recommendations. I'm worried that by worrying about dying I will bring it on. What if secretly I want to die? I know I don't but I don't know why I'm obsessing over it.

Symptoms of my anxiety include:
•hot flushes/blood rush to the ears
•feeling hot but having no temperature
•dizziness and nausea
•slightly increased heart rate
•shaking
•shallow breathing
•scary feeling that I'm going to faint or die even though I've been through the situation before.

They come at random and last anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour. I constantly ask for reassurance that I'm not dying during this time.

I'm at home for now. If and when I go back to uni I will talk to the councillor and get some support but for just now how do I stop obsessing over my own death? I keep worrying that because I feel weak and sick I'm going to die in my sleep. I worry that it will happen at any moment and the thought scares me.

What can I think about until I have my next doctor's appointment to check how my tablets are working?