Thank you both. My head feels heavy, full, painful, and tired. I just want to give up on life. I want to do something really self destructive and I'm sick of myself for not doing anything. I have no energy right now and I keep thinking about if I had to go to hospital and would then get less sleep and would feel awful. Such an excuse. I really want my self harming abilities to go back to how they used to be. When I was causing some good damage and when I was overdosing 1-3 times a month.
I went to Money Matters to get help filling in my PIP form today. The advisor basically just wrote 'no change' for all the questions. She said I might still be asked to go for an assessment but I really hope not. With the mobility question I was worried about she said it does reflect my difficulties it just isn't worded well for MH stuff so that was a relief.
I'm so tired of battling life but I know it can't get any better only worse. I know I keep saying that.
I'll need to try hard to make it to the gym group tomorrow.
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