The fire people were lovely and insisted I wasn't wasting their time, despite them going over stuff they had already told me about and then they basically just had a general chat with me and even checked how I'm doing MH wise. I of course didn't go into detail about stuff, I know that's not their job. They said they don't want me to fight any fires or climb out of upstairs windows because if I go into a room and close the door it will keep the fire out for 20 minutes and if I phone 999 right away the fire brigade can be there in about 6 minutes. That is reassuring. I said I had got a fire blanket in case something happens like there is a fire outside the living room door and the cats are in the living room then maybe I could use the fire blanket to put out the fire at the door and get the cats. They said what do I think would cause a fire at the living room door? I never actually thought about that. They said any fire would likely be in the kitchen but again reiterated that I am highly unlikely to have a house fire. They said they could arrange to take me to the fire station to look around and/or watch some training happening. I'm not sure about that. It was so hard not to get upset about wasting their time and I was doing stupid movements and saying stupid things. I am such a freak.
I am so tired of battling through life. Life is too painful. I don't want to do this, any part of life.