I am at my ropes end, I just can't take living here with my mom and her alcoholic boyfriend anymore. He is really disrespectful when he's drunk' which is basicly all the time. He'll turn the radio on full blast at 2-3 in the morning, make a complete mess of the house and yell all night. He usally cleans up his mess and the apologises to mom and tells her how ashamed he feels about how he acted. She buys it and lets him off without so much as a slap on the wrist. Then he goes ahead and does it again next week. If I did half the things he did, my mom would have kicked me out a long time ago but for him apparently its okay. They always promise us that he'll get help and my mom will go to Alanon meetings, we get told fairytales about going to family counselling in 2 weeks and getting things sorted out. 6 months later, none of it will have happened despite me bringing it up and reminding them nearly daily. He was supposed to move out on the weekend so he could sort out his alcoholism and he and my mom would go back to dating again. I was sooooo incredibly happy that my life would be free from all the drama and problems that come from him living with us. However, despite him sleeping on the couch for two weeks its become painfully obvious that it was just another fairytale seeing as he's moved back into my moms room instead of into a basement suite. I know that its not healthy for me to be living here much longer. I get so unbearably furious some nights that I can't stop shaking and I want to cut myself to shreds, its one of those nights but I tried hard not to cut and ended up on here instead. I can't really leave but I know I can't stay here if things stay the same, with him being and alcoholic and my mother being a classic example of an enabler. I don't make enough money to live on my own right now unless I quit school, so I was considering going to stay with my grandma. Unfortuneatley both options would mean I'd have to quit school in the end which would basicly leave me with a shitty life. I am really torn on what I should do, I can wait until either my job starts paying me a bit more or I finish school and can go to college in another city or I can move out now to my grandmas, quit my current job and my school then get a job there. I can either fight it out or run away and I really don't know what to do, I don't think I can take much more of it but on the other hand my life would be exponentially better int he future if I finish this schooling. I am really just stuck in a frustrating situation trying to make a hard decison. I would appreciate some support, maybe just someone to tell me that its going to be okay, but if not just writing this post has helped me to calm down a bit. Thanks if you even bothered to read through all of it, I know its abit long.
