A lot of that makes sense.
I guess the new job doesn't feel like a lot of pressure because I'm excited about it and really enjoy the training we're doing now.
But I don't feel so much like I have anything to say.
I've been kind of emotionally numb in a lot of ways for quite some time and then recently I've started to have the tiniest emotions--like they're muted or something.
Maybe that all has something to do with it.
It's just hard to convince myself that it's real enough to do something about when nothing has really happened yet--it's mostly in my head.
And I do have an appt with my counselor next Thursday....but it's the first time I'm meeting her. I had to switch because the one I was seeing couldn't see me anymore because I work during her hours. But I know I'm going to have a really hard time saying anything....because it doesn't feel real yet and because I don't know her at all.