Yes I was free for about 9 years and then went back to it, although I did have an event that sort of triggered it but it was a while after that I SI'd again.
13 years free is amazing. What helped you to stop last time? I think it's important that you seek help now before you get to that point of SI-ing and unravelling. Equally though the feelings may pass. They are thoughts that you don't have to act on. Do you have anyone you could maybe talk to about this?