I hate crumbling.
I just feel so sad. It’s like I try so dam hard to put things into place to prevent me getting low but I think that literally I have nothing. I hate how it feels that the one close friend I had I’ve lost. I see her on social media so happy and I feel alone. I really feel it lately and like she treated me really bad but that was fine until I said something.
I just feel so sad that I’m struggling with this time of year and it seems I always get low now and I want to be able to move on but I trapped with anniversaries. I feel as if I will never move on like I want to soooo badly.
My partner keeps cycling in his mood. Jumping from mania to dysthymia. I can’t support him and also put myself first. I can’t juggle this and I am crumbling and I feel I have no one to talk to anymore. I feel like I’m fighting a constant internal battle that I’m gradually losing. I want to self harm so much. I haven’t felt like this since this time last year I’m so angry I feel like this!
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