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one_step_closer · 27-04-2019, 06:02 PM

I want to bash myself to death.

I want to do myself some proper damage. I want to be violent towards myself. I cut but of course it was shit. I need to properly beat myself up. I hate myself! I need to kill myself!!! Get the fuck on with it! This needs to stop going on and on and on and for that to happen I must take action but I fucking don't! I even just want to cut well and overdose. I hate this shit. I had mental illness expression/hospital/self harm dreams again. Some of it needs to translate into reality. I am so scared and upset at losing my self harming abilities. What am I going to do?

Please don't let me be trapped here.

27-04-2019, 06:02 PM	#1282
one_step_closer The Shadow of the Day Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Scotland	I want to bash myself to death. I want to do myself some proper damage. I want to be violent towards myself. I cut but of course it was shit. I need to properly beat myself up. I hate myself! I need to kill myself!!! Get the fuck on with it! This needs to stop going on and on and on and for that to happen I must take action but I fucking don't! I even just want to cut well and overdose. I hate this shit. I had mental illness expression/hospital/self harm dreams again. Some of it needs to translate into reality. I am so scared and upset at losing my self harming abilities. What am I going to do? Please don't let me be trapped here.
	I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much. Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass. You didn't come this far just to come this far.