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one_step_closer · 27-07-2019, 01:00 PM

Thank you.

I told myself last night that I really need to OD today but again I didn't buy what I need. When I'm really tired in bed in the morning I always think I really don't want to be stuck in hospital where I would get even less sleep so I better not OD. It's kind of pathetic and I don't want to be saving myself.

I have absolutely no idea what to do because no one hears my words other than my CPN and I can't translate my pain into good physical damage either so people think I'm ok. Not that I use physical damage to communicate to others but they seem to think it defines how bad things are.

27-07-2019, 01:00 PM	#1475
one_step_closer The Shadow of the Day Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Scotland	Thank you. I told myself last night that I really need to OD today but again I didn't buy what I need. When I'm really tired in bed in the morning I always think I really don't want to be stuck in hospital where I would get even less sleep so I better not OD. It's kind of pathetic and I don't want to be saving myself. I have absolutely no idea what to do because no one hears my words other than my CPN and I can't translate my pain into good physical damage either so people think I'm ok. Not that I use physical damage to communicate to others but they seem to think it defines how bad things are.
	I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much. Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass. You didn't come this far just to come this far.