I'm not angry at you, because it's to be expected really and you can't help the way you feel. But I'm annoyed you didn't tell me sooner. You could have at least told A; she's one of your closest friends and she could have relayed the information to me. Saved me the embarrassment. I just wish you'd let me know in some way or other. Because I feel so embarrassed and humiliated and pointless and like an utter waste of space right now. I'm angry at myself for believing other people. I'm angry at myself for deceiving myself. I'm angry at myself for trusting people. I'm angry at myself for hoping. I made all the mistakes here, so I cannot be angry at you.
But please, please don't pretend to care if you don't.
I think always knew deep down that it would end like this. Before it even began. Because I'm faulty and utterly unlikeable.
And no matter what you say, I'll understand if you do hate me. Because I must look pathetic to you.
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