I don't want to get out of bed in the morning; I don't like what I do everyday. I'm annoyed with the amount of work and effort that I put into something that I don't like. I'm sick; there is something wrong with my body, and I don't know what it is. I'm tired and frustrated by being stuck in this 'nothing I can do about it' place. I finally get to see a doctor...tomorrow. I'm in a long-story-it's complicated-in limbo relationship-type thing. That's just dumping stress on me. I'll be okay either way it turns out. I just want to know. Because I have to put part of my life on hold. I think we're supposed to talk today, but he's notoriously good at managing to wiggle out of those things. I think feeling everything at one time is what's getting me down, not really one thing in particular. I've cried every day, so days over seemingly nothing, and it's not helping me emotionally. That's why I feel like I need another outlet. I feel better this morning. I mean, I still have that godawful stress, but I don't feel like I need to SI to be okay for the day.
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