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Why Can't I Sleep...Permanently?? *Triggers...something*
I See Him. All The Time. He Walks Past My Home. I See Him In Town. I See Him Going Into The Park With Girls...That's The Hardest.... I Can Smell Him. Smell His Cologne. His Jumper. I Can Hear His Voice. Every Waking Moment. But When I'm Asleep, I'm Fine, He Leaves Me Alone. All I Ever Want To Do Is Sleep. Can't I Just Go To Sleep. And Never Wake Up? Just Give In? I Mean, What's The Point In ME Living? There Is None, That's What, I Hate This. I Hate Myself. I Hate Him. I Hate It All. ='[ Sorry About This..Yeah.. |
hey
has something triggered you to feel this low? I think it wouldbe a good idea if you spoke to family/ friends and got some professional help please take care of yourself jane x |
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I won't even start until I'm certain that's what the issue is. |
no. I'm on about a guy who..well raped me.
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hes not in prison because he was my friend (until he raped me of course),
I didn't want anything more to do with any single part of him If my dad found out (which he would if I went to the police) then he would have taken me off my mum. My mum knows. She blamed me. Good that ennit? We did move home, but not far. I don't wanna move too far away anyway. 'Cause my life's here. And now I probably see him more, but that's life right. Gah it sucks!! =\ My school knows, They were complete twats about it. It's all effed =] xx xx |
abigail, how are you feeling today? I hope you are feeling a bit calmer.If you need to talk.RYL is here for you *hugs*
candescence... why laugh at my reply... also i dont think your reply was that helpful |
Hey Jane, I'm okay I guess. I haven't seen him today. Which is good. But he lives close to me, so it's a bit scary. I try not to think about it. But I'm finding it really hard to trust people, I refuse to be alone with my mum's fianceé, and I won't go near lads on my own.
I feel kinda pathetic to be honest =\ But ah well. Thank you for checking up one me. xx |
its not pathetic, have you thought about posting on the abuse board on ryl?
a lot of people have gone through what you have gone through.are you getting any help to get over what happened? *hugs*it will take time |
No, no help. When my mum took me to the doctor to get the pill, it turned out to be the doctor who psyched me a few months before, and she just told me off.
Thing is, it was a while a go, a few months. But, I don't deal with things, I pretend they didn't happen, and then they come back to bite me in ass like ages later. So now I'm getting really depressed about, more than I was when it happened. I just try to laugh it off. Ya know?? And thanks maybe I will =\ Thanks for the hugs, *hugs* back =] xx |
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