How are we all Today?

Exhausted. How are you Mark?

I hope you got some rest , Kathryn .

How are we all today?

I am getting more and more anxious . Also Fed Up of being dicked about by the CMHT.

Sorry to hear the CMHT is screwing you around Mark. I have issues with using the telephone as well and am constantly being given phone numbers to call. Man, I struggle just to call my husband on a good day, how do you expect me to call a stranger on a bad (or normal) day? *hugs*

I hope you managed to get some rest, or at least are not so exhausted, Kathryn.

Sorry to hear you are having a rough time with that mentor Annie. I hope you have had a few good days/shifts and are feeling a bit more confident. You are a student and you are a person, both mean that you can get confused or make mistakes - even someone well trained can make mistakes - and if the mentor cannot handle that they really shouldn't be a mentor. *safe hugs*

Things have been absolutely crazy here between medical appointments, university and attempting to have a social life. Trying to find a respite carer so my husband can take a break has been especially difficult. Meh...

*Glomps Kahlia*

I don't have a social life since my friend moved away.

Kahlia, have you tried contacting the community care access point? I know phones are difficult, maybe your hubby or social worker(if you have one) can make contact for you?
Im all in a flapp about this grad position thing. I neeed either my passport or birth certificate, and my partner cannot find them. I've had a couple of days with a nice mentor, and I basically handled our allocation today. leaves me feeling more postive about the whole thing. it also probably helps that i am keeping up with my meds
*safe hugsfor all*

Thanks big brother. Since being in the wheelchair we just cannot get out as often so I usually only leave the house when I absolutely have to. *sigh* and *glomps*

We are also looking into the NDIS Annie. Hopefully we can get some more support. At this point - aside from the physiotherapist and OT - we only get domestic services. Once a week they have 45 minutes to clean the house, and luckily most of them have been good. As this is provided by Blue Care we pay for them, but at a reduced cost. Respite care and personal care aren't something that we can get from them unfortunately. I'm very glad the last couple of day at placement have been an improvement.

Good news: the OT rang today to say that my MASS/CAECTI application for the wheelchair has been approved meaning we wait for the letter and for it to be ordered, but we're one step closer.

Bad news: I've managed to fall out of my wheelchair three times and during a solo transfer and, as a result, I am in even more agony than usual. I didn't get any university work done today and have been feeling bad. Really, really want to harm myself but... I can't. *sigh*

*safe hugs for everyone*
*leaves hot chocolate, cocoa, tea and coffee on the table*
*disappears inside pillow fort to switch and colour in*

Om Man , From being messed about by the CMHT to "You've got an appointment with a Locum Psych in 5 Hours" Crikey , Anxious.

Gees that's fast Mark. Good luck with it, and hubby and I are here for you if you need a chat. You've got this big brother. *hugs*

Thanks Kahlia Sis, and Hubby <3 I'll let you know what happens , maybe not tonight as it may be too "raw" but maybe tomorrow.

Always here for you big brother. *hugs*

They cancelled a quarter of an hour ago . . . . Diaz I think.

Mark, *huge hugs*

This morning really hasn't started off too well. Waking up in agony, my body playing up, etc and now I've gone and spilled my pain syrup all over myself, the floor and the kitchen bench.

Just going to cry in the corner...

*Hugs Kahlia*

*Safe Hugs Y'all*

-checks in-

I feeling tearful. Seems like I going round in curcles again and can't be helped. Need some to make me no feel so alone and frightened X

How are you not now , Have a little Faith?

How are we all doing ?

How are y'all ?

I cannot control My Anxiety.

So depressed right now and5 having strong thoughts about SI and suicide. Really trying to hang on but honestly not sure it's worth the effort.

Hope everyone else is doing better.

*safe hugs*

It's worth the Effort Kahlia , Sis *Hugs*

Struggling to see the point in anything right now.

You know to get hold of me , Ashley , Hun *Hugs*

I feel like I'm fighting against myself everyday just to stay alive. I don't think I'm strong enough anymore.

How are we all today?

I need to be here just now. I don't feel safe.

*Hugs Ashley*

Hey Folks, How are we all?

Doikers you're always asking how everyone else is. How are you?

Ah that's Sweet , Spacey , I'm Anxious and low and oh so BPD these days. How are you?

How are we all doing , folks?

Been awhile. How is everyone?

I don't know what the point is anymore. Life is just too overwhelming.

*Hugs Kathryn* Hiya :)
I'm sorry you feel so overwhelmed , hun , I feel it too :(

It sounds like everyone is having a hard time holding on at the moment.
*safe hugs to everyone who needs/wants them*

After trying to chase down my wheelchair application I find that the OT who submitted it didn't finalize it until August 3rd. Now we're having issues because they don't know whether it falls under the new disability scheme just released in our area or the old one. I hate bureaucracy.

On the positive side, yesterday was my 8 year SI free anniversary.

Now I'm just going to curl up in a corner and cry. Really not coping right now.

I'm sorry everyone is feeling so overwhelmed. *safe hugs to all who would like them*

I really want to just explode on Facebook. Just pour out everything that goes on. Maybe then some of my family would understand why I may not call them as often, exactly how much crap I really do, and why I am always so dang tired. They would get a glimpse into what really goes on in my life and maybe for once understand. But with that, I'm sure many questions, which I don't have any answers to, would come. And I would be more stressed out than I am now. Overall it's a bad idea, I know it is. Yet it'd be nice for family and friends to understand and know. So for now I'll just come here, to my little corner of the world, where you guys understand how overwhelming life can be and it's perfectly okay to curl up in a corner with my blanket. *sigh*

Great News Kahlia Sis :) *Hugs*

*Hugs Kathryn*

How is everyone today?

Had to Take a Diaz . . . .

I am sick of fighting. I cannot do it anymore

It's Hard , Auragrace , but it has to be worth it , hun.

Thank you. Today's been a little better went for a walk and picked some fruit for dessert. And I am feeling a little better

That's Good , What fruit did you pick?

How is everyone?

Insomnia - no rest for the wicked. I must be insanely wicked.
I'm in a can't state. Its all " should be asleep" and " should assignment" and I'm like "can't"
Can't
Miss my dog.
Not feeling up to anything. Could be forced sleep deprivation. That point of tiredness where you are unable to sleep.
Am pretty sure this is down.
Strangely enough, usually when I post about the fact that insomnia is, in my family at least, genetic and whine about how I can't on here, I manage to get some sleep not long after. Hoping it works this time.

I Hope you are Sleeping , Annie :)

*puts a tray of warm, fresh brownies on the table*

Anyone out there?
I'm struggling. A fair bit.

Hey Annie , I hope you are okay , Will check back .

Hi Mark. How's things? *squishes you*

I don't want to adult anymore. Nope, don't want to do this responsible thing.
I'm sick of the telephone. I want to drown it.

Hey Annie . I'm Low and Flat and Insecure and Lonely . All more then usual today.
I share your dislike of phones.
I am not a happy bunny.

How are you all today?

Really crappy. Spent all shift fantasising about hurting myself.
Can't get in to see my counsellor. May have to have a sickie to see her.
I'm not coping. My sleep is shot, and I want to shave my head. All signs of downward trajectory, for me at least.
So I shall hide here.

Annie , PM if you need ? *Safe Hugs*
I know the sleep being shot feeling plus had an an almost constant headache from stress for over 2 months plus MH issues.

Had a chat with mum. Ended up saying the truth, I'm burnt out. Burnt out on aged care, my job, uni and the hardest one to admit, my relationship.
I feel awful. I'm just gonna hide here.

Annie *Hugs if Okay*