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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

PoisonedApple 25-04-2011 10:02 PM

hehe Awwwww but bunny is delicious!
*hugs Mark, Jeff, Felicia and Laura*

Louise 25-04-2011 10:08 PM

cries...

misskitty112 25-04-2011 10:12 PM

The following content has been hidden - Reason : because I feel like it/sometimes I don't wanna say things but need to.
Somedays, I feel like I should just leave/disappear/fall off the face of the earth.
I feel so useless, unloved, like I'm a waste of time and space.
I fail at everything.
Why does the world need me?

*sigh*

Doikers 25-04-2011 10:16 PM

Felicia,I need you ,I would bedead without you. <3

misskitty112 25-04-2011 10:22 PM

*hugs Mark* Thank you :). I wish I knew what to say <3

Laura2.0 25-04-2011 11:45 PM

*hugs mark and felicia*
I'm feeling the same way sometimes.

Louise 25-04-2011 11:49 PM

hugs laura

Cazki 26-04-2011 12:49 AM

*Hugs Mark* Sorry your struggling mate

*Hugs Serenity* Are you?

*Hugs Louise* Whats up louise are you ok?

*Hugs Felicia* I'm sorry your not feeling great :(

*Hugs Laura* I'm doing well thanks. Im sorry that your not doing great

*Hugs Jeff* I'm sorry your struggling, hope you feel better soon

*Hugs Megz*

*Hugs Mor certa*

*Hugs Crimson*

Mors Certa 26-04-2011 03:57 AM

The following content has been hidden - Reason : Useless ramblings

I am not safe right now, I cannot explain the feelings running through me, I know that I need to call the crisis team, but I know their response would be to put me away. Why can't I just get past this feeling, I know my meds are screwed up, and in time they will get adjusted and work again, but it is so hard to wait when I feel like I don't want to go on another minute

I am going to hide in a corner, maybe this will pass

BWchick 26-04-2011 04:14 AM

*Huggles wardies* how is everyone today?

Kahlia1981 26-04-2011 10:36 AM

*hugs those who can accept*

In serious pain, facing a future of bankruptcy through no fault of our own. Combined we get less assistance than a single mother with one kid at school. We've got maybe two months before we have to stop eating, taking meds and pretty much everything else so we can pay the bills. Unless my fiance can find work. But no-one wants to give him a go so far.

Sorry, just really stressed.

Laura (Fallinstar): Sending you a message hun. Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you.

Doikers 26-04-2011 10:44 AM

*Hugs Felicia*

*Hugs Megz*

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Jeff*

*Hugs Kahlia*

Doikers 26-04-2011 12:25 PM

Well My Social Worker Beth showed up, I was actually honest with her and she is going to get me a Dr's Appointment I think.

one_step_closer 26-04-2011 02:04 PM

Well done, Mark.

Doikers 26-04-2011 02:09 PM

Thanks Lindsay *Hugs* How are you?

Louise 26-04-2011 03:24 PM

well done mark that takes a lot of courage.

frenchhorn 26-04-2011 04:20 PM

*hugs all who want hugs*

I'm all moved into my new flat and its really nice, I have lots of space.
The crisis team came to see me yesterday, they said we hae a kind of contract where I don't OD while I'm with them, sort of gives me more pressure, but I have a plan to OD next week when I am home from my parents house.

I still don't have internet in my flat yet, I'm in uni atm, but shall be sorting it ASAP.

Doikers 26-04-2011 05:30 PM

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Louise*

*Spots and Hugs Laura*

shadowedsoul 26-04-2011 07:03 PM

cuddles all, curls up into a ball.

SoMuchMore 26-04-2011 07:48 PM

*hugs mark back*

*hugs everyone else*

Doikers 26-04-2011 07:59 PM

*Squishes Jill Hard*

*Massive Hugs Laura*

How are you girls?

PoisonedApple 26-04-2011 08:01 PM

*sits in the corner and picks at bits of paper*

Doikers 26-04-2011 08:08 PM

I have been fantasizing pushing blades right into me for a few days I worked up the nerve , lost the plot last night and tried it twice , :( I Told my Social worker and now am waiting on a cancellation to meet the Psych....

Doikers 26-04-2011 08:08 PM

*Hugs Crimson* Whats up hun?

PoisonedApple 26-04-2011 08:13 PM

I haven't been at the point of bothering to shave in a week or so... Figured it'd be fine to go to this "black tie" party at work in a black suit w/ a silver shirt and black and silver tie... noooooo they want to have us dressed up (an attorney is dressing us up in dresses). i am self conscious enough as is without having to wear a dress and i dunno if i can talk t into letting me just wear what I planned to...
Thought picking apart paper was a constructive-ish outlet for the moment.

Doikers 26-04-2011 08:49 PM

Go In a suit Crimson hun , I shave every so often and know how hard it can be and how triggering to run blades across yourself *Squishes*

shadowedsoul 26-04-2011 08:53 PM

squishes mark back. hmm im feeling really stressed out of other. i had some really stuiped thoughts today when i went out, wanted to run in front of a train, or jump off a high building. my head is so fu!ked up today its scaring me.

Doikers 26-04-2011 09:03 PM

*Hugs Jill* I know that stuff , tbh I am there right now too, I hope you stay safe hun :)

PoisonedApple 26-04-2011 09:10 PM

*super squishes Mark*
Thank the Gods! They misspoke... T is covering us in "tissue paper dresses"... ugly but not terrifying.

Doikers 26-04-2011 09:16 PM

*Hugs Crimson* Yey!! They sound ............weird lol but Yey at any rate!

shadowedsoul 26-04-2011 09:17 PM

hugs mark, you too hon. crimson that sound kind of cool, and fun. hope you have fun hon

Mors Certa 26-04-2011 11:00 PM

The thoughts are coming back, I can't seem to stop entertaining them, in some fashion it is calming to think about, stops the anxiety, or at least pushes it back a little. I don't know what to do with these thoughts, I know how dangerous it can be to let them sit in my head and simmer, but I also know how painful it is without this comfort. I definitely belong in the ward when I am feeling this way, it is the only safe place, protect me from myself. Sorry to be a blight on the festive mood, I just don't know what to do anymore, don't think these thoughts are right, but they are so strong.

Doikers 26-04-2011 11:17 PM

*Hugs Jeff*

*Hugs my wardies night*

PoisonedApple 26-04-2011 11:35 PM

*hugs Jill, Mark and Jeff*
The "dress" was atrocious... If they email us the pics they took I'll have to share in here. I think I pulled off sane and happy in them. I won the "Where's Waldo?" Gold Star Award for finding next to impossible to find files LOL :) It was fun. Complete with the attorneys serving us a 3 course meal, rolls and drinks (soda, water and sparkling apple cider rather than champagne).
On a sad note I found out at the end of the party (when she was leaving for the day) that a coworker that I worked closely with when I volunteered before I was hired (known her for 5 yrs now) has a brain tumor and they're operating soon so no one knows if she'll survive it let alone be back to work...

Have you tried writing it all down Jeff? Kind of a way of putting it all outside of yourself?

Good night Mark!

Laura2.0 27-04-2011 12:39 AM

*hugs Jeff*
*hugs mark* good night
*hugs crimson* sounds like you had a great time.

I just came homw from work an hour ago.
Posted on the ED forum yesterday, cause of some fvcked up eating habits. They say I should talk with the psych about it in 3 weeks. It's going to be my first appointment. So scared. Whats going to happen with me there?

Cazki 27-04-2011 12:59 AM

I'm annoyed :( had a crap morning. Had an appointment today (at a training thing which the job centre reffered me to sometime ago. It was at 11.30 am this morning i got there just before 11.20 am. I waited for my consultant in another room. All of a sudden i saw her, but instead of calling me she just used her hand to say come here. Anyway when i went to her desk with her she started bloody moaning at me. She said why are you late Ian!? I wasnt late at all, she said the appointment was for 11.00 am but its not because it says on the paper that she gave me 11.30 am. She was just so rude to me and unproffesional.

Then she looked at her computer and said why didnt you attend this activity i said i completely forgot which is my fault i know but that the woman spoke to me and asked me why i didnt attend and i said that it slipped my mind she said to me thats ok not to worry. But then my consultant said il be speaking to the jobcentre, great i bet my money will be stopped now! Brilliant! I'm signing on tomorrow and im going to tell them how rude my consultant was and that she had a go at me for being late when i wasnt. Totally ridiculous! I wasnt even bloody late! I wasnt rude to her at all. I'm just really annoyed though. Before i sign on im going back up to see my consultant to show her the piece of paper she gave me with the appointment time on. Its an agreement you have to sign. Sorry this was so long.

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Mark* I'm so sorry about the thoughts your having, please keep safe. We are all here for you.

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Crimson*

*Hugs Jeff*

Laura2.0 27-04-2011 01:13 AM

*hugs Ian* It's not your failt that she was rude to you. It's her problem if she can't organize her appointments.

Doikers 27-04-2011 10:23 AM

*Hugs Jeff*
*Hugs Crimson*
*Hugs Laura*
*Hugs Ian*

Louise 27-04-2011 12:46 PM

hugs everyone

Doikers 27-04-2011 02:29 PM

*Hugs Louise* How are you hun?

Louise 27-04-2011 03:21 PM

i am tired today, looking out at the sun. - how are you

one_step_closer 27-04-2011 04:08 PM

The sun is nice :)

I've just been to the gym and now I don't know what to do. It's so hard to fill my time.

Doikers 27-04-2011 05:29 PM

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs Lindsay*

I'm............I am fluctuating up and down. Actually happy for the first time in weeks then BOOM! depression hits me yet again and repeat...

Mors Certa 27-04-2011 06:09 PM

Sorry to hear that you are fluctuating in that fashion, I know how irritating and frustrating it can be

Doikers 27-04-2011 06:20 PM

*Hugs Jeff* Thanks , How are you mate?

Mors Certa 27-04-2011 06:23 PM

Right now I am doing okay, the roller coaster ride is leveling off for a little bit. I prefer it here in the middle, neither up nor down. I hope that you can find some level ground as well.

frenchhorn 27-04-2011 06:37 PM

*hugs all*

sorry I'm not around much, internet is a bugger to sort out!

SoMuchMore 27-04-2011 07:39 PM

*hugs ian* im sorry that she was so rude. Its not your fault it all. Sounds like a rough day.

*hugs mark* i'm sorry your mood is fluctuating so much. I know how frustrating that can be.

*hugs lindsay* Its good that you went to the gym. Hope you found something else to do - like go out for coffee or tea or something?

*hugs louise* Glad the sun is out there. we haven't seen sun here in days.

*hugs oliver* its okay, we understand. how r u doing? liking the new flat?

*hugs jeff* (if that's okay to call you jeff) Glad you are finding a middle ground for your mood. Sorry to hear that some of your thoughts were coming back. Feel free to vent here if you need to talk.

*hugs crimson* Glad you had a good time. Sorry about your friend. I'll keep them in my thoughts.

*hugs mute.scream laura* I think it would be really brave of you to talk to your psych about ED related stuff. I know its nerve-wrecking to see a psych for the first time. But they will probably just get some background information on you on the first day. Hopefully it won't be too scary.

Sorry if I missed people... I just did this page.

Now I am dreaming about SI. Great *sarcasm*

Doikers 27-04-2011 08:17 PM

*Hugs Laura* Sarcasm is understood well here , I'm actually with you there :)

*Hugs Oliver* How is your new flat , are you living alone or with a flatmate?

*Hugs Jeff* I LOVE the Happy but I Hate the sad , usually I'm numb but recently I've been Down and because of circumstances happy , but my depression keeps hitting me down :S

Doikers 27-04-2011 10:08 PM

Just so everyone know the happy news , Felicia and I are engaged :)


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