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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

FlyingNy 27-09-2010 07:21 PM

Please try not to Nicole. I know how strong urges can be, but you'll feel so much better in the long run if you resist. Think of how you feel in the morning after you've managed to resist cutting. Strong, like you've won.

SparkleKitten 27-09-2010 07:46 PM

I feel terrible today, I'm still kinda fed up of my degree, I mean I can do it, it just seems dull and uninteresting, and I know thats because my brain chemistry is being chewed up by my meds, but I'm scared that I'll fail. Really triggered too, but I refuse to give in. The praise from my counsellor and fiance after not doing so for a week is warming and gives me hope, I just don't know what to do with myself. I realised I want to do something else with my life but now I can't for another 2 years due to my degree and I know I'm not doing great at it and I'm just confused. Sorry.

Doikers 27-09-2010 08:01 PM

*Hugs Sarah* Sorry it's not more :S

SoMuchMore 27-09-2010 08:03 PM

*feels invisible* not even a hello after not posting for 2 days? :-(

I know i sound really whiny when i say that b/c i know we are all struggling but... *shrug*

nevermind.

Doikers 27-09-2010 08:12 PM

*Hugs Laura* Sorry :S I really didn't mean to make you feel invisible , you're not invisible to us here I promise . I'm triggered and not happy that I've been chosen to be examined about my benefits , and pretty scared about that . But still sorry .

misskitty112 27-09-2010 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doikers (Post 2507043)
*Hugs Jill* Talk to us if you feel triggered , it might help :)

*Hugs Felicia* I'm sorry you dislike school , Do you like some parts of it ? you could focus on them ?

That was me being melodramatic. I was upset that I have to do so much revision and it felt like school's beating my ass. But it's midterm week, it's supposed to feel like that. Actually, if I'm completely honest, school keeps me sane... I mean, come on, all I do is lose myself in a story, discuss it, then write about it. It's pretty much heaven.

*hugs Lia*
*hugs Nicole* please don't harm
*hugs Sarah* I'm sorry everything is so confusing
*glomps Laura* I've missed you! I'm sorry everything is so busy and your position isn't explained. I'm sure you'll still rock it though. I'm glad you had a nice weekend with your family. And I agree, one reason to live is enough. <3
*hugs Mark* I'm sorry you're so triggered, dear. You can PM me if you'd like.

As I think I've stated, school is beating my ass. I've had to map out an hour by hour chart of how to get my work done. So I work for Banned Books Week at 3, then my chart starts at 4.... yay.
Oh, and I got 5 books at the book sale today The Da Vinci Code, Angels and Demons, then three incredibly trashy vampire romances. School needs to calm the eff down so I can read them.

Louise 27-09-2010 08:27 PM

hugs everyone

Thinking about you all

Doikers 27-09-2010 08:32 PM

*Sigh* Thankyou for the offer of a PM Felicia, I wish I'd read it before I injured can I PM you another time if I get triggered or need a chat again ? I really don't want to make you busier on top of your school work .
Why has the council picked ME to examine housing benefits ?:( I'm worried.

Doikers 27-09-2010 08:34 PM

*Hugs Louise* How are you?

misskitty112 27-09-2010 08:35 PM

Mark, I promise, PMs don't make me any busier. I would love for you to PM me next time you get triggered... or find me on Facebook, I'm always there. Either one works. =)
It could be just a routine examination type thing. I get examined all the time for my Mental Health benefits and such. I wouldn't be too worried. It'll all work out =)

SparkleKitten 27-09-2010 08:43 PM

So I just typed out some individuals and my laptop had a hissy, so here we go, this is helpful, keeps me distracted...

*hugs Louise* Thanks, thats really sweet :)

*Snuggles Felicia* Thanks, I know that having it to focus on and having it to go to keeps me sane but I just feel so hopeless sometimes :(

*cuddles Mark* You'll be okay, you're honest and so you have nothing to worry about. I hope you'll be okay though.

*bear hugs Laura* I'm sorry, I didn't read any previous posts before venting :(

*cuddles Lia* Your advice, though not pointed at me, really helped. Thanks, and I know what you mean about the mother situation. Mine can be truly awful with me.

*cuddles Nicole* I hate group work too, and I have so much of it this year :( it really gets to me.

*snuggles anyone I missed*

x

Scarletdreamer 27-09-2010 09:22 PM

*hides in a hole after giving Laura some big cuddles*

I just wish... oh poop, never mind. :'(

Doikers 27-09-2010 09:24 PM

*Bear Hugs April* What do you wish ?......

MammaMia 27-09-2010 09:41 PM

*cuddles all*

Louise 27-09-2010 09:42 PM

cries

Doikers 27-09-2010 09:44 PM

*Cuddles Helen* How are you this evening ?

*Hugs Louise* Whats happened ? Are you okay?

Louise 27-09-2010 09:50 PM

i'm sorry feeling low, me being stupid

SparkleKitten 27-09-2010 09:57 PM

*cuddles Louise, Helen, Mark and April*

I feel terrible :( its just not fair

Doikers 27-09-2010 10:02 PM

*Hugs the Ward* I'm going to bed , tired(ish) , I hope I get nice post tomorrow :)
Goodnight Wardies :)

Louise 27-09-2010 10:05 PM

night night mark

MammaMia 27-09-2010 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Louise (Post 2507324)
cries

Quote:

Originally Posted by Louise (Post 2507331)
i'm sorry feeling low, me being stupid

* offers cuddles* You're not being stupid. Sorry you're feeling low.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doikers (Post 2507327)
*Cuddles Helen* How are you this evening

Full of tiredness and excitement!!! *cuddles Mark*

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ribenalion (Post 2507338)
*cuddles Louise, Helen, Mark and April*

I feel terrible :( its just not fair

It's never fair feeling terrible :( I felt like **** emotionally yesterday which carried on to this morning but I've brightened up since then. But feel **** physically, joy hey? *cuddles*

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doikers (Post 2507349)
*Hugs the Ward* I'm going to bed , tired(ish) , I hope I get nice post tomorrow :)
Goodnight Wardies :)

Sleep well =) xxxxx

FlyingNy 27-09-2010 10:23 PM

*Hugs everyone.

I'm so glad my words helped you Sarah, that actually made me feel better making you feel better. Lol, does that make sense?

*Hugs Laura* How are you today?

*Hugs Louise* You're not being stupid. We're here to listen if you want us to.

*Hugs Mark* Night night, hope you sleep well.

*HUgs April* What's up?

*Hugs Helen* Hey, hey, you alright?

*Hugs Felicia* Sorry your work's all getting on top of you and everything. Do you necessarily have to redo the whole paper? Couldn't you just change bits, or leave it as it is? After all, it's English, you can't be wrong as long as your argument is good.

I'm pretty fed up tonight, but otherwise alright. My mum hit me and told me I was disgusting (not at the same time). The she had a go at me for using my phone, and just about everything else I did. My sister swore at me and raised a sarcasic eyebrow at my outfit this morning and said 'nice'. Just another day in this family then.

shadowedsoul 27-09-2010 11:11 PM

hugs lia.cuddles everbody else.
wow another crap day. erm ended up selfharming on more time, and now my knuckles are kill me, not great. still feel like i want to hurt again.

FlyingNy 27-09-2010 11:39 PM

*Hugs Jill* Sorry you felt low enough to cut. I hope you don't do it again. I care about you. I've never met you, but I care.

Louise 27-09-2010 11:43 PM

thanks, it means a lot, just had a ruff day most things going wrong.

*hugs lia, Jill and helen*

misskitty112 28-09-2010 12:18 AM

Lia, I don't *have* to redo the whole thing, but I have to add and reverse points and it all just confuses me. I'd almost rather start over, but I marked up my orginal copy... so I feel a bit better about it. Also I'm sorry everything was bad today *hugs*

*hugs Jill* sorry you felt low enough to harm.

shadowedsoul 28-09-2010 01:02 AM

thanks guys that means alot to me. curls up under a blanket and hides

shadow13 28-09-2010 01:20 AM

no no no no no no no no no!!!!!!! I think my mom may have just seen me cut! I just needed to tonight. I needed to... I just felt like the last 3 months came crashing down upon me. I only did it twice, so it's not as much as last time... But still! What if she saw? When I noticed her I'd just put down my tool and was looking at my arm while holding it.
Can I pass this off as something? like my arm was bruised? but at the same time I had my medi-kit on the bed, I told her: I was just checking my medi-kit, dont know if she understood though... Anyway... HELP! this was like half an hour ago and she still hasn't said ANYTHING, maybe.... just maybe she didn't comprehend what I was doing? Oh GODS! I don't know what to do! my parents know that the rest of my siblings have cut.... I just don't know what to do or say and I'm shaking... Help Help Help... :crying:

misskitty112 28-09-2010 02:13 AM

Shad, try to calm down. I'm not the best advice giver, but if they don't bring it up and you don't want to say anything about it, then I would just not say anything and I'd act like nothing happened?
I don't know what to say if your parents do bring it up. *hugs* Thinking of you.

Grr... I'm gonna go journal cause I'm so pissed. and I don't want to put what pissed me off on here yet cause it has to do with my little brother and how my family/stepfamily is treating him. *sigh*
I don't really care if life is good for me, but can't it be good for him?

MedicAsh 28-09-2010 02:28 AM

*hugs for all*

I like hugs :) they make me feel better. I wish I could get them in real life :(

SoMuchMore 28-09-2010 05:19 AM

*hugs mark* im sorry that you are being reviewed. That would stress me out too. Hope you are okay.

*hugs nicole* I hate group projects as well. i'm sorry that you were so triggered.

*hugs jill* im sorry that you SI-ed. Hope that you managed to stay safe the rest of the evening.

*hugs lia* i'm sorry that your mom and sister were treating you badly today. You don't deserve that at all.

*hugs april* you okay hun? what do you wish?

*hugs felicia* sounds like you are really busy as well. Good luck with getting everything done! I know what you mean when you say that school keeps you sane. It does for me too, even if I do complain about how busy and stressed it can also make me. Im sorry that your family was treating your brother badly.

*hugs sarah* if you don't want to do the degree you are working toward, then why not switch? I mean, you dont want to be stuck in a position after graduation where you are going to be unhappy. I don't know.. i guess it would all depend on if you think you could handle those extra years of school or not. Also, you may be able to get many different types of jobs with whatever degree you are getting, you arent just boxed into what it says on the diploma.

*hugs ash* im sorry you dont get many hugs in real life, but virtual hugs are better than nothing, right? *extra hugs*

*hugs louise* sorry that you had a bad day. Here to talk if you need to.

*hugs helen* glad that your mood lifted throughout the day! Don't you get to see your bestie soon? That's got to be exciting :-)

*hugs shad* i agree that with felicia, that unless they bring it up i just wouldn't say anything. I understand not wanting to let your family know about any of the SI problems you have... however, do you think you could get some extra support if you did?

Sorry about earlier everyone. Thanks for the hugs, I really appreciate it. I do feel invisible in here sometimes though.. not to everyone but sometimes... Well anyway. i had a crap day after a rather optimistic morning. Just a lot of little annoyances and frustrations adding up.. got stuck in the middle of several arguments, which isn't fun and seems to happen to me far too often. Its fine though. I'm trying to do some work and laundry but just feel like going to sleep.

risenfromperdition 28-09-2010 06:24 AM

*hugs laura lots*
sorry i got off like an hour before you got on before and then just got back on for a second =[ message me on fb if you wanna hun. *does work and laundry for you so you can gets sleep*

Doikers 28-09-2010 12:12 PM

*Hugs Heather*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs April*

*Hugs Shad*

*Hugs Helen*

*Hugs Ash*

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs Felicia*

*Hugs Jill*

*Hugs Lia*

*Hugs The ward*

RYUU 28-09-2010 01:22 PM

only been up for about 10 mins and already the devil is telling me to do things
i cant handle another day of this

Doikers 28-09-2010 01:25 PM

*Hugs Ryuu* When do you see your cpn ?

RYUU 28-09-2010 01:27 PM

Friday i see him

Doikers 28-09-2010 01:34 PM

Could you make an emergency appointment with him or do you think you'll be able to hold on until Friday? I am concerned for you :S

RYUU 28-09-2010 01:48 PM

i have just taken my anti psychotics ill give them time to work and see how they do if they dont do anything i will give him a call

xflutterbyex 28-09-2010 02:00 PM

Can I check in for a few days?

*curls up in a small corner so she isnt any bother*

Doikers 28-09-2010 02:03 PM

Hi Hopeful again , Welcome to the ward . I'm Mark

misskitty112 28-09-2010 03:54 PM

*Hugs Ryuu*
Hi, HopefulAgain! I'm Felicia. Of course you can check in here!
*Hugs Mark* How are you?

So... I think I may tye dye a shirt today for banned book week, since our sponsor gave away my shirt I was supposed to get for working. whooo!

Kahlia1981 28-09-2010 04:07 PM

*offers all wardies hugs*

Just quickly popping in while I have a minute to say that although it has only been a day or so I'm missing you all terribly. I think that I may be addicted to the VPW. :-(

Life here without a computer is incredibly rough. But it can't rain all the time and sooner or later I will have to catch a break and something will finally have to go my way.

Take care and make sure that you take care of one another.

Doikers 28-09-2010 04:33 PM

*Hugs Felicia* I'm getting nervous about my ever impending Psych Dr appoinment , I mean I've got to ask for him to prescribe me some Diazapam seen as my GP is not co-operating with that and I Need it but I don't want to come over as seeking meds I don't need and Diaz in addictive and I have an addictive personality but I really Need the Diaz for my Anxiety NOT for a "fix". , Does that make sense?

*Hugs Kahlia*

shadowedsoul 28-09-2010 05:31 PM

cuddles all, erm feeling very out of it right now, head feels fuzzy. dont feel like me, if that makes any sence.

one_step_closer 28-09-2010 05:49 PM

Hello everyone.

Doikers 28-09-2010 05:51 PM

*Hugs Jill* That makes sense yes .

*Hugs Lindsay*How are you doing?

SoMuchMore 28-09-2010 07:48 PM

*hugs heather* hope that you were able to get some sleep and that your day went well

*hugs mark* that makes sense about what you were saying to felicia about the doctors. I'm sorry that your GP isnt cooperating. You always seem to have problems with your meds, and you dont deserve it all all. *extra hugs* hope that the appointment goes well.

*hugs RYUU* please be honest with your cpn at your appointment on friday. Hope that your meds are helping. Don't listen to the devil, he is not right in what he is telling you.

*hugs lindsay* how have you been?

*hugs felicia* hope that the ty-dying goes well. That sucks that he gave away your shirt, but way to make the most of it by taking things into your own hands :-)

*hugs kahlia* I'm sorry that your computer is broken, that really sucks... I really miss everyone here when I dont post for awhile as well. I hope that you catch a break soon too b/c you really deserve a break.

*hugs hopefulagain* Of course you can come in! Hi! I'm Laura. We are a pretty friendly bunch most of the time :-)

*hugs jill* that does make sense. I wish I had some advice. I can understand the feeling of being really out of it though.

*hugs april, helen, crimson, oliver, julie, nicole, lia, taz, steph, and everyone else that hasnt posted recently*

I think im loosing stamina for fighting SI urges.. its been almost 2 weeks. Nobody would notice or anything, so sometimes i wonder why i try to quit. I guess just because cognitively i know that it is bad and maladaptive. Why does my mood come crashing down every time I have a happy moment? I hate that. Maybe I should just accept that things arent going to change, no matter how hard im trying to change them or what is going on... i'm always going to think like this.

Doikers 28-09-2010 07:55 PM

*Hugs Laura* You won't always think like this Laura , you are right that you will have to work hard but you will beat this , we all will :) And ... almost 2 weeks is pretty good going :) Well done !!

SoMuchMore 28-09-2010 08:05 PM

*hugs mark* thanks, 2 weeks isnt that long for me though.. i have this pattern of stopping for about a month and then doing it a lot for a little bit and then stopping again... i feel like im stuck in a circle a lot of times with it. And I know that its hard to beat.. and I truly believe that every one of you in here can live free and happy... i just with I could believe that for myself.

shadowedsoul 28-09-2010 08:20 PM

curls up and hides.


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