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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

Ileana 11-04-2008 08:14 AM

I wish I was someone else.

Detour. Derail 11-04-2008 12:47 PM

Yuck. I went to hospital.
I had my STUPID assessment :pinch:
I came to college...
I couldnt stop crying before...
now I just feel...weird :blink:

Jetforce 11-04-2008 12:55 PM

*hugs alexx, ally, chloe, helen, emma, ileana and any1 i missed*

Errrh, me? i don't feel too great atm...but i'll battle thru it i suppose, nothing too major i can't handle.


But how is everybody else? I'm worried about u ally....look after urself hon xx

Yeah alexx...how did the assessment go? I hope they don't automatically send u to hosp, now that would suck :-(

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 01:32 PM

*hugs for all*
I hope you are all ok and keeping safe.

I wish I wasn't so nosy. It's just made me feel worse. I shouldn't be with him because it hurts him when my mood shifts etc. I don't want to hurt him *cries*

Detour. Derail 11-04-2008 01:49 PM

I had to go to the Mental Health unit at hospital...except I got lost so I ended up stopping this nurse and talking at like...a million miles an hour because I was panicking, so the nurse took me to the right place...but I was sure she'd taken me to the WRONG place just to spite me, so I got really aggitated.
Then the assessment woman (Julie) came to see me, took me into the assessment room. I convinvced myself she thought I was just a time waster...and she kept sayig "see...you have aims..plans...like going to uni" but to be honest...I dont think I'm ACTUALLY gonna MAKE it that far...I'll end up failing :pinch:
She said to go home, and call Central Youth to arrange ANOTHER counsellor (so I'll be having two sessions a week with two different counsellors :/) and she's going to call me back on Thursday to see how I'm doing, then I have to have a med review and after that she's gonna talk to the psychiatrist, see what he recommends and if my meds arent working, she's going to see about changing them.
Thing is...my first meds really helped...but they made me SOOOOOOOOO sick.... :( and all the meds since have been useless.
No one is listening to me...the anti-anxiety pills are supposed to work almost straight away...the anti-depressants take 2-3 weeks...but after being on this medication for nearly 3 weeks, I'm still panicking and having panic attacks MOST days....so CLEARLY I need something abit stronger....
but that's clearly not obvious to them.

I'm scared....I feel really unstable...she asked if I had any "plans" and I said no...because at the time I didn't...but then I got on the bus and couldn't stop crying and now the plans are all forming....really really strong plans....*sigh*:-(

I don't want to go to psychology...I want to hide...

MammaMia 11-04-2008 03:34 PM

Wow.

I'm so suidicial. Yet trying to be postive. It's going to be a VERY VERY VERY hard weekend, but I CAN and WILL get through this. **** aint gonna beat me and kill me and let you lose me!!!! Wooo =]

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 03:57 PM

:) I'm glad that you are trying to be positive Helen. You are right, you can get through this weekend. Try and occupy yourself with friends, even if you don't particularly want to.

chocostashchick 11-04-2008 05:47 PM

*squishes Alexx and Carole and Helen and Jeremy and Chloe and Alyssa and Ileana and everybody else in the whole entire world*
*passes out purple virtual lolipops*

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 06:25 PM

*hugs Callie* Thanks for the virtual lolipop. Purple's my favouritest colour in the whole wide world! :D How are you doing?

~*forever_broken*~ 11-04-2008 06:58 PM

Helen I am very proud of you, you are being VERY positive and you're right.. You CAN do this, you CAN hold on.

*hugs Helen, Emma, Callie, Carole, Cloe, Alexx and anyone else that wants one*

About 9 hours till I get to go home and drink myself blind...

Pomegranate 11-04-2008 08:15 PM

mmmm Alcccooohhhooolll.....Ally, I am not even going to comment and tell you how you shouldn't drink cos it would be way too hypocritical but be careful yeah? *offers hugs*

Alexx, I'm sorry things didn't go quite as you expected. Was she a member of the Community Mental Health Team? Could you call your psychiatrist yourself and see whether he/she will up your meds?

*hugs Jeremy and Ileana* how are you doing now?

Carole, you deserve to be loved and cared for. Your mood swings are not your fault hun *hugs*

Helen, I am just having a text conversation with you but stay strong and in that positive frame of mind. You are right you CAN do this and we will help you.

How was your day Callie? *passes candyfloss*
Has Chloe been on yet?

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 08:30 PM

*hugs Ally, Emma and Helen then leaves hugs for those who want or need*

Ally, I hope you are able to be mindful of the amount you drink or the avaliabilty of any thing else that may be used to cause harm.

Emma, thanks for the hug and for the kind words. How are you doing today?

Pomegranate 11-04-2008 08:36 PM

**** ****. Helen has overdosed and needs to go to A+E but won't go. DOES ANYONE have her home address or home telephone number???? Pllleaaase.

Detour. Derail 11-04-2008 08:58 PM

Emma she still isnt listening to me....she's refusing :crying:

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 09:01 PM

Oh God! Please say that someone can get her to go to A&E.

~*forever_broken*~ 11-04-2008 10:01 PM

G*d DAMN!!! Someone please keep us updated :crying:

*sends lots of love and warm thoughts across the continent and an ocean to Helen*

Pomegranate 11-04-2008 10:03 PM

I have spent nearly an hour on and off the phone to her and NHS direct and she still won't go. She is going to hate me for what I am about to do but I don't care and I am sorry if you think this is out of order any of you. I am going to send a message to her entire facebook friends asking one of them for her address because it is an emergency. I have warned her but she still won't listen.

~*forever_broken*~ 11-04-2008 10:47 PM

*hugs Emma*

I think it's the only thing you can do hun... Please keep us updated

Pomegranate 11-04-2008 11:12 PM

I have messaged the people she has mentioned as her closest friends and a couple who have messaged her most recently, so about 7. I don't want to tell everyone on there, it doesn't feel right or fair to Helen. I am just worried about her, and stupidly I am now annoyed with her as well, which I know won't help but I just don't know what to do.

I offered to call the ambulance for her
I offered to tell her mum and drive up (she lives 100+ miles away or I would have just gone) and take her myself or meet her at hospital if she gave me the address. She gave me the mobile number for her counsellor and I even called her and she isn't answering! I don't know what else to do. She won't give me the address or even home telephone number.

She said Didi (12Vampire34) has her address so I have tried to add her to MSN to ask for it or get her to call an ambulance but she isn't online either and I can't find her address anywhere online and her college was shut when I called and is until monday so they can't even call an ambulance.

I don't know what to do. She keeps texting me saying she feels thirsty and light headed and I cant think of any other way to help. She is adamant she isn't going to hospital. But why text Alexx and I if she doesn't want help???

Detour. Derail 11-04-2008 11:21 PM

at least shes still texting you :blink:
I'm scared and worried about her.
:crying:

Pomegranate 11-04-2008 11:22 PM

she isn't any more hun and she isn't answering her phone either. Last text was nearly an hour ago :(

~*forever_broken*~ 11-04-2008 11:23 PM

*hugs*
Because she really does want it hunni... That's why she's given you all these loopholes... But she's scared...
*sigh* I'm sorry hun, it's scary and it's hard and I wish I could offer more...

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 11:27 PM

Do you know if she has taken enough of something to cause definite and permanent damage?
She obviously does want help if she has been in contact with you both and comes here so frequently for support.
Can you just keep her talking? Maybe the more you speak with her, the more she'll consider hospital...

Pomegranate 11-04-2008 11:33 PM

I know what she has taken and how much so I called NHS direct and they said she needed to go to hospital. I asked if he was sure and he said 'yes' like it was the most stupid question he ever heard so I think she really does need to go. I tried to keep her talking and then when had to go home, texting but she has stopped replying to Alexx and my texts and isn't answering her phone. It's just ringing and ringing.

The only plus is that her mum should be home now so she is not in the house by herself. Hopefully she will notice something is wrong and insist on medical help. I don't know what else to do now but wait and I hate that. I just PM'd the mods too just in case they have any sort of procedure for dealing with this sort of thing. Long shot I know but am now completely out of options that I can see.

*hugs everyone*

Alexx are you alright hun? *sends special hugs*

chocostashchick 11-04-2008 11:35 PM

oh dear
Helen i hope you are okay honey
the truth is that she knows what she needs to do to be safe and get help
you have done all you can and she has all the info and knows what to do and nobody can do any more
she is the only one who can take the next step
she is the only one who can call an ambulance or get to hosp
all we can do is hope and encourage her
it is in her hands now
you can't help somebody who doesn't accept it - i just hope she accepts it soon

Helen you know what you need to do and i hope you can do it
you have so many people who care
please call and get to hosp

Sugar and Spice 11-04-2008 11:36 PM

As far as I can see you have done what you can for the moment. We'll just have to hope that her mum does notice...

*gets fidgetty and runs in to the padded wall, falls over and does it again...and again*

Detour. Derail 11-04-2008 11:51 PM

I'm feeling crappy...
and...now dad is blaming me for things that arent my fault...:/

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 12:01 AM

Sorry to hear that Alexx, it really sucks when people blame you for things like that *sends you warm hugs*

chocostashchick 12-04-2008 12:03 AM

Alexx come have a purple lolly in the Denial Tent and rest for a bit
these things are not your fault and maybe your Dad is just lashing out and blaming you because he wants somebody to blame? but it isn't your fault and take solace in the fact that he is just wrong and it isn't you it's him
i'm sorry hun
xxxooo

Detour. Derail 12-04-2008 12:07 AM

*takes lollypop and sits down*
*bursts into tears*

This...will sound stupid...but...can I have a hug?:-(

Ive had a horrible day....horrible lesson (about parental/child attachment-something I never had) and im really worried about Helen and Jess and exams and loads of other stuff

Please?:-(

Detour. Derail 12-04-2008 12:09 AM

this isnt real.
this isnt real.
this isnt real.
its a dream.
a horrible horrible dream.
it has to be :crying:.

Jetforce 12-04-2008 12:10 AM

**hugs alexx tightly**

Hows helen doing so far? Is she ok?

*jem sends well wishes to Helen* xxx

~*forever_broken*~ 12-04-2008 12:32 AM

*snuggles Alexx, grabs a lolly, and sits in the denial tent...waiting...*

Detour. Derail 12-04-2008 01:11 AM

*whimpers*
I feel really pathetic

~*forever_broken*~ 12-04-2008 01:22 AM

*snuggles Alexx*
Why sweetie?

chocostashchick 12-04-2008 01:31 AM

*gives Alexx massive massive hugs*
honey i am sorry
you need a dose of Denial Tentness and take it one thing at a time and it will be okay
*sits with her lolly next to Alyssa and Alexx*
*hugs Jeremy* hope you are okay hun

*sends good thoughts to Helen*

Emma and Carol and Chloe how are you ladies?

Detour. Derail 12-04-2008 01:35 AM

i dunno...I just feel like I cant do anything right....
I cant help people...
I dont have anything specail about me...
I just feel like a shell

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 01:53 AM

*hugs Alexx, Ally, Jeremy, Callie, Emma and Helen*

Alexx, you are a wonderful person who cares for and supports people in need. That is what makes you special.

Callie, I've got my emotions in check and under control so I'm alright. Had a bit of an episode earlier, but am just concentrating on other things really. How are you?

Pomegranate 12-04-2008 01:54 AM

Alexx you can help people, you have helped me on here loads and Helen is always saying how much you help her, I am sure lots of people on here are the same. And there is LOADS....Stupidly loads special about you! You are kind, caring, pretty (i saw your profile pick ;) ), and thats just a few of what I have picked up from an online forum in a couple of weeks! ...........AND you have a cool manchester accent!

*send you a billion gazillion million trillion cool denial tent purple snuggly hugs*

*hugs everyone else too*

Just got a text from Helen, well two, she went to sleep and woke up throwing up and keeps getting shaking fits. Told her again to go to hospital via text but cant ring as she says she can't talk cos of being sick :( Suppose at least it is getting some of it out her system. Said if she really wasn't going to drink loads of water, let herself be sick and sleep in recovery style position. Is that about right?? I don't know. :crying:

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 02:02 AM

It's a good sign that you have heard from her. Better than not hearing at all. She sounds as if she really needs the hospital though. If she absolutely will not go then what you have suggested ^ with drinking water, vomiting and sleeping in the recovery position is the next best thing.

*hugs Emma* how are you holding up?

Detour. Derail 12-04-2008 02:02 AM

It sounds about right...espeacially sleeping in the recovery position. i hope she'll be ok :crying:
she text be a few minutes ago saying "I hope you're not too worried about me"
I am...I'm incredibly worried about her :(
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Lol @ the Manchester accent comment. I like your accent :tongue2: although I cant place it hehe :]

Thanks for all your support guys...
sorry to be such a pain...especially when theres more important things going on...
I think I might go to bed...try sleep off this mood :-(
*big huggles for everyone*
*curls up in a corner of the Denial Tent*

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 02:09 AM

*hunts about for Alexx, finds her and squishes her*
That's not true! Yes, it is a difficult and worrying time for us all, but no one is more important (or less important, for that matter) than anyone else. We all deserve support when we need it.

Pomegranate 12-04-2008 02:18 AM

Bed sounds like it may be a good idea Alexx hun. I will text you if/as soon as I hear anything else from Helen. Carole is right, Helen is worrying but you deserve support too *hugs*

Lol and I think my accent is a southern accent- I'm from Berkshire so about 40 minutes outside London (and I believe about 5 minutes down the road from you Carole if memory serves correct lol)

----------------------

I am alright I think....I have calmed down a lot since earlier. I dunno, I guess i am sort of annoyed with Helen but at the same time feeling guilty for not being able to help, for not making her tell me before, and for not being able to get her to go to a+e. And then it is all underlined by just me being in a generally bad mood anyway lol.

Sorry to whine, how's everyone else?

Carole? Callie? Ally? Chloe? Jeremy?

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 02:28 AM

Yes, when at home, I am about 10 mins away from Windsor :)
Emma, you are not whining. You just have stuff you need to get off your chest *hugs*

I'm trying to ignore some of the things that run through my mind and I actually think I'm winning. Consequently, I couldn't tell you how I am feeling though. But tbh I'd rather have a bit of time where my head is fairly level and not be able to describe how I feel as opposed to having my mind in complete chaos and being able to write pages about how I feel...Ach, I'm blabbering!

Pomegranate 12-04-2008 02:34 AM

lol no your not, makes perfect sense Carole :) Glad you are sort of feeling ok anyway...beats feeling bad *hugs* ( oh and I actually live Bracknell side of Binfield now but since nobody has heard of either I just leave it at Windsor!)

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 02:37 AM

I know Bracknell...I live there!! lol. The Binfield area's nice if my memory serves me correctly (I very rarely venture that way tbh)

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 03:22 AM

*rubs eyes*
God, I should really get some sleep. Problem is, despite how tired I am, I'm not sleepy >.< (that smiley thing makes me giggle! lol)

chocostashchick 12-04-2008 04:00 AM

Carole have some sleepytime tea or something and curl up in the Denial Tent and get some rest you need to sleep! Emma, you too! now get into that corner of the Denial Tent and curl up next to miss Alexx and off to bed with the lot of you!

*tucks you all in*


Helen honey i hope you call the hosp but if not yes sleep in the recovery position and keep hydrating and be safe

Sugar and Spice 12-04-2008 04:06 AM

I'll curl up in a corner with my pillows and a book. That'll help, I hope :)
Goodnight RYL, hope you are all keeping safe x

effervescence 12-04-2008 04:10 AM

hey guys.
how is helen? have you heard any more?
you have done all you can and more emma, i can understand you being annoyed at her and of course thats just cos you're worried. how are you?
how is everyone?
carole hope you're getting some sleep.
callie? how art thou?
my exam was awful. i should have beeb able to do it, but my went went a bit mad and i wrote all kinds of stupid things i shoudn't have. :( very depressed, and just had a thought, if i did anything bad, nobody would ever know what had happened to me....


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