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*hides* and crys.
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*hands Jill a tissue and Hugs*
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ugh!!!! Damn it I really want to cut, feeling very stressed.stuck in a bloody car for 3 and a
Half hours. Argh just shoot me now. Please |
*updated r/v thread twice this morning... took forever because I was at the front desk for an hour so I forgot some of what I was going to say and had to try to finish it all when I got back... then added another too it. Might have all the info there now.
*hugs everyone and goes off to hide* |
I read your R/V Thread Crimson *Huggles*
EDIT , MY R/V thread , just repeating myself now . I think . it's not brilliant writing , sorry http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...80#post2335180 |
Hi, can I come in, is there still room?
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There's always room Shannon. But I warn you we're hug-happy people here so if you don't like hugs, speak now or forever hold your peace :D
I'd give a tour of our ward but I'm not up for it right now. *hugs Mark and heads off to read his r/v* |
Thanks, I like hugs, Its okay, I will find my way around here.
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Hi Shannon! I'm Laura *offers hugs* <-- Crimson warned you lol. Its okay if you don't like hugs, if not *waves*
*hugs Crimson* I read your r/v thread. I'm sorry that D was not very excited about the vacation, that can really put a damper on things. And those voices are a little concerning, but you aren't crazy. How are you feeling this afternoon? *hugs mark* I'm sorry your SW "forgot" about you. Thats horrible. Glad that they remembered now though. I read your r/v thread too... And that sucks that he said that you should be able to will yourself out of SI. My ex used to say somewhat of the same thing to me, he would say "If my mom can get herself out of alcohol abuse then you can stop yourself from SI"... and it always made me mad b/c its really not the same thing. *hugs jill* i'm sorry you are so triggered and stuck in a car. I wish i had some suggestions, but its hard to find distractions while in a car. Maybe try the 15 minute game? *hugs april* Yes, naps are always a good idea, unless they turn into what i call "afternoon comas" lol. I'm sorry that you've been getting up so early lately. And don't feel stupid about things. You definitely can look at it as a learning experience, even though its hard to do that sometimes. Oh and I might PM you later this afternoon or tomorrow. Things haven't been great with me, but I'm surviving i suppose. I just don't like to type it all out here sometimes b/c it feels selfish... and like many would think i am blowing my thoughts out of proportion or something... even though I know that you guys aren't like that in here. Stupid, i know. *hugs jet* thanks for popping in to say hi! *hugs julie, heather, oliver, and lia* Supposed to have a movie night tonight with a couple of friends... Don't know if I really want to though, even though I HAVE to b/c people want to use my big TV. I feel weird with that group of people now though. There is so much dramatic history there now with my ex and other things getting blown out of proportion that.. oh i don't know... I guess i feel like i really need to watch what i say, so it makes me even more anxious as i go over every single detail in my head and how it could be construed as something "mean" or whatever. |
Hi Laura *accepts hug* I am sure tonight will be fine for you.
I am just going to curl up in a corner and cry for now, I will see you guys later. |
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Trying to distract myself with a movie. I keep stop-starting. I'm meeting my friend Shaun who I haven't heard of since Christmas day when he phoned, tommorow . Well back to the movie , I will finish it tonight , 104 minutes of concentration broken into bitesize peices . Oh and Welcome Shannon *Hugs* |
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Today I just want to hide and get the day over with. But I'm not really upset about it anymore. I think eventually in the next 6 months I can get him to pick his own places and dress up for dinner (rather than complain that I'm supposed to be the pretty one since I'm the girl *rolls eyes*). I've started planning a trip to Japan for April of 2012. I figure if I find out how much it'd cost to go and how much passports are then find things I'd want to do (like eat fugu and walk through the gardens and visit a temple) maybe David will look up what he wants to do and we can actually go... maybe even with the kids (excepting the fugu part). Soooooooooo glad it's Friday. |
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Movie over,
I made it through without the frustration boiling over , just I'm Shaking , but sometimes the meds make that happen. But this isn't Lithium shakes. anyhoo I am going to try and sleep , I HOPE not to many problems there. Night Night :) |
thanks for the support, everyone... and red sky, i'm sorry that you understand, but glad too... sometimes it feels like i am super alone here in this life. even though i'm married and all i still feel alone at times... :( no fault on jarrod's part, just me being stupid.
mark, how are you doing? what movie are you watching? *cuddles* oh and when i went to check your r/v thread the last time it didn't show that you'd updated it? so i'll check again. *cuddles laura* i hope that your movie night goes okay and that you don't have the replaying going on too badly in your head. :( i hate it when that happens... a friend of mine called it something clever but sadly i forget what she called it. blah. *hugs shannon if okay* welcome, welcome. :) i'm april. always glad to see new people about!! *cuddles crimson* ooh a trip to japan, sounds lovely. oh, and i'll read your r/v too, in a bit... am not feeling the best at the moment so will try to do what i can... *cuddles everyone else she's missed, sorry!!* i'm so exhausted... and anxious... and i really, really want to cut. The following content has been hidden - Reason : si trig
i feel like such a failure. :'( don't care anymore. just want to give up. :'( |
g'night mark... *tucks you into your ward bed* :) <3 you, big bro. :)
*hides in a hole in the warren for awhile* |
Scarlet-I know it feels like the right thing to give up...I'm really close myself but you can do this-Big hugs...PM if you wanna talk about it honey. Hope you feel much better soon. x x
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P.s. It's not your fault you feel this way...you are not a failure at all...just like the rest of us in that you need a little support. x x
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Okay finally got here, after 3 hours in a bloody car, still feeling triggered not much I can do about it, I
Have no means to selfharm at all this weekend Which Is good, but possible bad, just going to Have to put on my happy face and pretend everthings okay great. |
3 Attachment(s)
cup cake anyone
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