Whaaaaaaat? :P

*throws ice cold water and runs off*

Matter fact, i love all the psych ward regulars

U know who u r :P

Mwah! lol

*hopes she isn't interrupting and hides in the corner* It's really annoying not being able to come on here during the evening! I'm feeling really anxious about tonight. I have to listen to people making a speech about me in front of lots of people. It's going to be scary. It'll all be lies anyway. I'm not a good person, I don't deserve the award.

*cuddles farawayfairy*

I bet ur a wonderful person :-) xxx

Thanks, that means a lot but I really don't think I am. I'm scared of what they're going to say about me. What if they mention about why I was off school for a year? I don't want people knowing I was in a psychiatric hospital. I suppose at least I'll never see any of them again though.

Nah, they won't say that!!

they'll say stuff nice about u...for sure :-) just shout at them if they say nasty things about u...wait i'll shout at them for u :-D

hehe thanks :) Although to be honest I'm not sure whether I'd rather they said bad things. I find them easier to hear! I'd best be off now though.

okies

*waves* tc there

Seeing my partner tonight. Hoping things will go well, I miss him.

On my way out to a meeting. By way of a drive through psuedo-mexican place for lunch.

I'm wearing sandals for the first time this season.

Hey can i come and hide in a corner for a bit? Need a bit of chill time and dont know were to go lol.

Sure thing hun :)

I'm hiding in a corner too ;)

Hehe hiding but still being seen. Its werid i didnt think i would but i am feeling a bit safer for being here...

:P

I need support. I need to cry. Why can't it happen?

I think i might need to cry...i always stop myself for some reason and dont know why, it winds me up.

If you need support you can lean on me in my corner over here!

*hugs you both*

'm around, but busy writing essays and whatnot so not talking much, but if you wanna talk, nudge me :)

xxx

Essays are important I am glad mine are over with for now...but i get results next week so could be a very down or very happy time...or just apathetic! Might still be in my corner then but holding an envolope.

not happy to still be here. not even a little bit. *cries* i'm scaring myslf.

*locks self in cupboard*

Lucky the cupboard is near the corner! If you want to stay in and talk or come out i am here or PM!

*goes to corners and cupboards and gives hugs to everyone there*
*goes outside to the virtual psych ward's virtual camp fire and starts making noodles in chicken sauce for everyone.*

Nooodles? Chicken sause? YUMMY susan :]

*huggles everyone*

-sighs- Can I have a good day?

Nothing fancy. dump noodles and sauce mix from packet into sauce pan. add water. simmer until noodles good texture.
more like noodles in chicken flavor salt sauce. I hate to cook!

Packet noodles and chicken sauce is the kind of cooking I like!

*snuggles for everyone*

Hopefully tomorrow will be good for you Helen :)

Urgh, I'm tired, but not sleepy-tired. As in I'm shattered but still I can't sleep if that makes sense?

I did just get a really great email from one of my best friends who's been in Hondouras since April, and who I'm not going to see until Christmas at the earliest because she's coming back while I'm out of the country in October. Been missing her like crazy recently, but she always seems to know when to email/phone/whatever, and I feel better after it.

*huggles everyone too*

Susan, sounds bit like super noodles =p

Ohhh I'm possibly meeting yet another RYL member soon and before that I'm maybe going to one/two RYL meets :S I'm gonna be pooooor this summer =\

Sounds like you're going to have a fun-filled summer.... even if you have no money by the end of it...

Hmmmm yes I think so too.

But one needs money to fund her summer and for uni :P

Hahahaaha I need another job =]

Tis a problem indeed. I have the same problem actually :s partly why I'm not doing much this summer...

Hmm, yeah getting a job sounds like a good idea.

Super noodles? Is that what is called Mr.Noodle in Canada? Ramen noodles in the US? Plastic packet of crunchy dry noodles that look kinda like wavy hair. Put in boiling water for 3 minutes, then add seasoning packet? Really inexpensive, jokes about it inexpensive?

I want to be unconcious. Have drunk the best part of two bottles of wine to make this happen but not working. I have to go and get confirmation of the fact I have failed an exam and consequently my entire first year of university tomorrow. Not looking forward to it at all. My Dad is going to go mental. He already said if I have failed anything then I am getting a job and moving out. Do I look ****ing stable enough to be sorting all that out? No! So, yeah, great.

*hugs you* sorry don't have much to say at the moment... *more hugs*

Susan - Yeah, that's the sort of thing :)

*cuddles emma*

U never know wat might happen..u might pass the subjects...well fingers crossed u do

Don't drink till ur pass out...that's no good to ur liver and to urself the next day..u'll probably feel even worse :-(

do tc there emma...xx

be safe em! Please?


*blows up cupbard whilst still inside* that solves my problems

Yeouch. Jess, the splinters.

Jobs, I've heard of those. I've had my current one since August 2003. The boss is a moody weirdo though. Y'all do know i'm self employed.

It will give me time to look for 10 for $1.00 for ramen noodles/super noodles

It's stupid really. I'm back from uni now, and yet I miss everyone down here more than I did when I was up there. Add to that the fact that I miss everyone from uni, and the fact that half of my friends are currently in various places in America and completely out of contact for a month from last Saturday and you get where I am right about now.
I want to go out and get horrendously drunk, but I've stopped drinking alcohol now, since I joined AA and all that.
But anyways, missing people, just want a hug from my best friend but she's on the other side of the country to me, and neither of us can afford to travel. I know I can talk to her on the phone and on facebook and everything, but... it's not the same, is it?

Like she was there for me when I almost got stabbed, paid for the train to London, met me at the station and made sure there were lots of people I knew around me so I didn't feel as unsafe as I would have done. It was almost as if she knew something was going on, because she phoned me while it was happening, but of course I couldn't answer. Kept phoning until she got an answer though. That answer being me having a major panic attack down the phone at her.

Sorry, major essay there. I could go on, but I sense it's time to stop.

oh god oh god oh god, I want to cut so bad :crying:

(I know I'm the last one to post...sorry for posting again already :crying: )

Went downstairs just now and there was a note from my mother asking if I could unload the washer, and it pushed me over the edge. Like... anger consumed me for a minute. I wanted to destroy everything in sight. I didn't. I did destroy a book though. And to me... books are the most important thing in my life. I won't let a spine get creased if I can help it, but... I destroyed an entire book. I feel more guilty about that than I would if I'd cut.

Like, if I'd allowed myself to cut, the book would be fine... I dunno...

still wanna cut. want to hit a vein... help? No-one's around, doesn't matter. *is fine* look, new mask. :crying: :crying: :crying: <<< oh, how I wish I could cry.

*hugs*


hahahahahahaha i'm a tad tired of this. really really tired of this.'

can i just let go now? i on't need to cut... just straight to bye bye

bye? please....

*hugs* hang on in there sweetie. It'll get better eventually... honest.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Why the hell can't I follow my own advice damnit!!!

*gives you book with your own advice* read that and you'll know what to do!


I... don't want to follow my own advice. I don't want to follow anyones advce. i want... to be gone.

*hugs you* what's happening sweetie?

I'm here, PM me if you need. Please?

*reads book full of own advice* thanks sweetie :)

i dint want to be her anymore. i dont want... anything. just otbe gone.

I hate trying to get a job man, feels like too hard sometimes.

Hopefully Emma you won't have faled anything and you've done much better than you think sweetheart. You know we believe in you. x

Hana, Jess, *snuggles* Keep fighting? Please?

*cuddles Auburn Shadow and <alive>*

Please don't give up both of you *hugs*

*cuddles hana and jess*

Hana, I didn't know you were in AA. Me too. Keep up the good work sister in sobriety!

AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH

I PASSED, I FRIGGIN PASSED!!!! Ok, this may seem small but I PASSED my first year at uni! I genuinely thought I had failed, I was looking at alternative unis/courses/jobs etc etc. BUT I PASSED!!!!!!!!! YYYYYAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!

I TOLD YOU EMMA =D

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

*jumps around very happy*

**** ****.

I was tidying up, went to move two glasses, they both fell to the floor, one smashed and caught me, instead of cleaning it up....I made it slightly worse. WTF was I thinking? Ah well slip ups happen.....3 weeks isn't getting thrown away.

I wanted to cry. I ALWAYS want to cry when I smash a plate or whatever, still upsets me to this day :S Pathtic Helen.

*Checks back in - drags doona & a cuppa hot choclate over to the corner*

Yeah, only recently joined, but it's helping so much. Really.

Had a nap (for 3 hours....?) earlier. Kinda helped slightly but... I don't really feel much better. I wish it was like it used to be, seeing them all every day, but then I wouldn't know the guys in Wycombe so.... I dunno, I just hate not seeing anyone.

-----------------------------------------------

Well done Emma! That's great! *huge hugs*

Helen, I feel exactly the same when I smash a plate, glass or whatever. Slip ups do happen, sweetie, and we've just got to push past them and just do the best we can. Take care of it though, yeah?

*hugs decayed_elegance* sup sweetie?

Do you mean High Wycombe?? =D If not then my bad hehee. Only when me & Emma were driving down to Kent, we were near London and there's this place I regonise so much, it's just before High Wycombe (which is before London) and it only turns out BOTH me & Emma used to live there around the same time. Spoooooooooooooky or what? =)

Hehe, yeah I did indeed mean High Wycombe. Am at uni there :) Spooky indeed! Small world, much?