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-   -   Beyond repair. (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=248931)

Auror. 09-09-2019 04:08 PM

Do you have your phone? How are you posting to here?

one_step_closer 09-09-2019 04:08 PM

I'm glad you managed to speak to a nurse and things seem to have been planned. Do you have games you can play on your phone or use the F&D board here?

chinahorse 09-09-2019 04:11 PM

I have my phone and charger thank god.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 04:11 PM

I have such a headache from this nightmare.

Auror. 09-09-2019 04:19 PM

If you have your phone you could maybe listen to music, watch something on youtube, or play some games? Or try to sleep, since I imagine you haven't gotten much sleep lately. If someone is still watching you and you try to sleep, maybe mention that if the nurse comes to help you do anything you want to be woken up.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 04:31 PM

If I sleep they write things about me.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 04:32 PM

I am very tired though.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 04:39 PM

I am still waiting. Literally cleaning a bed is more important than me.

Auror. 09-09-2019 04:41 PM

They're probably required to write things about you if you're on constant observation, asleep or awake. It usually means every 10-15 minutes they write down what you are doing no matter what. So sleeping doesn't change that, it just gives them something slightly different to write down.

I've seen the sheets before, it's usually just things like, "awake and alert" or "sitting in bed" or "sleeping." It's not any type of weird messages. You could maybe even ask to see what they write down if you're worried, or ask them to explain to you what they're writing and why.

Cleaning a bed might be because they need to admit a new patient to the ward and clear out a spot in A&E. Not to imply you aren't important, but it might be more of a life threatening situation to need a bed in A&E free. You're on a medical ward right? Unfortunately they do still have a level of triage there. I know that sucks though.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 06:20 PM

Just shredded the MH notes. And am waiting by the door. I'm going home to feed Bertie.

EyelinerAndCigarettes 09-09-2019 06:56 PM

Are you okay now, Lillie?

Sending love.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 07:06 PM

Am in serious pain but they won't give me painkillers. So I took my own and caused a massive thing. I've been in pain since the moment I got here and they haven't sorted it or listened to me when I've told them several times.

EyelinerAndCigarettes 09-09-2019 07:10 PM

I'm so sorry, is your mum coming to see you soon, could she advocate for you?

chinahorse 09-09-2019 07:14 PM

Mum isn't coming until tomorrow. I'm not staying another night.

The rmn lied to get me away from the door. Said she would get my wound sorted and see what was going on with having an assessment. But I've already had an assessment. I'm not telling yet another person.

Juella 09-09-2019 08:00 PM

I'm sorry things are so tough now. Why aren't you staying another night?

It sucks that rmn lied to you. They shouldn't have done that, they should've approach it in a more professional manner.

chinahorse 09-09-2019 08:44 PM

They said I have to stay. They haven't even got me painkillers and I've been asking for hours.

The rmn wrote more notes for the stalker. So I'm not safe here which is why I need to go. And I want to see bertie and Alice wants to play with him too. That makes her happy.

Juella 09-09-2019 08:56 PM

Oh, it must be really hard to deal with all the pain :( However, maybe if you stay, they will eventually help you.

Please, hang on in there. I don't have much helpful things to say, but I hope things will get better for you soon.

chinahorse 10-09-2019 07:42 AM

Mum was mean last night. She said I was lying. Making it up. I was difficult and nasty.

EyelinerAndCigarettes 10-09-2019 09:07 AM

I'm sorry about your mum, that must have been very difficult. Do you want to talk about what happened?

chinahorse 10-09-2019 12:27 PM

I want to see bertie. I called her to check bertie. She said I was nasty. I really want to see bertie.

one_step_closer 10-09-2019 07:19 PM

I'm sorry your Mum isn't being supportive. I know it's hard being away from a pet but you'll be able to give him lots of cuddles and play time when you're doing better. I'm sure both you and Bertie will be much more content when you're feeling settled.

How has your day been?

Eska 11-09-2019 12:05 PM

How are you doing, Lillie? Did you get to see plastics yesterday?

EyelinerAndCigarettes 11-09-2019 01:33 PM

Thinking of you.

one_step_closer 11-09-2019 04:16 PM

How are things Lillie? I hope you're alight.

tiptoes 12-09-2019 08:04 AM

Thinking of you x

chinahorse 12-09-2019 08:47 AM

I'm going to be late for work.

They took me off the street in a van. Like a prisoner. I'm in Bristol. I'm not ill. I want to see Bertie. I'm going to be late for work.

Pi.R^2 12-09-2019 10:56 AM

Where are you now?

tamobhuuta 12-09-2019 12:30 PM

Your health and safety are more important than work right now. Are you back in hospital?

one_step_closer 12-09-2019 03:54 PM

You're not a prisoner, I'm sorry if you feel like one. I hope people are treating you well and giving you what you need, even if right now you don't think you need treatment.

chinahorse 14-09-2019 03:57 AM

Bristol. In prison . Priory.

Nothing. No one. Alone. No jumper.

Improvement. Show signs. Going to shower. Change sheets. Improvement. Morning. Improvement.

EyelinerAndCigarettes 14-09-2019 04:04 AM

Thinking of you sweetie

nonperson 14-09-2019 09:43 AM

I hope things are improving. Prison implies you've done something criminally wrong which I know you haven't, but a section is an intervention to keep you safe and that is the help you need right now.

Can anyone visit and bring you a jumper and some more stuff?

chinahorse 14-09-2019 06:11 PM

There's nothing wrong with me. There really isn't.
Mums talking about putting Bertie in a cattery and I'm upset. She did bring me more clothes today and I'm interacting more.

tamobhuuta 14-09-2019 06:15 PM

Have they explained why you have been sectioned? Is it a 2 or a 3? I'm glad you're able to interact a little more.

Eska 14-09-2019 06:40 PM

If we go back a week or two things were very very difficult and you were reaching out to lots of people for help - it definitely didn't sound like things were ok then. What's changed now that means that now you can say that nothing is wrong?

I'm glad you have more clothes and that you're interacting more. Thinking of you lovely.

chinahorse 14-09-2019 07:18 PM

I asked and they said for assessment. It's a section 2.

I don't know what's changed.

not_so_insig 14-09-2019 07:38 PM

Why are you upset about Bertie being in a cattery? Most cats adjust fine and he will have someone checking on him regularly. Some catteries have people who are paid to play with them and some post photos on Facebook if they have permission. He will get checked on at least twice a day and generally have more attention than if he were at your home with your mum just doing the essentials. My late cat was always nervous of strangers and hated being out of the home but she was always happy in a cattery and loved the people there. Your mum is doing it with Bertie's welfare in mind.

one_step_closer 15-09-2019 10:41 AM

You can get through this. <3

Eska 16-09-2019 04:52 PM

Thinking of you lovely. How are things going now?

Indigo. 17-09-2019 09:59 AM

Thinking of you Lillie. You can and will get through this X

chinahorse 17-09-2019 10:21 PM

Had a terrible day. My leg will take a minimum of 4 months to heal. I absconded from general hospital. Met a very nice police man whose car I had every opportunity to steal and didnt. Came back and poured a kettle over my hand which they haven't even got a dr to look at. Had a diasterous ward round where the consultant said being here isn't helpful or useful for me and there is no plan but she won't discharge me.

I did speak to an advocate though. So I'm hoping for some clarity tomorrow or I will start appealing the section.

Fire Fly 17-09-2019 10:28 PM

Lillie, did they suggest what could be helpful? I’m guessing the priory has a lot of groups and things to keep occupied? Did they look at your meds.

What would you like to happen when you go back to your mum? You speak you even shout for help and honestly I can’t think of anyone who has been more let down than you but have you got any suggestion as to what you would find helpful?

So at the Cassel what was beneficial there as I know it didn’t help but there must of been something however little.

chinahorse 18-09-2019 02:17 AM

There are no groups. No meds changes either.

I would like to go back to plymouth immediately.

It was good to have support with everyday things at the Cassel.

Fire Fly 18-09-2019 04:35 AM

Is that where your mum is? Have you asked for a change? There’s lots of patient in the area I work who try clozapine for eupd if that helps at all. It’s meant to help with self harm and impulses.

What do you think they could do?

one_step_closer 18-09-2019 03:10 PM

I don't have many words but I'm glad you spoke to an advocate and I hope they can help you figure out what you need and express those needs.

chinahorse 18-09-2019 07:50 PM

I'm so tired of this. Found out today I will probably be here at least another week. With no plan. No treatment and no purpose.

one_step_closer 19-09-2019 12:49 PM

What would you like to happen over the week, if you take not being there out of the equation?

chinahorse 19-09-2019 06:34 PM

I just give up. Shut up. What's the point anymore. Nothing I say is heard.

Pomegranate 19-09-2019 07:29 PM

What do you feel isn’t being heard? One step closer offered support and you bit at her, unfairly. It sounds like they can hear how much you’re struggling cos otherwise they’d just discharge you surely?

Fire Fly 20-09-2019 12:17 PM

What do you want from this thread? We can hear how distressed you are but people are trying to support you and you’re not really wanting to do things to help. People are trying. What do you want the ward to do? What have they said...

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