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*hugs emma*
*hugs chloe* Yeah, it is the outside of our front door. But the door opens inward. I don't know but what they won't do the stuff around the edge of the door too. Our next door neighbor has a key to our place but that doesn't keep our cat safe. Oh well, don't have to solve it tonight. |
*snuggles*
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*cuddles chloe again*
U know where to find me if u need to chat xx |
Hi everyone.
Feeling a lot better today. Beth isn't being violent and I feel good enough to tackle her if she became aggressive. Going out for lunch with my dad which I'm loooking forward to. Hope everyone's doing okay xxxxxxx |
shhh i'm away and i want to cut... and no one is watching me... shhh don't tell anyone :(
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I'm about the same as i have been every morning this week. If I can't go back to bed, please pass the diet pepsi.
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Been feeling **** today. Am supposed to be going to a party tonight that i have been excited about for a bit now but was feeling aprehensive, then my friend who I was going to give a lift to (fancy dress and we where going as a pair) is ill and cant go so i feel even worse and dont want to go now either.
Also the friend i havent seen for just over two weeks and hasnt answered my a few messages i have sent him will be there and i dunno if i want to see him and find out that he hates me now. Now ive gone and taken up loads of room here and feel an idiot about it! sombody please take my negative thoughts away... |
Looks like i scared everyone off. Sorry.
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You didn't scare me off. Sorry you're not looking forward to the party, will it matter much if you don't go?
alive (sorry, what's your name?) Have you managed to resist the urges? Susan, did you manage to get back to sleep? And how have you been feeling each morning? Love to all xxx |
Its the image more then anything, i have seemed excited about it for a while and people will wonder why i didnt go so i will just end up lying to people (not many people know of how i feel) not long left to decied.
*puts out a pile of blankets and take one* |
Quote:
It'll make me feel good :D And I dont think you offended anyone....we just all went to bed :P (damn time difference :/) |
Cause i stayed up till 1:30 Monday morning, i've kinda been drag tail tired this week. I usually go to bed around 10 or 11. So diet pepsi is my caffeine of choice.
Got a client coming in about 40 minutes. he says it is an emergency and that he just needs two buttons sewn on. okay. he has the buttons. however, since he is a strange to me man, i'll keep the door between the front room of my house and the rest of it closed, and will tuck a sharp pair of scissors in my pocket. He may not like what I charge though. Oh well, my needle, my thread, my thread clippers. my expertise. skipped lunch with my sponsor and the little old ladies today. one of the little old ladies just needs too much care. since that seems to be the underlying issue that caused me to be so obnoxious on tuesday, i just side stepped it for now. I'm starting to chip away at the mess. |
*sits in her corner, arms wrapped around knees, and rocks back and forth ever so slightly*
Baddaybaddaybaddaybaddaybaddaybaddaybadday *makes a pot of tea and leaves it in the middle of the room for everyone else, then retreats to her corner with her cup of tea and continues to rock* |
*wraps a blanket around Ally*
Client Canceled. Made an appointment to have my hair trimmed. Am thinking about having two inches chopped off, likely will ask for just one. Got a bit of housework done. How...weird...unusual. I'm tired of living in a cat barf stained health hazard. |
Ooh Susan I'll come do your bookcases =) It'd make me feel a bit better.
Get two, have a change =) Mine needs cutting too, might get mum to trim it cos I'm too lazy/skint to get a real hairdresser to mess with it. *takes tea* What's up hun? I can listen if you need someone...probably won't be good for advice though I'm afraid, mind's a mess tonight... |
please God...don't let me wake up tomorrow...
Please >.< |
^ I know that feeling.
*squishes* what's wrong hun? |
still here.
still alive. great isn't it. |
^ yeah it is. i hope you see that soon hun *hugs*
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*cries*
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*holds chloe whilst she cries*
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Whats up Alexx hun? *huggles you*
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Just feeling depressed-awful and then a bad day besides.
Thanks guys. *makes more tea* It almost makes things better. |
Caution: bragging alert
*cuddles chloe*
*cuddles alexx* *cuddles ally* Two inches will leave it swinging just above my shoulders I think. A lot of the people I know say that if they had my hair they'd let it grow as long as it would go. This is where i'm bragging...My hair is my best feature x 2. Thick, fine, looks like spun gold. Gold is heavy! For every inch past my shoulders, it feels five pounds heavier. So likely 1.5 inches anyway, cause it got so beat up on our road trip a few weeks ago. I'm off to bed soon, even though it is still light out. |
Good morning. Feeling alright this morning, stronger.
Wish I didn't wake up so early though >.< |
Hello to all. I haven't been around for a while ...... things have been happening.
I've had 8 treatments of ECT now. Yes, electroconvulsive therapy. It does still exist. Up until today I've been feeling much better. Today I started feeling like I wanted to hurt myself again .... and I don't know why. I'm a bit scared that I'm going to act on the feelings, even though I know there's no real reason for them. I'm not quite sure what to do. Feeling really bad. Go back in on Wednesday for more ECT. Just want to scream aaghhhhhh. :sad: |
i was just reading up about ECT the other day! i'm glad it's been helping you so far, maybe the urge now are just a bump along the road.
my hair keeps falling out in massive amounts. on top of my trichotillomania, this is getting to be quite a problem. it's really upsetting actually. i envy you susan. |
had a great day today... now feel rather... ga blah. *chokes* ed issues all day. wanted to cut. almost threw myself in front of a train... shhh... i woul dike to die right now. thank you.
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Sorry Chloe, then I shouldn't have bragged.
Jess, please don't leave us. Hugs to everyone. |
*wanders back in*
Mm *curls up in a corner* Make it all go away... |
Is there anyway to make it all stop?? To give me a few hours rest from all the crud?? I want out!!
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Kahlia, don't we all wish there was a way to make it stop. Sometimes the only thing i can do is realize that it is there then ignore it. It is exhausting, fighting it, or even tuning it out.
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Ow Ow Ow.
Cant breath. I have a doctors appointment on Friday... I'm gonna get sent away again... "Go home and rest" I CANT "REST"!!! WHY ARENT YOU LISTENING?!?! I FALL ASLEEP AT INAPPROPRIATE TIMES BUT I CANT STAY ASLEEP!!! IM SCARED IM GONNA BE COOKING....FALL ASLEEP AND SET THE HOUSE ON FIRE!!! ID RATHER OD THAN FEEL THIS TIRED ANYMORE!!! ITS STARTING TO HURT PHYSICALLY!!! I swear...If he doesnt listen this time...im just gonna smack my head on his desk til he does SOMETHING |
can i stay in here a while. its nicer than the real world that sucks out there and you have to work out if you trust people.
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Of course :]
I'm Alexx *waves* You wanna talk hun? |
Welcome pez barbie.
My husband and I are so tired/lazy that we're just going to do a day long drive tomorrow. So today i've been catching up on sleep so we can get up early and go in the morning. |
no its okay susan i'm glad you have something to like about yourself :)
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I hate to hurt others feelings.
I'm off for dinner and bed. may be asleep before the sun goes down. oh yeah, speaking of sleep, i think this wednesday will have to be my last night of call forwarding. i'm already on the schedule, so won't back out. but it is just too much for me. the gent who schedules it already knows i odn't want to do it in august, when he phoned to remind me about this week, i'll let him know. |
*sighs* why is that when things are okay everything else sucks? why do I want to cut :'(
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Bad day today dunno why just is. Gotta go to work so big happy smiles *sigh*.
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*hugs Jess*
*hugs marc* Hang in there both of u!! |
thanks :) im just feeling fragile right now. i was be a nice person and a shoulder to cry on for one of the new guys at work and ive been told that a lot of what he said is lies which then made me wonder about the rest. i feel like such a mug.
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with my parents... cutting would be signing my own death warrant...
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*gives luce a box of tissues and my shoulder to cry on*
------------ Yep jess..it would be. Plz stay safe. Y don't u hang around ur sister for a bit to keep urself distracted? |
we're watching ncis with my parents right now. i wont cut...
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try n keep yourself distracted and safe hun xx
And thanks jetforce xx Its hard to work with the guy right now cos im sure he's laughing at me. |
smack him.... >.<
NCIS is good *nods* |
na i cant being the complete fool i am im worried about him still. and what if it is true then i would be the biggest bitch for doubting him. im sure it isnt true though its been one story after another and i just took it all in.
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Not a fool. *hugs* i understand.
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*smiles* Not a big fan of crime shows.....but glad u won't do anything silly there :-)
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