Getting deeper not better
Lately writing has gotten harder and harder. The only times I cant write is when im about to go though a really really bad time. Every time I try to get better I just cut deeper, and now my whole family is about to find out becuase we are goimg on a trip to cuba and I cant wear pants and sweaters the entire time. Im going to be with out my number 1 support this weekend for she has more import things to do then deal with me. However I dont know how im going to deal with this, I feel somthing big comming and I cant stop it. I cant hide my cuts and scars much longer and I cant be alive much longer.
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It sounds like you need some medical help, which is hard if you're hiding it from your family. Would it be such a bad thing if they found out?
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I get you don't want your family to find out. I felt the same 12 years ago when i first started self harming. I actively avoided going on holiday with my family and the thought of them finding out horrified me. But they did find out and in the end it was the only reason I stopped. This time round it is slightly different but sometimes it isn't as bad as you think it will be. I hope you get the help and support you need
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I cant let them find out they would send me off or use it aginst me in some way. My family hates me and they want me gone. |
What's happening with your family? Can you tell us some more?
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That's a lot to deal with. Are you still with your Grandmother? It sounds like there's a history of a lot of distress in your family. A lot is at stake. I can only imagine how frightening that might be.
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What's going on today lovely?
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