Thanks :-p

Thank you ;-)

5 WEEKS TIL I'M ON HOLIDAY :hop: :hop: :hop: :hop:

^ Lucky! Where you off to?

Katch, I've been on RYL for years hun. Just not vets, it's all new cos now I feel old enough =) and you all seem really lovely.

my mistake - i nearly asked you if you'd been on ryl for a while and then i thought how stupid i was coz it says at your signature Join date May 2008. Oh well - i try to use my brain but it gets quite a bit wrong. I've only just found the site - wish I'd found it years ago

Yeah sorry I'm a tad confusing - had to change my account. I've had quite a few - case of paranoia.
At least you have it now. I love the place. =)

*cuddles you all on the way to her corner for a nap*

Katch and Ku, sounds like y'all are having a good conversation :-D

Hana luv, Katch is right, we all have those times that we feel crap and don't know why. Guess it comes with the territory*snuggles*

*sets up camp in her corner to take her nap*

Aww have a good nap!
Yep, I'm just explaining my confusing-ness. I easily confuse.

Hey my lovely neice Ally, i know you have been having a rough time - i've been thining of you - sorry i haven't been here for you but i just couldn't be. I'm here now though so if you need anything over there in the corner let me know - meanwhile i am going to tuck you in safe and put some relaxing music on for you.

Dominican Republic :hop: :hop:

We just got back from our last vacation and here I've been planning the next one. We want to go back to one region of high mountains, and go in September when hopefully the snow has melted and the streams and rivers are low. It is a matter of if we can afford the petrol. That is why I wish I had more work.

I'm lazy today. Worrying about my 17 year old friend again. My cat is cranky. After being with my husband 24/7 for two weeks, I miss him.

cuddles all around.

*hugs susan lots*

Ahhhhhhhhh I should talk about me :S

*hides in her corner*

I'm feeling lost again. Maybe I should have gone to the fabric store this afternoon put in more cards and seen if they need a morning person. I don't know.

Where am I meant to be in this world? What am I meant to do? I'd always planned to be part of the work force. Being under employed is boring.

*drinking another bottle of champagne after the leftover half she drank earlier*

Tired. Don't give a ****. Done.

*pokes around for her 'across the pond drinking buddy'*
Emma, I MIIIISSSS you! :-( I hope you're doing alright sweetie.

Emma might be back tomorrow or if not, Friday, then we should be meeting up sometime between Sat-Tues :D

*snuggles Ally* What's wrong? xxxx

I feel too awake and scared to sleep :(

*sits in her corner and cries*
I was so close... About 1/2 an inch to the right and an inch up and I could have done it... I WOULD have done it...:crying: I can't decide whether or not I'm glad I wasn't cutting there, that all I got was a gaping cut (that SHOULD be stitched but will be butterflied instead) that didn't bleed like I would have preferred....
:crying:**** me:crying:

*snuggles Helen*
What's wrong luv?
*wraps you in a blanket and hands you some tea*

As for me... Just life sweetie... My future just looks black and empty and it's not been that way before (well, it has for a while but before I allowed this depression I had been fighting to take over...).

exams suck.
chemistry this morning. psychology tomorrow. meaning i have one evening to learn a whole semester's worth of psych. so not going to happen.

ally, im glad you didn't.
you never know what might happen in your life. but none of it could ever happen if you had done that. *hugs*

helen it sucks when you can't sleep. can you do some drawing or writing to help you relax?

*hugs*
Good luck with the exams.

Ally, I'm sorry I have no words for you, but I'm glad you didn't do it sweetie. Things can get better.

Helen, I know how you feel, try listening to some sort of relaxing music or something?

********************************cufk************fu ck********

Itdoesnthelpitdoesnthelpitdoesnthelpitdoesnthelpit doesnthelp

Cutting...
Drinking...

It. Just. Doesn't. Help.

*cowers in her corner and cries*

Sometimes I just wish I didn't care so much cause when something happens, I hurt. No word from my friend but that has started to happen so often that it is a sigh and a dull ache.

I really should use this time to do a few things for myself. Like take in the lining of my bathing suit top. Why does the entire clothing industry think that plus size women are buxom?

Nope, I want work so I can't think. But I don't have the energy.

I'm off to bed. I need a double dose of cuddle from my better half. Tomorrow i sleep on the sofa when calls from the county's aa number are forwarded to mine from 9pm to 6am.

Good luck Chloe, I'm sure you'll do fine!

*hugs Ally* Don't cower in your corner on your own hun. *Leaves you a teddy bear for when you get back*

Susan, I know it's hard when you're hurting because you care about other people but it just shows what a lovely person you are to be so worried.

*leaves hugs for everyone*

I feel totally useless :-(

So wanna give up everything rite now...ugh...

^ what's happened hun?

What happened?

Uh, the toaster works better when it is plugged in.

I think i'm going to treat myself to a nap this afternoon. I have no idea about how many calls I'll get tonight.

Still no word from my friend or her sister.

*snuggles Ally* I couldn't sleep because of having so many nightmares at the moment :crying:

Sure does suck, I'll have to try that, thanks :)

I should :-p

I've had nearly 12 hours sleep and look dead rough lol. I feel dead rough too tbh =\

*huge hugs* What happened sweetie?

How you feeling today Ally?

Hope you manage to get a nap in Susan and I hope you can manage to get in contact with your friend sometime soon. *hugs*

*hugs Helen* Hope you get a proper nightmare-free night's sleep soon, hun.

*hugs to anyone else who wants/needs"

--------------------------------------------
As for me, well, oh, I dunno what I feel anymore. It's all so complicated, but at least I'm getting somewhere with regards to what I'm doing at uni next year and stuff so it's a start I guess. I think I'm feeling slightly better than I did yesterday though...

Nothing happened today

Just feeling really useless and lacking energy to keep on fighting :-(

*cuddles everyone*
Ugh, got a massive hangover headache... And cuts made while drunk always hurt differently the next morning:pinch:

Susan, I hope you get a nap in this afternoon. You certainly deserve it.

Helen, I'm sorry sweetie, not being able to get a decent nights sleep is awful.

Hana, I'm sorry you're unsure as to how you're feeling... But I'm glad you think it may be a bit better.

Jeremy *snuggles her sheep* you and I are emailing atm. Please take care sweetie.

irkeninvader, thanks for the teddy :-D (anyone know the history behind the name of the 'teddy bear'?... Cause I do, lol)

Hey Ku, how goes it luv?

*retreats to her corner with her blanket, teddy bear, water, and first aid stuff and attempts a nap*

I know how that feels hun, but keep fighting and your motivation will come back. We'll help you fight.

I'm, well, that quote above sums it actually.
But oh well.
Hope your headache goes away soon! And make sure you look after your cuts.
*squishes*

No nap. Instead an appointment with my primary care physician to see about my sinuses which I think are related to my tooth ache since it got better when I took a decongestant.

I'm outa here, follow my husband to the dealership as he takes the suv in, then sale at a certain grocery store in my diet pepsi.

I know who the teddy bear is named after but Ally, please tell us the rest of the story.

Hugs all around.

*snuggles Ku*
Sorry to hear it luv... Please take care.

Thank God for modern medicine... Headaches already lessening.

lol alright Blondie-mom.
*sits by the denial tent campfire to tell her tale*
Rather short actually.
Theodore (Teddy) Roosevelt (26th president of the United States) was one of those guys who liked to hunt (I think especially big game). While on a hunting trip it had been arranged (as so often happens when rich, important people hunt) for him to hunt a few animals which had been placed... I guess like stocking a lake for fishing. One of these was a bear cub. Roosevelt refused to shoot the baby bear, and upon hearing it a toy maker made a stuffed bear and named it a 'Teddy bear' after the president.

So there you have it. Maybe a few errors but the central idea is there :-)

*yawn*
Is it sad that I just woke up an hour ago and I want to go back to sleep?

*hugs back* Thanks. I didn't have any nightmares :hop: But I would like to go back to the good sleep I was getting. Gah I need structue and won't have any for months hehe well I mean permant structure ah well! All starts are good and glad you're feeling slghttly better.

I know how that feels sweet. But somewhere inside you is that strength keeping you alive *lotsa hugs*

I havent had a really decent night sleep in forever. So if I get to sleep between 1-2am and sleep for about 6/7 hours depending if I have to be up early or not....is my idea of decent these days unfortnately :pinch:

I think I'm getting better with this cold YAY! :hop:

i know the feeling Ally, i want to go to sleep all the time no matter how long i've been up!
*squishes* i'll be ok.
Glad the headache's going.
And that's a good story - what a nice start for a nice toy =)

I'm going out tonight! To a friend's house, I've even had a bath!! x

Lost is closest to useless in my "I am currently" thingy. That even though in the last two hours I've gotten my husband to work via the ford dealership, got a case of motor oil for mom in law, got two fathers day cards with no real content. And gotten groceries though I forgot milk. That's twice this week.

I still haven't heard from my 17 year old friend or her sis. Wondering if she finally succeeded in her suicide attempt.

Now, what do I do with the rest of my day? I should phone a client to pick up his stuff I guess. Clean the kitchen and laundry room....

Oh noes :(
Keep fighting Jeremy!!!!
*huggles you*
I wish I could help...

How is everyone?
Ima trying to read back...but it well aint sinking in...:blink:

^ same old with me m'deary.
and how's you?

Hey just wanted to say hi, can't really concentrate much atm but thinking of you all.
*leaves hugs for everybody*
xxxxx

*jumps on Jo*

I've missed you :(

Alexxxxxxx, I love u :D

My concentration today is worth spit too.
I just vacuumed our laundry room, which gets coated with cat litter cause our senior citizen cat is not tidy. And the bits of cat food off the kitchen floor. And a quick run through the middle.

Who is this domestic type who has taken over my body?

Hehehe love you toooo hunni ^_^

Haha bless Susan :P
I know the feeling....I got all mother-y the other day.
That's just not me.

*pounces on Jo*
Hey Jo, good to see you :-) sorry you're having problems concentrating I hate that...

hehe is that why you stole my glasses and then me? :laugh:

Exhausted. Flat. Pathetic

Got a job for the summer, that's good.
Apartment stuff is going pretty smoothly, that's good.

Should be feeling pretty good right now, huh?

So why am I exhausted and flat? Ugh *bangs head on wall*
And pathetic? Well the apartment I've got is government housing. Nice apartments... For poor people. Added bonus? Since I've got to be out of this apartment by the 30th I get to go talk to some guy about technically being homeless:pinch: Woo-hoo, go Ally!
Then there's the fact that in order to keep my cat I had to have a Dr's note saying that I need him... Even more pathetic.
Is it also pathetic that I've got three cuts that should have been stitched but instead are currently butterflyed? I guess it could be worse, I could have more...

*sigh*

Sorry for the pity session, didn't want to annoy:-(

I finally heard from my friend.
Husband is amazed and delighted that I actually did some housework.
My primary care physician said that the problem with my tooth probably is my sinuses and to keep taking a decongestant, day and night. Low dose of a new asthma med too.

I have to be the only person who loses weight on vacation/holiday. Husband gave me a you've got to be kidding look. I reminded him of Fort Union, Chaco Canyon, Butler Canyon and downtown Santa Fe. Walking. Thus my weight is down! :hop:

Waiting for my husband to get home from work. We're having something with meat in it for dinner so he cooks cause my attention span is so short. I've probably done this before; You might be a redneck if your smoke detector tells you when dinner is done.

Hugs to everyone

*hides in her corner and wants Emma =[ *

sowwy helen.
and I'm outta here. need to go nudge husband and cuddle the cat.

Hae fun Susan :)

Well, I'm back. 550 miles driving since late afternoon but I am now back at uni. I will post more tomorrow, well later today. I dunno, but Thursday anyway when I, I dunno gain some energy or something.

*hugs everyone who needs them and kicks Ally for poking her*

*special hugs for helen for sorting stuff, reminding ally, generally being Helen and many other random things*