*sits and rocks in the corner* I'm sorry about last night.

Feeling so crappy right now.
Ever since my boyfriend went on this damn break with me, not only have I not seen him much (and he is my best friend) but none of my other friends seem interested in spending time with me.
There's loads of pictures on his facebook of him and our mates doing stuff together, and I was never even invited.
Really upsets me, you know? x

*Hugs and hot cocco to all*

Have been hiding out in real life for the past four days at a good friends.

Am hoping all are ok and coping with there surrounding world {weather it be snow, rain, or humid} and that everyone has had a wonderful week.

Well I survived my mums, she said nothing to me. :blink:

Am increasingly worried about my best friend, I dont think I am giving her enough support. Wish I could make it all better for her as it has been a really rough couple of weeks and her illness is not improving. I dont really know what else I can give or do for her to help. I am worried she will lose the battle.

Sorry everyone.

*Hides under the bed and cries*

*cuddles everyone lots*

Emma, don't worry about last night babe.

Hana, you know I loves you lots and I'm always here for you to talk ;) Almost back home babe, almost there.

To everyone else who's asked how I am, I'm doing a bit better today thank you :D

Hi all,

Zowie - *extra big hug* since I seperated from the he-devil he has been out lots, having a laugh with people I thought were 'our' friends, I know how you feel and it is horrible, he is supposed to be my best friend, doesn't act like it tho (not even had my presents from him yet - I gave him his before the big day so he could have them).

Kahlia - *big big hug* I am always here to give hugs if you need them (I don't log in too often but if you need one just think it and you can have one from me).

Ravyn, I am so so today, made myself go to the gym and supermarket so at least I got out and about. How's you?
Did get a funny story from my mum, she literally ran all round the field looking for my horse - he is hard to miss as he is mainly white - she thought he had escaped - he was standing right in the middle the whole time.

Everyone else, hope everyone is safe, *lots and lots of hugs*

gone from so so to utterly crap, he-devil is still seeing his w****, he promised he was not, crying on phone to mum just now, feel so sick :(

Ravyn: None at all? BLASPHEMY! XDD. And thank you! ^__^. Also, as for feeling emotionally dead, bleugh, I know how that goes. I used to end up feeling, well...hollow, a lot. Kind of like I was on autopilot. Tis not nice D: *hugs*

Emma: *Hugs you too* No need to apologise <3

Helen: Glad you're feeling a bit better now 8D

Zowie: >__< That sounds horrible *hugs you too*

Y'know, I think I'm starting to lose all my friends.

I lost all my friends from school/college when I moved, 'cause none of 'em wanted to stay in touch with me, or if they did, I'd only have half arsed conversations, before they finally gave up.

And now I worry I'm losing the friends I still have got. Seems those who I used to chat and laugh with for hours have run out of things to say. I'm tired of poking stale MSN windows after thirty minutes, half an hour, an hour, two hours of silence, only to have a brief conversation that lasts between one to five minutes. Which is then inevitably followed by more silence.

.__.;; I must be really horrible to talk to

Dayna *hugs* you are not horrible to talk to at all!! I enjoy all that you have added here. *hugs*

sorry, not feeling up to reply to everyone tonite... feeling quite empty today, if anyone has extra hugs, I'd love some... take care all... hopefully i'll be up for chatting tomorrow...

*curls up in a corner of denial tent with lots of warm duvets*

Thanks Ravyn *hugs back* I'm glad to know I've actually been able to bring something positive here. I hope you do feel better tomorrow, as well <3

Thanks for the hugs and the well wishes... you have brought lots of positive-ness here! Don't let yourself forget that!

Hi everyone..
 

Hi, my name is Nick and I'm 24. I used to use RYL a long time ago, but my account had gone now so this is a new one :). Going through a rough time and I thought about some old friends. Hope everyone is ok.

Nick
xx

Ravyn: I'm glad ^__^ and I won't

Hey there, Nick. Welcome back to RYL, I'm Däyna

Hi there Nick :)

Anyone got some hugs for me? I'm feeling low tonight =\ and the freezing cold weather doesn't help :(

*Hugs Helen tightly* I know what you mean x_o. I'm so looking forwards to getting the heating back tomorrow. The sooner I can breathe without exhaling steam, the better!

*hugs Daya tight* :( It sucks

Thanks everyone for the warm welcome. Freezing here too...I have a small gas heater if anyone wants to share :)

Helen: Definitely D: roll on summer!

Nick: Oooh, got a little heater here, can't use it much 'cause it eats the electricity like nobody's business <__<;;

It uses a good 'ol gas bottle, lol ;)....but yes, roll on summer plz.

*bursts into tears*

*hugs Lucy*

hope your ok x

*cuddles everyone*

I can't stop thinking about harm.
****.
>.<

^ *sends hugs back to you*

Thanks babe, I hope you're ok :(

Hi Nick
*Hugs to everyone*
Hope all are doing ok and enjoy new years.

Hi Nick, welcome -- it's nice to meet you.

*hugs Helen* How are you doing now?

Dayna - hope you've warmed up some. :)

D'arcy, how are you doing? Hope all is well.

Lucy - *Hugs* - how are you doing?

Nicole - Happy New Years to you too! How are things going?

*Hugs and cuddles to all*

Hope everyone else is doing ok too..

--
I had a decent sleep and am clear-headed today.. yay! Going to the city today to meet with a friend, should be fun.

Thank you guys for more warm welcomes, feels like home already :blush:. i hope everyone is ok today.

*Triggering* SI
 

Hello Ravyn. Glad you had a good sleep.

Am not doing to well at the moment as I cant sleep. When I do I dream of cutting and am waking up with a blade in my hand. I haven't told anyone yet as I don't know how they will react. It is getting very scary and I feel alone even though I have a close friend who is very supportive and helpful. She is with me most of the time. Really don't know how to fight this.
Sorry for the ramble.
*Hugs and hot chocolate to warm everyone up*
*Crawls back into the cuboard and rocks*

*gratefully talks hot chocolate and hugs from Nicole*

Glad to hear you're feeling welcome Nick :)

*hugs Nicole* Don't apologize for letting yourself let your feelings out hun. I don't have advice for you, but I'm thinking of you and hoping that this passes soon as I can imagine it must be scary. *leaves lots of safe hugs*

Thank you Ravyn
*Accepts hugs greatfully*

ravynsoul - I'm okay today. Feeling a lot better. Last night turned a bit.. Hmm. But yes. Doing better so far today. Hope you're okay *sends hugs*. x

Too cold for words here.

Feeling horrible

That's about it.

*cuddles everyone tight*

*Hugs Mary Anne*

Hello Nick *waves* I'm Arwen but everyone calls me Zowie :P

So I've been invited to a new years eve party at my best friends (not my boyfriend, my best girl mate). But it's a party with everyone who have been leaving me out of everything recently. I just feel like they only invited me coz they feel obliged. And yes, this applies to my best friend and boyfriend.
No one seems to want to spend time with me anymore :(
x
x

*Hugs everyone tightly*

*hugs everyone tightly*

Hope everyone who hasnt checked in are ok :(

*curls up into a tiny ball and cries*

*sighs*
I feel like Eeyore. Oh bother. Just another cloudy day.
Dammit I really wish all of this was easier. Then I suppose it wouldn't give me any character and I'd be really boring. Most of the people I knew back in high school have all of these fancy jobs and are making tons of money, and are in relationships or married with kids. It's embarrassing I feel like a failure!!! Oh well.

I love all of you and hope you are feeling better.

D'Arcy

*hugs everyone*

sorry can't offer more support tonite.. take care everyone...

*curls up in a corner and hides under a duvet*

Hey everyone, I hope your all ok. Sending out big hugs, and glady receiving them too :blush: *curls up facing corner wishing everything would go away*

xx

*leaves champagne and cookies for everyone*

How are you doing today Lucy?

*waves at Nick* heya, welcome to psych ward. How are you doing? *leaves you special hugs*

I hope you find a way to fight it Nicole. When are you next seeing your psych? *offers safe hugs*

*offers blanket and tissues to Mary Anne* Hope you start to feel a bit better soon.

*cuddles Zowie* It may or may not be true that that is why they are inviting you hun but the only way you will find out is by going. They may feel awkward because of the break or it may be any number of reasons. Either way, isn't it better to be out than at home alone with your thoughts?

*hugs Amanda* How are you? Whats wrong hun? I hope you have managed to find the strength to stay safe.

You aren't a failure D'arcy. I know it would be easier if things were different but I agree that if they were you wouldn't be *you* and you may not have some of your best traits. I hope your day improves.

Are you alright Ravyn? Will be about randomly if you need or want to talk. *offers safe hugs and warm thoughts*

Danya....how are you? You've been a little quiet the last couple of days, are you ok? *hugs*

Hells, I know you are worried about your nan but please try not to. I hope you are ok today *hugs* xx

*Wishes everyone a Happy New Year*

Woohoooooooo


Happy NYE ppl


it's almost 3:30 am here and i'm deadset buggered lol

still 2008 here, hoping that 2009 will be better, spending the night on my own, was invited out at least but not up to going out.

had another fight with the he-devil, I feel horrible still (not about the fight, I know I am right!)

pomegranate - thank for the blankets, tis still cold here, champagne sounds great

*hugs everyone very tight*

*cuddles all*

Happy New Year to those in 2009 :P

Mary Anne: x__o I hope you have an okay evening tonight *hugs*

Jetforce: Happy New Year's Eve to you too!

Emma: I'm alright thanks. Apologies for the quietness as of late, not really known what to reply with at times

*Glomps to all*

EDIT: O HEY. Helen posted just before I did, lmao *cuddles back*


Anyways. I am okay now, although I was stressed as hell earlier. My housemate and me went into town, needed to do some fun ole grocery shopping :thumbup: and oh dear God. CROWDS. I. Really. ****ing. Hate. Crowds. Kept having panic attacks <__<;;. Only mild ones thank ****, but still x_o. And was irritable cos I didn't get a whole lot of sleep last night, and then ended up feeling physically sick. Soyeah. Wasn't the best start to the day. So fingers crossed the ole current good mood lasts ;D

loleditagain: Yeah. Crowds. Queues. PEOPLE PUSHING UP BEHIND ME. Urk. Whenever someone brushed against my back it just reminded me of previous SA D: so hm. Random associations ftl. Wait...****IHAVEANOTHERASSOCIATIONNOW?! *Headdesk* <___<;;

*crawls out from under duvet and offers hugs to everyone*

Emma - thanks for the concern, I'm just feeling off and confused right now.. not sure exactly what I'm feeling and I extremely dislike new year's eve for the forced partying and merriment... ugh! I wish I could stay home.. but I'm told by my parents I need to go out.. thanks for the warm hugs and safe thoughts! How are you doing now?

Hey everyone: Thanks for cuddles and hugs that were offered! *offers cuddles and hugs back to everyone*

Happy NewYears to everyone in 2009 and Happy Early NewYears to everyone still in 2008 :) [cool.. just thought about it, we're talking to people in different years... almost like time travel :P sorry, I know that was lame, but I couldn't help it]

Dayna - Sorry that you got stuck in the midst of crowds and it triggered bad memories.. *offers calm thoughts* Hope that passes soon.

Mary Anne - sorry to hear about your fight! :S Hope your night is good.

Jem, D'arcy, Amanda, Zowie, Lucy, Nick, Nicole, Helen - how are you all doing now? Hope things are looking up!

Hope those who haven't been here in a while are doing ok too!!

Hugs everyone!

Ravyn: Thanks x_o. And sorry to hear you're not feeling too brill either D: *hugs*

Dayna: *accepts hugs and hugs back* I am grateful though, that I can go online here and at least feel surrounded by people who understand... i feel less alone and crazy then. Take care!

Yeah, I can imagine. And you take cares too <3

I am just not with it properly. I don't want to move. How do you know if you are going crazy? :(