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-   -   I don't know how to cope with being ugly (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=256317)

liaaay 28-08-2019 10:29 AM

I don't know how to cope with being ugly
I'm a 14 year old girl, and I am actually ugly. I know so, because my friends have told me I am, and so has some of my family members. I know they're not trying to be rude, it's just the truth. Sometimes, around the time I get my period in the month, I get a few pimples on my forehead, and one of my friends has a habit of whenever she sees me with some, she touches the area with her backhand and says "oh my gosh wash your face!". Not all of my friends are like that though, and I stopped hanging around that girl. That's not even my only issue. I have very light skin but dark circles, and discoloration around my mouth. I basically look like a ghost. I've been wearing makeup to school every single day to hide the yellowish color around my mouth and my dark circles, and also putting on large circle lens glasses just so people don't notice the rest of my face. My family members say I look like a malnourished child, and asked me why I don't just eat healthier. I've tried talking to my mom about this, and she told me to stop being silly and just don't care about the way I look. Well, that's sure a lot easier said than done! I hate looking at myself in the mirror and seeing my face. I hate how I spend so much money on skincare products and still look like garbage. I hate wasting time in the morning when I'm already late to do my makeup. I hate walking into my school and seeing girls who were born pretty and don't need any makeup. I hate knowing that I will never, ever be as pretty as any of them. I want to accept myself, but it's hard. I don't know how to. My insecurity has gone through the roof. I hear everyone talking about loving yourself no matter what you look like, and that's a bunch of bullcrap. Those people don't know what it's like to be ugly. How do I overcome my insecurity?

Zurg 28-08-2019 02:36 PM

It honestly breaks my heart to read this. You're only 14 and you already have this massive self hatred thing going on.

When i was 14 i had soooo many spots. Seriously, i had a lot and i still do to this day (i'm 37) because i pick at them. Some days i hate myself for looking like this but most days i am able to go outside and meet the world regardless of how i feel about my face because i really do hope that most people actually Care more about how i am as a person rather than what i look like. I don't want to downplay being 14 and feeling ugle because trust me, i've been there and know the feeling. But i want to say that you probably don't even look half as bad as you feel you do. We are our own worst critics and what we see and can't unser when we look into a mirror is usually not something a lot of other people pay attention to.

I went to School with other girls who also had a spot problem and they wore several layers of foundation to conceal their skin and honestly, i just couldn't bother. Because i am a lazy git and because i'd hate the feeling of wearing so much stuff on my face. I took the stupid and insensitive comments for what they are; stupid and insensitive. If someone speaks to you like that it's a sign they are very unhappy themselves and feels an immense need to take it out on someone else. Those people are not worth your time.

If you feel up to it then maybe a trip to your doctor could highlight whether you need some additional vitamins and maybe he/she has some suggestion for proper skin care. But honestly, you probably look fine.

RaeNoctem 26-09-2019 05:47 AM

I agree with Zurg, breaks my heart also. Listen to Zurgs advice. But private.message. I think you probably aren't ugly.Talk to me. Show me. And I will share myself and be honest.

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