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-   -   Beyond repair. (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=248931)

chinahorse 31-03-2019 07:35 PM

She's made me feel like my self harm isn't bad enough and I should go.

Eska 31-03-2019 07:38 PM

That isn't true. You need to be there and you deserve treatment, it's important that the cuts get looked after so that they don't get infected and you don't have more trouble with them in the future.

chinahorse 31-03-2019 07:43 PM

They always get infected anyway.

Stellata 31-03-2019 08:05 PM

Take good care of yourself. You should stay.

tamobhuuta 31-03-2019 08:24 PM

How are you getting on? You deserve to have treatment.

chinahorse 31-03-2019 09:05 PM

I'm being seen and have promised to wait for psyche after. Going to have to wait until midnight. I cried when a hca brought me some water.

Stellata 31-03-2019 09:07 PM

Well done for waiting. That's a long wait though, do you have something to do?

It does sound like you need some tlc.

chinahorse 31-03-2019 09:11 PM

I don't have anything no and they're using staples which hurt. I don't want them.

Stellata 31-03-2019 09:18 PM

Maybe get some rest if you can?
Staples sound rough. I hope they give you some local anaesthetic.

chinahorse 31-03-2019 10:23 PM

Hah not for the big one. Was absolutely awful. And the dr was a dick so I was a dick back and made him get someone else to do it.
And now the long wait for psyche. In clothes that are covered in blood.

chinahorse 31-03-2019 10:27 PM

Don't know what to say to psyche. Other than I'm not suicidal but I really can't live anymore.

Stellata 01-04-2019 10:15 AM

How did it go? How are you doing this morning?

chinahorse 01-04-2019 01:11 PM

They were nice. I went home. Barely slept. Work has a medical emergency. I want to cry and go home and cut more. It's because it wasn't deep enough yesterday. The man told me it wasn't at the time but I ignored him and look where that got me.

one_step_closer 01-04-2019 02:41 PM

What did psych say? What happens from here? There is no such thing as deep enough or not deep enough, you are hurting and that's all there is to it. How is your day going now?

Stellata 01-04-2019 07:47 PM

I'm so glad they were nice. But it sounds like you still need some support. How are things now?

chinahorse 01-04-2019 07:52 PM

Psych was nice. We talked a lot which sort of helped. They said I should call to see what's going kn with a new cpn. Said I shouldn't have stopped aripiprazole myself.

My day has been rough. Spent most of it trying not to cry.

Stellata 01-04-2019 08:52 PM

When do you next have some support?

Yes, stopping such an intense med suddenly and on your own isn't the best.

So sorry that you've had a rough day. What can help you stay safe this evening?

chinahorse 01-04-2019 09:54 PM

Need support now. Cut again. Eating quiche.

chinahorse 01-04-2019 10:27 PM

I mean support from the cmht.

Soft Kitty 01-04-2019 10:37 PM

Yes, you do. It sounds really important to prioritise calling the CMHT tomorrow if you can, though I totally appreciate the time difficulties. It's so important that you're supported though. Do you have a crisis or out of hours team you can call when things are really shit? It's different everywhere, but I know in my town you can call the crisis team out of hours if you're under the CMHT, I was wondering if that's an option for you. Do the injuries need treatment?


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