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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 01:41 AM

write about my weekend? I went to the british motor show thing, and then there was a meatloaf gig in the evening, which was absolutely awesome. And this morning... I went to church, and I... I found where I belong. I felt acceptance, people want to help me. I... I even spoke to people there again about my scars. They.... I'm not used to this...

Had a bit of a... wobble? on friday though. One of my mates tried to do something unspeakable to another of my mates... and it bought back memories, and flashbacks of my past... but... he's truly sorry for what he did and he's in a bad place at the moment but... I hate him for what he did, yet I still want to help him. ****ed up, much?

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 01:48 AM

Ally... you need to go... you need it. You really do! *pets lots*

Shadow...motor show would have been wicked fun! And meatloaf too!!!! I'm glad you've found somewhere you feel accepted *pets lots* It's okay to want to help someone that you really hate.... it really is. just shows that you're a better person than you think!!!! *cuddles*

blondiebear 04-08-2008 01:49 AM

I'm crying in part because a friend showed me a story she is writing and it reminds me so much of my teen years.

Crying cause I don't want Jeff to go. We all say negative stuff here, it is where we can be ourselves and be safe! No matter how bad or how angry or how sad or desperate or how needy we feel.

Jeff, I think you totally underestimate your value, the soft heart inside you. You've totally given yourself to us to cry on and pound on. Please stay? Please?

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 01:52 AM

*cuddles*

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 02:16 AM

Aww, auburn, sounds like you had quite an upsetting time on Friday. *cuddles*
I am glad to hear about your experience at church though. I'm glad you are even able to talk to folks there about your scars. Wow. I haven't been to my church all summer... I love those folks dearly and I know the feeling is mutual... But it's too hot for long sleeves and wearing my gloves screams 'look at me, I SI'... And I'm pretty sure none of them know... Oh, sorry, lol I think I'm a little jealous.

*sigh* but Jess I don't want to go... wanna come with? Think you could make it up here in 15 1/2 hours? Lol

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 02:18 AM

I wish I could love! I really do. Do you have a friend there who could go with you? Do you want my mobile number so you can text me or something???

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 02:22 AM

Yeah, being able to talk to them about my scars and everything, well wasn't exactly my choice, one of the youth club leaders walked in on me almost chucking 4.5 months down the drain and slashing my arms up, but these things happen for a reason, I suppose.
Yeah, Friday was difficult. Thursday had been a friend's funeral, so to have all that on top, almost pushed me over the edge, but my friend, she has such great parents (not that she sees it) and... they almost treated me like their own daughter.
wow. just writing this out, it makes me realise just how many people there actually are that care about me.

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 02:29 AM

Going to go to bed after this, I think. Try and sleep, but before I do, something from friday night that's bugging me:

What makes a person a "bad" person?

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 02:31 AM

Oh Auburn, I'm glad writing that out helped you realize that you've got so many folks that care for you.

Aww, Jess *snuggles* no, no one to come with me... Tbh I think if any of my friends were to come if be mortified... You're different cause you understand this stuff. And I'd TOTALLY take you up on your mobile number... But I'm already out of text messages for this month :pinch:. I've decided that, when I'm caught up on my mobile bill I'm going to get unlimited texting... Cheaper than going over all the time and besides, if I had it set up already if be able to 'take you with me' tomorrow :-)

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 02:31 AM

Lots of people DO care about you and i'm glad that you are seeing that. It's why writing stuff out is good!!!! *pets lots* i hope you get some decent sleep!

A bad person... hmm... I suppose it depends on what context you mean it in.

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 02:33 AM

honey, do you want me to give it to you anyways? that way you DO have it. and you can use it if you get desperate?

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 02:35 AM

I don't particularly know what context exactly, but I was just thinking about what my friend said to me after he'd done that "thing" to her. He said he was truly sorry for what had happened and did it make him a bad person, but... well truthfully, I don't know if it does or not...

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 02:37 AM

I don't know. I really don't. I don't know how any person can say whether or not a person is a 'bad' person. It's just... i dunno, something that we don't have the ability to truly judge.

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 02:53 AM

Mmm, bad person, that's tough... Esp not knowing the context (and no, you don't need to share, I respect that it's private).

Hmm, sure Jess, why not. If I don't use it tomorrow I'm sure there will be another crises one of these days. We can swap, then you can text me if you need a sholder.

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:04 AM

okays sweetie :) i'll pm it to you now!

effervescence 04-08-2008 03:28 AM

bleuuuuuuuuurrrrghhh i feel sick

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 03:29 AM

Yes, my phone bill is just about enough to make a person cry :pinch: I need a job very soon... *crosses her fingers that her interview is soon and that SafeWay wants her*

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 04:04 AM

what's up chlo?

*pets ally* it'll be good!

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 04:07 AM

*curls up in corner*

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 04:10 AM

*glomps sophie lots*


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