*cuddles Hayley lots*

I'm sorry you having such a bad time..

My housing worker came by to try and sort out that energy company , My electric meter is apparently busted and there are 2 gas meters neither of which carry my registration number I think , so one missing gas meter hmmm.VEY confusing .
I S.I. a little :( It had been building in me for a while , it's not bad (physically) . I'm really worried about the benefits people medical they want me to take. I don't want people looking at my scars and treating me as some benefit fraudster , I fon't know why else they would have sent for me , just to judge . UGH!.
EDIT . Or maybe they want to take away my Benefits!? I haven't done anyhing to make that happen but still......*Paranoid*

*huggles Helen* thanks for the hugs sweetie. I've read up to page 1204 now, so I'm getting caught up with things. Hope things have settle down at home with you now.

Yikes Mark, a lot has been going on and seems confusing about the gas meter's etc, but we kinda knew something had to be majorly wrong for you to get such a stupid bill. I'm glad your support worker is on the case. As for medical for benefits. I've had a few of them over the years. I always get myself in a pickle and freak out and usually end up in tears in there (sorry this isn't helping, is it?!) BUT, they are never as bad as I fear them to be and they've never judged me or called me a fraud. So please don't freak out too much. *extra huggles*

Thankyou for the huggles *Huggles Hayley back*

*hugs Mark* That's not good about the gas meters stuff, glad your support worker is on it :)

*hugs Hayley some more* Yeah they are thank you. Wish everything else was better ha :'(

ooh I spy a Crimson! *huggles Crimson*

I've read 1205 now.
Got chest pains too now so think I will get off my fat arse and take pain meds and have a fag.

*gets off fat arse to take pain meds, then toddles out to smoking shelter*

I spy a Hels (your invisibility cloak isn't working right now!! *cuddles*), a Hayley, a Crimson, and a Mark!! *ginormous cuddles*

My internship interview-y thing went well (if anyone cares)... I start on 17 May, 8am-4pm, it's going to be interesting. :-X I've never had a job or anything like one, this is going to be the beginning of my working career. I'm scared!! but excited... it's not paid, which sucks, but oh well. :) It sounds interesting...

Mark, I'm sorry about your gas meter(s). That's so dumb. I hope things get sorted out soon!! *cuddles* Care to share a virtual lunch with me? :D (anyone else can join us!!) I know it's later there, but it's lunchtime here... figure we can go outside to the garden and have a picnic. There aren't any caterpillars out there are there? :P

Hayley, I'm sorry that you're in pain... definitely take your pain meds, and do NOT eat an apple, enjoy the banana instead, or here *offers some pineapple* I love pineapple... Mark got me some the other day, lol... virtual of course... wish it had been IRL. *pouts* How else are you doing? any plans for the rest of the day?

*cuddles Hels* Honestly, sometimes you just don't show up at the bottom of the screen, sweetie... try not to take it too hard, we love you and care about you even if we don't "spy" you. You are just as important as the rest of us and please please please feel free to type about how things are going. *more cuddles* ♥

Crimson, how are you?? *cuddles*

I'm really tired... gotta get soc studying done though... I know a lot of the stuff on the study guide which is awesome... but I'm a little worried about getting done on time. :-S It starts at 5:30pm and I have to be at another class at 6:30 I think... so I hope I can get done by then!! I usually take about 10 minutes to take his exams so I don't think that there is anything for me to worry about, except I will be VERY careful on this exam to do my very best. :-S I need - NEED - to pull my grade up in that class... so yeah.

Anyway. I'd best get working on my health psych paper - but I found out that I don't have a final then, I just turn in my paper!! WOOHOO!!!!! :D

*hides* :o

*comes back in from smoking shelter - sprays self with pretty smelling stuff so she doesn't stink of fags*

ooh I spy and April now too! *huggles April*

*goes back to catching up with people* page 1206 here I come!

*huggles Hayley* Have you played much WoW yet? You're amazing for catching up with so many pages, wow!! lol. Oh, and we've convinced Mark to try WoW, how awesome is that? :D (couldn't remember if you were around when that happened, sorry if I'm reiterating it :o)

Ugh, sociology I HATE YOU!!! :(

Oh, and I just made a death knight (unholy) on Area 52 realm last night, I think I mentioned it, but she's Horde and I've NEVER had a Hordie in Outlands before, so here's her armory link so you can see what she looks like. :D

Jarrod helped me through the starting quests with a Tauren blood-specced dk... lol... it was fun. :) I didn't die at all, which was even more awesome. Hehe.

*hides again* :o

Congratulations on your internship :D Exciting times :)

I know I don't show up. That's not what's bothering me. It's the fact I make posts and they get ignored, mostly because they are the last post on the previous page and someone makes a post at the exact time or straight after so mine gets ignored. Always seems to be when people have asked me to explain...I know I'm just being pathetic. Even if it does really upset me. Will stop whining....

*hides*

Read up to 1207 now, I'm getting there. It is good at keeping my thoughts a bit more levelled out. :-D I feel like I'm doing something worthwhile, seeing how my friends are.

I was around for the start of the talk of Mark getting WoW and I've encouraged him to be on the same realm as me (darkspear - just incase you've forgotten mark! :-p) Played on it a lot the last 2evenings to keep me safe. I think I'll be back on there once I've caught up here. I dinged lvl 26 yeasterday and I looked at my 'play' time and I've just clocked up 3days worth. Don't know if that's good going or not for a first timer and I've only done 6dungeons because of the problems with my graphics. The guild I was in fell apart, so now I'm guildless and feeling quite lonely even on there :sad:

Anyhoo, enough WoW talk...for now!

Oh and Helen I'm sorry your invisability cloak still seems to have been confusing people the past few days. Its just that sometimes your name doesn't show up as viewing the thread when I start a response and then once I've posted it, it seems you were veiwing and did a post of your own and so it seems we've ignored you. I'm glad I can see you today. I'd never ignore you, you've been here since the start for me. I value you and I hope you're feeling a bit better about that situation too now. *extra huggles*

April - I know this is going back a few pages but I hope you don't dislike all catapillers because I think of myself as a catapiller but that one day I'll turn into a beautiful butterfly:-D

edit: ah Helen you've just explained bout feeling ignored as I was typing this. I hope that I pay enough attention to read all the posts of everyone and respond appropriately. I apologise if I don't.

And helen's post reminded me to say - congratulations on your internship April, I do care, I just got distracted talking WoW with you!

You're not whinging, sweetheart... the same thing would/does upset me as well, it's just that I'm not brave - yes, BRAVE - enough to let other people know. But we're not doing it on purpose... I apologize if I've done it and not responded to your post, it's just so hard to keep up with this thread sometimes!! *cuddles gently* I know that's no excuse to ignore your post - but it's not ignoring at all, it's me being old & forgetful... (lol) ...I wish I could make you feel better, sweetie... you are such a good friend of mine. Remember that - I'm here for you. ♥

*Super internship hugs for April* Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!

*Helen , I don't ignore you , you are totally valued as an inmate of this ward *Hugs*

Wow Hayley you are going through those pages !!!

Just finished reading page 1210....so whilst I remember I just want to say:

Thanks JK for taking the time to type out the 'Everybody Hurts' lyrics. Its a song me and my best mate were talking about only the other day saying that as tough times we often put it on on repeat!

Also thank you to lots of people who gave me hugs even when I wasn't posting. It warms my heart to know that you were thinking about me. I was thinking about all of you too, I was just too all over the place to even make myself come in here and be socialable. Oh yes and Hello to our new wardies! *group huggle!!*

I need to have something to eat before I continue reading. I've been sleeping on and off all day today and meal times have gone out of the window...

*toddles off to kitchen*

Hayley , did you take your pain meds? Are you feeling any better?

*Waves at Crimson* I spot you :)

Well... I got caught up to all but the last half a page before having to run downstairs... but now that I'm back I totally forgot what I was gonna say for my replies...
Ah well. *huggles everyone but Owen*
*waves at O*
Oh... I remember a couple things I was gonna say. I agree with JK Julie. Abuse is abuse is abuse... just because you learned how to minimize it doesn't make it ok nor does it mean you got off easy.
Hmmm... forgot the rest I was gonna say again... If this keeps up its gonna be a long day... Anyhow... I'm gonna head back to page 1215 (i wrote it down lol) and listen to the music vid someone posted.
Oh yes and... Lynx (and anyone else new) I'm Crimson *offers a hand for shaking and a hug for taking :D*

Thanks everybody, I'm sorry for snapping :( *cuddles each and every one of you* Sorry it's not much of a post, but it's best I can manage at the moment.

Hayley, hope you've taken your pain meds missy, or you'll have me to deal with mwaha!

*runs and tackle hugs Mark* Is the company in question finally agreeing that you don't owe them some absurd amount of money yet?

with a plate full of baked beans on toast I've made it up to 1213 so far. Getting caught up!

Yes I was a good girl and took my pain meds - thanks for caring Mark and helen.

Ooh Crimson, I've just been catching up regarding your housing/finance situation. I wish there was more I could do to help. *huggles* ......*feels guilty that I get my rent paid for by hardworking tax payers*

No, The Company in question is not *Sigh* but the readings have been coming from the wrong meter or something . I feel stupid for not understanding it but it's SO complicated. I have a gas meter but there are 2 meters and both are being used but we don't know who is using the other one or something . oh and the electricity meter simply has not been going around at all . .

Got that ?

*Hugs Crimson*

OOOhhhhh April I like that armour btw :)

*hugs Hayley* You shouldn't feel bad for that. I'm on a list to have help with my rent but well the list for that here is very long (up to 3 yrs of waiting while they sort out the people that don't actually need the help).

*hugs Mark* Hmmmm... I'm glad your support worker is helping because it seems hinky no matter what reason they give so far. Even if you use bot the gas and the electric constantly every day and night I don't see how its possible to get a bill as high as they were trying to have you pay. And as for the 2 meters being there... I'd think it was in their own best interests to figure out where the other meter is hooked up to.

Hinky! What a cool word, new one to me:)
Yes I would have thought so , maybe they'll find out when the engineer comes between 8am and 1pm next Tuesday. Lets hope this gets sorted out. What with that and the phone bill (Which I think is sorted out) and the benefits medical I have been TOO stressed out.

*Hugs Crimson and Hayley and Helen and April and everyone else* I want hugs ... I realise that sounds pathetic but I do:s

Not pathetic at all. *hugs Mark tightly*

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/hinky :D I love uncommon words.

well 2hours and 20minutes and I'm all caught up - phew! Too much to comment on, especially as the ward is moving along again at the moment.

*huggles Mark* just 'cos you want some!
*huggles Crimson* that's a shitty system that people have been able to take advantage of it and then people who need the help like you have to struggle for years! OOh let me loose on them whilst I'm still PMDDin and I'll sort them out....RAAAAA!!!

*huggles Vicki and Laura* 'cos I can see you!

*hugs everyone tightly*

Hinky :)
Acting suspiciously; strange, unusual; acting in a manner as if having something to hide, or seemingly crooked.

I like it .

*Huge Hugs for Helen*

*giggles* Yeah it is pretty bad... theres stuff that bumps you up the list with a point system and being a disabled vet that works and has kids...I get bumped up a bit so I'm not gonna have the whole 3 yr wait... And at least I have a job so it's not as bad as it could be. I do despise those that lie about their situation and get money that other people need. But I like working here and seeing the files of people that get caught and prosecuted by the state. Would you believe that one person made up an extra 7 household members to get money at PFD time (Alaska Permanent Fund Dividend)?!? It was crazy... That lady got jail time and had to pay it all back.

*huggles Helen*
*runs around the ward being hyper and hugging everyone (except Owen)*

*hides under the table*

*hugs mark* ive got loads of hugs to hand out so you can have lots of hugs from me! lol. That is confusing about the 2 meters and whatnot, but im glad that it seems to be starting to get sorted out.

*hugs hayley* wow you are amazing for catching up on all of those pages... i just read 6 pages and thought it was a lot so... 20.. whew! hope you took your pain meds.

*hugs crimson* i saw a few pages back that u thought ur whining was pathetic... Just wanted to say that it was not whining nor was it pathetic. We are all here to listen and help each other.

*cuddles helen* Im sorry that you've been feeling so low and that some of that lowness might be because of the ward here :-/ Please take care of yourself hun.

*hugs april* im glad your internship interview went well! Thats exciting! Good luck on your exams.

*hugs lindsay*

*cuddles everyone else that wants hugs* - sorry if i didnt reply to you... im kinda in a rush but wanted to catch up a little.

My brain still seems to be stuck on that dream from the other night... so ridiculous. I also have a huge test tomorrow (50% of my grade) and a paper due... the paper is pretty much done, but i have a lot of studying today.. very stressful. Hopefully I can concentrate and ignore my other thoughts.

*cuddles everyone back lots* Thanks for the hugs :D

Getting tireeeed. Going out soon. Seriously hope that one of my best friends does come online tonight, but I'm not so sure at the moment...

*Scoots under the table with Lindsay and Hugs*

*gives Helen extra huggles back* we're getting good at this huggling malarky aren't we?! But do you need to add in some words along with those hugs? Don't be quiet or say you're fine if you're not! (EDIT: ah you added some words to a post whilst I was typing!)

Mark - your gas meters are indeed hinky, lol, you should get your SW to say that to them, lol see if they know what it means.

Thanks Crimson for the new word!! Think the lady that got jail time was super duper hinky!! ooh instead of 'crooks' for bad guys, can we say 'hinks'?! lol I'm glad that you won't have to wait the full 3years, but still.....

*goes under table to huggle Lindsay* do you want to talk about whatever you're hiding from?

*huggles Laura* its crummy that your nightmare affected you so much. I really hope that emersing yourself in studying helps to keep your mind focused. And good luck with the exam tomorrow!! *keeps fingers and toes crossed*

*toddles around ward to hug/wave at all those who are currently hiding or sleeping!*

Thanks Mark :)

*sits under the table with Lindsay aswell* What's wrong darling??

Hayley, we are indeed :D Mm I'm still really low. No change. My eyes are stinging because been crying so much today. Oh dear. Really want to talk to my best friend when I get back. But I know she's had a really bad day, almost same reasons :( So we shall see...

*bumps head on table* ooh its getting cosy under here! lol

Thanks Helen on expanding, though I don't have any words of wisdom I'm afraid. I'll keep my fingers and toes crossed extra (cos already done for Laura!) that you hear from your best friend. Perhaps as you're both struggling so much for similar reasons, that although you may not be constructively supporting one another, just by being there for eachother through it will be enough to help you cope. Oh and If I had a cure for sore eyes I'd share it with you, but I'm lacking.....ooh, just thought....do you reckon fresh cucumber slices would help?!

I have tea eye pillows for home spa treatments... dunno if it helps the part of the eye thats sore though...

*giggles* Eye Pillows! I have funny images in my head

Anyhoo my fellow wardies, I've been active in the common room for over 3hours straight now and it has done me the world of good and so whilst I'm feeling relatively ok I think its best I try and get a few bits done.

Thanks for all your support today - and always! *group huggle*

Only just seen your post Hayley but you've gone. However I'll still reply. Maybe cucumbers is a good idea hmm. My eyes seem alright now :S

My Dad made me laugh so much but I feel my lowness even more right now :'( Bollocks. Still hoping my best friend will be online. One of them are but would really like to speak to my other best friend too :(

*cuddles everyone*

Julie, I am hardly ever in here (used to practically live here though, lol) but i think it is pretty safe to say that no one would laugh at you for telling them what is bothering you... and if they do then I would venture to say that they are not worth your time.

Early morning tomorrow ( For me )
*Tucks Ward In*
*Nighttime hugs for all who want them* * Waves at Owen*

Again I'll leave my P.C. on stand-by tonight in case I'm up later :)

Sorry, Owen! *Hugs everyone except for Owen* I don't particularly like to be touched either, the virtual hugs I give everyone are more a "hey, I care about you" hug than an "I want physical contact" hug so I kind of know the feeling.

April: congrats on the internship!!!!

It has been a really calm day at work today. The migrain hasn't had a chance to kick in because of the painkiller, probably. Paula (my brother's girlfriend) accepted my friend request on Facebook. Now all I need to do is learn how to speak Finnish.

I am afraid to wake up again with bugs crawling over me though.

Tom's exam went quite well. We had a discussion over the phone about a couple of stuff mentioned in the exam. About "epical conversion", "locus amoenus", stuff like that.

Anyways.

Thanks for the hug Owen, means a lot as I know you don't like hugs, I'm Helen by the way :)

*hugs everyone else*

Night Mark :) I have an early morning tomorrow too. Sort of.

My best friend did come online for a bit so that helped. It's been a **** evening though ugh :/ *hides*

Busy day tomorrow for me too, gotta start and finish my paper... urgh... and then take my last final... my "final final".... lol... *giggles to self tiredly*

Thanks for the congrats everyone... am excited to start my internship although it's not paid and probably won't lead to a job. But it probably WILL help me get to know some professionals in the area, which would rock. :)

Erm was summat else I wanted to say but I forget now... :( Oh yes, I'm totally out of Klonopin now and my NP called in 15 mg for me - am going to have to take 2mg/day to make it last as long as I can, or else 1mg/day instead of my usual 4mg/day... and a close friend of mine who is studying nursing said that the withdrawal from it can cause seizures. Read about withdrawal from benzos online and I don't like what I read... :-/ Maybe I SHOULD start getting weaned off it... :-X

*hides in a hole* :'(

*waves to owen*

*hugs helen, crimson, april, mark, forever broken, tineke, and hayley*

Can't study.... omg. Im freaking out about this test. I seem to be incapable of memorizing right now and I really really need to do well. Sh*t. Sorry this is stupid, and prolly not even worth a post... but i wanted to say hi anyway.