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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

~Kaytee~ 13-06-2009 10:59 AM

Thanks Zowie! I have one essay and 2 exams left.. >.< Glad your feeling better, even just a bit =] Hope you can find something to do, I'm going to start to write notes on Plato >.<

Woohoo banana! Have fun today!

youonlyliveonce 13-06-2009 11:31 AM

i had a four hour session with my OT yesterday it was my first one really sice leaving inpatient. we spoke quite in depth really. i was ok well i was there i cut once. i felt numb. i saw my friend in the afternoon and just broke down i cried like a baby i was so embarrassed even though she doesn't care if i do i felt really bad i cut when she went inside 2.:( and then i told her i was gonna die and that she cudnt help i hurt her so much. when i got back to the house i started to od. feel awful 2day. feel so drained. my OT wants me to write a letter trying to get all my emotions out. its 2 hard oi cant write it. it hurts 2 much. now im on my own till weds. she said if i need her to leave a message at her office but i dont want to ask 2 much off her. i don't wanna phone the crisis team cus i wud have to explain and i havent got the energy. i dont know what to do plus i hate talking on phones. but i cant cope. its 2 hard sorry to go on.

hides in the corner.

shadowedseraph 13-06-2009 01:12 PM

*hugs rockaroni* rant away we;re here to listen *hugs wildly insane* I wanted too but i didnt incase my mum saw, and i couldnt bear it if she knew how bad i am actually feeling it would upset her so much, *hugs to zowie* you could just do what i do and drift around the internet looking up interesting stuff :) *hugs big bear* good luck with your studying *hugs banana* have fun today! *hugs cheryl* do you think if you wrote down how you are feeling you could read it to the crisis team, or go to a and e *more genlte hugs* sweetie we want you to look after yourself

Strawberry.Bananas 13-06-2009 02:03 PM

Hi all, I bear birthday cake!
*places magic cake on the table. Suitable for all!*
I know I've not been very supportive the last few weeks but hope you're all ok!
*Hugs* for all that need them. :)
xxx

zowie 13-06-2009 02:50 PM

Katie - To be honest I'm so bored that I'd rather be doing an essay than sitting around wishing I could smoke!! :P

Cheryl - Writing a letter can be really helpful. It really is a good way of expressing yourself in exactly the right words. Even if you don't show the letter to anyone, just reading back over it sometimes helps.

Vicki - Is it your birthday per chance?

-----

Just went and did a little bit of shopping just to keep myself busy. I actually did my hair and make up just to go to the shops - I suppose it's a good thing that I had the energy to do that.

shadowedseraph 13-06-2009 04:20 PM

*hugs Vicki* nom nom nom birthday cake, happy birthday to you!

Zowie - Congratulations on getting out, let alone doing your hair and makeup! its more than i can manage at the moment :)

rockaroni 13-06-2009 07:59 PM

Thanks so much everyone. I texted him yesterday, but got no reply. Today's been a much better day. Handed in a bunch of CVs at a load of pubs, hopefully something will come of it.

Arwen, are you trying to stop smoking again, or just not doing it due to lack of funds? Either way, I'm glad you got out yesterday :)

*noms cake* if it's your birthday Vicki, have a good one :)

Damnation. 13-06-2009 09:38 PM

I.

Am.

BOILED

[Fog] 13-06-2009 09:48 PM

zowie - glad to hear you had a good day and got out, well done! How's the no smoking going today?

BB - hope the essay's going away, I don't envy you there!

Cheryl - as has already been said it might be useful to write things down. Or even just print off your post on here. If things are getting too much it might be an idea to call the crisis team, I don't know about your team but I can ask mine to come to my house because I don't really like talking about things on the phone. In any case I hope you are ok and we are all here for you. Take care sweetie. *Big safe cuddles*

Vicki - happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to Vickiiiiiiiiiiiiii, happy birthday to you! Hope you've had a good day :-)

Rockaroni - well done with the CVs, it's hard work applying for jobs. Hope something comes up for you. Hope you're feeling better today?

.............

I've had a good day today. I threw up my lunch which isn't good. But the afternoon has been wonderful, my boyfriend bought me flowers and we wandered around and chatted and got a drink and then I started getting all paranoid and anxious so we went back to his house and chilled out there and it was just such a nice day :laugh: Bit scared that Anouk's gonna be pissed off as I'm happy but I'm just trying to stay distracted!

Night all xxx

youonlyliveonce 13-06-2009 10:00 PM

thanks for all your support. everything has just got too much. it hurts so much. i might try phoning 2morrow i just dont want my mum to find out. they said i cud go to them. its were i usually have my appointments with my cpn and psych.

shadowedseraph 13-06-2009 10:23 PM

*gentle hugs cheryl* i think phoning them would be a good idea, arranging to go and see them sounds even better, especially if (like me) your no good on the phone!

Damnation. 13-06-2009 11:11 PM

Totally mnot drunk.

Compeltely sover. Yes <.<;

realflifefaerie 13-06-2009 11:28 PM

*curls up in the corner*

Sorry guys am rubbish tonight.

~Kaytee~ 14-06-2009 02:25 AM

Pmsl.. I'm such an idiot.. I've just realised BB is ME! LOL.

I think I can do this. I slept in this morning so I'm a bit grr at myself for wasting some of the morning but I shall be off soon to finish this and do some revising. So behind >.<

*cuddles secrets* hope your ok xxxx dont be sorry take care of yourself x

Damnation. 14-06-2009 03:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eclectic*a (Post 1684434)
im attempting to get drunk lol not been merry in a while.

But its so WAAAARM IN HERE.

*Sees your status* >__< Pleaaase try and stay safe. I just wish I knew what to say, I'm sorry I can't be more help. I love you and I don't want to lose you

shadowedseraph 14-06-2009 10:29 AM

Morning all on the ward *hugs to all that want them* anyone for orange juice? freshly squeezed of course! :)

~Kaytee~ 14-06-2009 11:08 AM

OJ! Nom nom.

*hugs shadowed* how are you?

zowie 14-06-2009 02:41 PM

Katie, I'm trying to quit but it's mostly because I want to save my cash not because I'm tired of smoking.
I bought a ten pack last night which was silly, but I think I can still do without cigarettes even after that.
*Crawls into a hole to nurse her hangover*

[Fog] 14-06-2009 03:52 PM

*Whispers for the benefit of anyone with a hangover!*

Hey guys, hope you all got through the night ok and are feeling ok today. I've had quite a quiet day today not been doing too much but I feel alright and relatively calm. Only ate a salad for lunch so that's good.

Hugs and loves to all xxx

shadowedseraph 14-06-2009 05:14 PM

*hugs BigBear* I'm not alright but im putting on the bright face, crisis team told my mum i'd been feeling suicidal. I wish they hadnt she doenst need the stress

*hugs zowie* Never mind, with giving up anything there are slip ups

*hugs Banana* Glad your feeling better

[Fog] 14-06-2009 09:13 PM

*Hugs Shadowed* That sucks, but maybe it would be good to have the extra support?

*Hugs Eclectic*a* Hope you're ok.

I've had an ok, quiet. Just ironing and a bike ride and that kind of thing. Mum made some really nice cake and I had some and then some more and purged it. It was just such nice cake. Why can't I bloody eat and enjoy it like a normal person??

*Bangs head on wall*

shadowedseraph 14-06-2009 09:52 PM

*hugs banana* are you seeing someone about your eating love? it might help

~*Rainbow*~ 14-06-2009 10:12 PM

Okay so now its hit me!!! now i feel the pain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

realflifefaerie 14-06-2009 10:44 PM

*hugs Big bear* I hope you got everything you needed to do done. Take it in baby steps.

*hugs Damnation*

*hugs shadowed* its a bit late for OJ, how are you?

*hugs zowie* I hope your hangover eased, and whatever the reason giving up smoking is still positive!

*hugs banana* I can understand that feeling, however focus on the positives. Im around if you want to talk.

*hugs Eclectica*offers blanket?

*hugs Rainbow* are you ok?

I'm really not coping at all, my mother's made a comment thats really triggered me to the extent I want to fast for ages. I just don't know, I want to hide forever.

~Kaytee~ 14-06-2009 11:44 PM

Okies.. just thought I'd let you know I did the essay! not the best, I didn't even reach the word limit oops. But I'm printing it out then I'm off. I'll be back in a few hours and will reply properly. Take care xx

shadowedseraph 15-06-2009 10:01 AM

*hugs secrets* im sorry your mum upset you is there anything we can do to help?

*hugs BigBear* Well done on the essay

*hugs rainbow* how are you feeling today hun

*hugs to anyy others on the ward that want them*

-----

I feel shi**y when will this feeling go away, i just want to feel normal for a change is that too much to ask?

youonlyliveonce 15-06-2009 11:00 AM

hugs secrets how u feeling today.

phone my OT this morning as she said if i needed her to phone i left a message she will be in ward round all morning.im just being silly i shud be able to cope. i cancelled going to a friends bday lunch today because i cudnt face them im such a bad friend. sorry just wasting every1s time.

shadowedseraph 15-06-2009 11:24 AM

*hugs Cheryl* your not wasting everyones time if you can;t cope at the moment then you've done a very sensible thing in asking for help, and your not a bad friend, im sure your mate would understand that your not feeling well and as such dont want to go, its no different than having flu and not being able to go *more hugs*

zowie 15-06-2009 02:00 PM

It's so bloody hot.

[Fog] 15-06-2009 04:39 PM

Rainbow - are you ok?

Secrets - sorry to hear about you feeling triggered, I hope you feel better today and got through yesterday. Hypocrite alert but try and keep eating. The last thing you want is for your body to shut down. Even if it's only little bits.

BB - well done!! That's great news, feel proud of yourself :laugh:

Cheryl - you're not wasting anyone's time. And don't feel bad about not going to the lunch. If you're not feeling good, you're allowed to cancel :-) Hope you're feeling better now.

Eclectic*a - hope you're ok and that you've recovered from the OD. Sounds really busy and scary in your head and I hope everyone quietens down in there. Take care sweetie.

Shadowed - what's up, are you ok? About getting help with my eating... I was discharged from the psych ward a week ago and will be seeing the EIT for the first time as an outpatient on Weds so I guess I've just got to wait and see what they've got in store for me. In the psych ward they were crap with EDs and just told me off and told me to "just eat". Made it worse. But I'll just have to wait and see what help is available.

Had a bad night last night, after the cake incident I SHed in the night as punishment. But I'm doing ok today, spoke to my uni about my exam arrangements for September and did some food shopping and stuff so the day is passing by.

Hope everyone is ok xxx

shadowedseraph 15-06-2009 05:02 PM

*hugs banana* I'm sorry the psyche ward were so s*** about your ED hopefully you'll get more support now your outpatient. I'm struggling not to SH or SU at the moment each day is a real struggle, but im seeing the crisis team and they're actually being helpful which is a pleasant change from the team where i used to live!

realflifefaerie 15-06-2009 06:10 PM

I'm stressing now, something that's supposed to be fun is gonna be hard. Stupid food issues

MammaMia 16-06-2009 02:55 AM

Sorry I haven't been around for the past few days, been mainly very down, but with a few ups *nods*

Have counselling today, one big ****ing woop, NOT, so cannot be bothered. Espically as I'm still ****ing awake at 3am (well nearly). :/

shadowedseraph 16-06-2009 10:13 AM

*hugs Secrets* try not to stress honey, stressing will only make it even worse

*hugs MammaMia* Did you get any sleep?

-------

Seeing my OT today which makes me kinda happy as he listens to me

~Kaytee~ 16-06-2009 10:48 AM

Oh secrets *hugs* I know the feeling with the food issues. i hope you still manage to have fun and its not hard for you

*cuddles helen* good luck with counselling!!

shadow, hope its a good one for you :) *hugs*

---
argh I'm stressing over my uni course now =[ need to seriously think about what to do.. going to try to see a career counsellor asap.. =[

shadowedsoul 16-06-2009 11:27 AM

Argh!!!! i give up, this suck so much why dont you just shoot me now, and get it over with. im really begining to regret doing this now. and tina, please go to hell and quit, being an ass, i no that hard for you, but please you are doing my head in. so give it the hell up.

MammaMia 16-06-2009 11:44 AM

I did get some sleep :/ Not long after I wrote that post. Am awake again now. Decided to complete not go to counselling *tuts at self*

zowie 16-06-2009 03:15 PM

I'm pretty much smoking whenever I get money to do it, so I haven't quit and I don't think I will.

zowie 16-06-2009 06:24 PM

*Hugs Kat* xx

Strawberry.Bananas 16-06-2009 06:30 PM

Thanks for the birthday wishes guys!

Sorry I've not replied, turns out that my e-mail's are deciding not to come through from RYL. =/.

How is everybody?
*Hugs for those that need it*

zowie 16-06-2009 06:48 PM

I'm alright thanks Vicki, in quite a wine mood...hopefully my dad will give me some :P
How are you? How was your birthday? xx

Strawberry.Bananas 16-06-2009 08:02 PM

Hmm...be careful if you do hon!
I'm not too bad thank you. My birthday was good! Quiet, but good! :)

shadowedseraph 16-06-2009 08:47 PM

*hugs to all on the ward*

Bigbear - I had a good ot session thanks for your well wishes

zowie - If nows not the time to quit then its not the time *snuggles*

Vicki - Happy Birthday (if slightly belated)

----

Psyche from the crisis team has prescribed me new meds, time to give them a try i think.

zowie 16-06-2009 08:50 PM

Vicki - Glad you had a good birthday.

shadow - thanks. I've cut down a lot, which is good. I can now go a few days without tobacco without getting stressed, but I just can't quit. Good luck with the new meds :)

realflifefaerie 16-06-2009 10:58 PM

Can i have a corner? Please?

youonlyliveonce 16-06-2009 11:01 PM

hugs to everyone that needs it. brings tea and biscuits

well i have got an appoiintment with my OT 2moz another 4 hours its scaring me as she wants to try and see how i react to things this is scaring me as i reacted badley on friday but i guess she will be there this time. still havent done the tasks she asked for but hey. she wants to know how many times ive tried to kill myself and self harmed 2 but i cnt tell her the truth she wont be impressed argh im so scared. sorry

Damnation. 17-06-2009 12:36 AM

Had my mental health appointment (the one that I've been waiting five months for <.<) today. The woman was really nice, very easy to speak to. Talked a bit about sexual 'abuse' from school, the lack of dealing with it, lack of mother's understanding (and the woman agreed with my last counsellor - it was abuse), Mum's boyfriend getting violent, my prick of an ex 'friend' and all this.

She suggested that the void might be to do with my sleeping patterns until I told her that my sleeping patterns have been **** for three years, and the void's only been for like three months. So she's gonna get back to me with an appt for a psychiatrist, and also wants to get me an appt with a doctor to make sure I haven't ****ed up my liver with my ODs. Whoops ._.

~Kaytee~ 17-06-2009 06:24 AM

OMG.. what a day.
First of all I have my assessment next Wednesday. So that actually made me feel really good. I'm thinking YES finally some extra support. YES. I can get more help. THEN guess who we see? We see his ex. The one has a child with him. Grrrrrrr. Nothing happened. He didn't say anything. She didn't even see him. I just.. I'm so damn confused about what to do. I dont know. Why today though? I'm in the middle of studying for exams and I was JUST getting to be on a high again.. and THAT happens. Now I'm just.. uuugghh. And he feels even worse.. blahh.. sorry. No personals at the moment. Will be back later tonight *hugs all*

~Kaytee~ 17-06-2009 06:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Damnation. (Post 1691668)
Had my mental health appointment (the one that I've been waiting five months for <.<) today. The woman was really nice, very easy to speak to. Talked a bit about sexual 'abuse' from school, the lack of dealing with it, lack of mother's understanding (and the woman agreed with my last counsellor - it was abuse), Mum's boyfriend getting violent, my prick of an ex 'friend' and all this.

She suggested that the void might be to do with my sleeping patterns until I told her that my sleeping patterns have been **** for three years, and the void's only been for like three months. So she's gonna get back to me with an appt for a psychiatrist, and also wants to get me an appt with a doctor to make sure I haven't ****ed up my liver with my ODs. Whoops ._.

Glad the lady was nice. Must have been hard *hugs* I hope it helps though. Good luck with the drs. Take care x

Kahlia1981 17-06-2009 11:31 AM

*offers hugs to all*

Sorry I haven't been around it's been an emotional time.
:On Monday I had to put my little dog to sleep
:TuesdayI had surgical clinic regarding my shoulder
:Today I had pre-admission clinic and it looks like they are definitely going ahead with the surgery this time
:Next Tuesday my friend Nicole {mouse in darkness} leaves for WA
:Wednesday is my surgery then
:Thursday I have to go and get my hand looked at

It just doesn;t want to stop at the moment.

Dayna - i'm also glad the woman was nice and that you were finally able to have that appointment

Hannah - thanks for the hugs [wildly insane]


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