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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

shadowedseraph 18-06-2009 11:23 AM

*hugs to all on the ward*

*hugs zowie* thank you, not cutting is a major thing at the moment.

Got to see the crisis team psyche today, worried cos i dont know what he's going to say

Biba 18-06-2009 12:13 PM

.........

zowie 18-06-2009 03:38 PM

I just took my dad for lunch, it was lovely. I'm now very full of food and not feeling guilty :)

zowie 18-06-2009 05:26 PM

okay, now I'm feeling guilty. Why did I have to eat so much? Fatty.

*LONG RANT*
Also, my youngest sister is an absolute nightmare. Yesterday afternoon she asked to go out and play in the street and our dad said no because she needed a bath. To which she went mental, called us both loads of names, screamed, slammed doors and finally said 'im going anyway' and just walked out.
She came back about ten minutes later and appologised, and dad said 'im still punishing you'. So yet again, she goes off on one, and says 'the only reason i came back was because I couldn't find my friends, and the only reason I appologised is because I don't want to be punished!'
After a lot of shouting and swearing she calmed down, got in the bath and went to bed.
She just got home from school (dad's not here atm so I'm in charge). First thing she does is head for the cuboard (even though one of her punishements is no snacks or puddings) so I have to stop her. She starts moaning and telling me to ring dad and ask him if she's allowed a snack. I said no, because I knew what his answer would be.
Then her friend knocks on the door and she asks to go out. I can't remember if he grounded her or not so I ask her to honestly tell me. She says 'I don't remember' Which basically means he did. She screams at me for saying no and then says 'oh yeah, I'm not grounded'. So to be sure, I phone dad, and he's left his phone at home. Then it turns out (from her letting slip) he DID ground her but said if she was nice he mmight lift it after a while. So I say 'well, there's your answer, you need his permission'.
Then she says in an arrogant tone 'well I'm going anyway, I don't care.' Which is exactly what got her grounded in the first place. So I raise my voice and tell her exactly that, and that she will be in enormous trouble if she does.
She then storms into the hallway where her friend is waiting and screams 'you think you're my mother. I wish you'd stop acting like you're my mother!'
That's what really upset me. If mum were here she would have sorted her right out. She wouldn't be such a brat. Dad's too liberal. I mean, so liberal it got us on TV! He just lets her get away with everything. She's ten for christ's sake!
She's now upstairs with her friend, and I know I should send him away seeing as she's grounded, but I can't stand her bringing mum into the argument.

Okay rant over.
I completely understand if no one read that, it's very long.
Sigh.

MammaMia 18-06-2009 06:02 PM

*cuddles all*

Arwen, wow, I don't know what to say to help but I read it all, sounds like hell to deal with :(

zowie 18-06-2009 06:39 PM

Aww thank you for reading my pointless rant :)
Yeah, it's horrible. She's blaming it on me that she's not allowed to do anything even though it's her own fault and dad's decision.

Anway, things have calmed down now. x

[Fog] 18-06-2009 10:09 PM

*Leaves hugs for all* Sorry it can't be more. Head's killing, I collapsed twice today. Therapy went ok though and was so nice seeing my boyfriend. I feel so fat. Love to all xx

~Kaytee~ 19-06-2009 05:09 AM

Oh god arwen.. I was reading your rant and man, I swear I thought of my family! Thats exactly how my sister (a few years older) would react too. It's so sad and horrible coz I know that if our mum was here then she wouldnt be llike this.. or at least as bad. I know she's like this coz well one she's teenager but 2 coz she has no mum. It's so hard. I have no advice sorry :( *hugs* Don't fell guilty about eating though. Although I can't talk hm.

shadowedseraph 19-06-2009 12:28 PM

*hugs zowie* your little sister sounds like a terror, well done for sticking up to her though it must have been hard.

*hugs banana* sorry to hear about your headache sweetheart and your collapsing, do you need to see someone about it?

*hugs bigbear*

-----

Well i saw the crisis team psyche and she was really nice, much to my surprise! told me she would up my anti depressent and would think about uppiong my anti psychotic if i had any more symptoms! nice and supportive too... hurrah

shadowedsoul 19-06-2009 01:13 PM

argh!!!! i cant handle any of this anymore, people playing mind games. Iam not even sure if she even was really in the first place. even if she has dissapeared and done something stuiped. or if its the same person now. argh!!!! this is too much for me to handle. going to go sleep in a padded room. untill i can get my head toghter. sorry for this confusing and pointless post. =/

zowie 19-06-2009 02:21 PM

*Hugs HannahBanana* I feel fat too :(

Katie - I find it so sad that she was only six when mum died, and that the lack of a mother has made her this way. Thanks for reading my rant, you didn't have to :P

Shadowedseraph - Yay for helpful people! I'm glad you're getting the support you need.

*hugs shadowedsoul* Sorry, don't know what to say.

--------

I truly wish I had a job. I have absolutely no money even though I was paid yesterday. It all went on rent and taking dad for lunch. I really want to go to the pub, just for one drink, so I can say hi to my friends. I haven't seen them in ages. It's my mum's birthday on Sunday and they are all her old friends, I really want to spend some time with them and have a drink for my mum.

realflifefaerie 19-06-2009 02:27 PM

*hugs zowie* try not to worry too much about it. Little sisters are often like that anyway, it is also part of growing up.

*hugs Mammamia* how are you?

*hugs banana* I'm glad therapy went well and you got ot spend time with your boyfriend. Hope your feeling better today.

*hugs Bigbear*

*hugs shadowedseraph* I'm glad that the crisis team psych was nice and you're getting support.

*hugs shadowedsoul* don't be sorry, if you want to talk more I'm around.

I'm feeling really lonely and isolated today. I've managed to eat which is an achievement but I'm back to feeling guilty, I just don't know. *sighs*

zowie 19-06-2009 02:47 PM

*Hugs Secrets* Well done for eating :)

I'm being a right scrounge. Have texted my dad and my friend to see if either of them could lend me enough for a pint. My friend just texted back and said she's got no cash on her, so I don't think she'll even be going for a drink. Maybe I should stop being desperate for a single drink and sleep all day.

shadowedseraph 19-06-2009 04:22 PM

*hugs secrets* well done for eating dont feel guilty

*hugs zowie* sleep is good especially if you are tired sorry i have nothing more supportive to say i suck today

*hugs shadowedsoul* if you want to talk more we are all around

zowie 19-06-2009 05:49 PM

After my last post I had to go pick my sister up from school as she'd bashed her head. At first, when we got home, she was really milking it. And she'd read the letter the school gave her about signs to look out for when someone hits their head, and was pretending that her eye was twitching. Annoying!
So haven't had a nap, she's watching TV and I don't want to go to bed.

youonlyliveonce 19-06-2009 09:46 PM

hugs secrets well done for eating.

today wow had an appointment with my cpn that was ok. he wants to see me again next fri as my OT is going on holiday and he wanted to make sure i was ok. then went to my best friends uni and was in a hyper and met all her friends which was nice. she has sum really nice friends there. however walking back to her uni got a flashback, so now really struggling wow. only had 3 hours sleep in the last 48 hours that is killing me. and got first day back at work 2moz ontop of feeling suicidal great. has been a crazy day

[Fog] 19-06-2009 10:37 PM

Hey guys

*Hugs and loves for all*

*Distributes calorie free chocolates*

Been feeling a little better today but not great. Done great with food and did some walking too so feel a little less fat. Also went with my mum to the Open University library this afternoon and looked at the courses for 3rd year and I'm quite excited about it.

Currently trying to work out what to do for my birthday. My plan so far is spend the morning and early afternoon doing not much with family, then spend the afternoon and evening with my boyfriend doing not much lol. It's pretty tricky... Obviously don't wanna go for a meal, cinemas makes psychosis bad, going out I can't drink or take drugs any more, and generally places in public make me really anxious so kinda limits things! Can't even eat bloody birthday cake :( Urgh.

Hugs to all xxx

realflifefaerie 19-06-2009 11:10 PM

Secrets is not a happy secrets, stupid ex boyfriend who is determined to wreck my happiness.

shadowedsoul 19-06-2009 11:11 PM

okay might have been wrong. but thats even worse. damnit why cant my life be simple.if its not one thing its the other.keep having these panic attacks and there doing my head in.and these really sore pain near my heart. which are freaking me out. sorry in a whiney mood. =/

HopeFades 20-06-2009 12:37 AM

i can so relate 2 wat u have just sed shadowed soul i keep gettin the same pains in my chest and my heart like flutters its really weird, i know its probly related 2 anxiety but it seems 2 happen at the most randomest of times, times wen i dnt even feel like im even stressed like out in a nightclub or shoppin or watchin a film, its rediculous, i wish i cud find a way of getting rid of them


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