*hugs back* I'm struggling.

*hugs* for anyone who wants them.

Annie: Hang in there chicky. I believe in you no matter what. *hugs*

*curls up in a corner with her bear*

Thank you Kahlia.

Argh!!! Work is doing my head in. Just ******* over it. Don't listen to me then. Ignore policy. Screw it.

Annie: *hugs* I wish I could do more for you, but I'm always around if you need something.

*hugs* for anyone who wants/needs them.

For a change I'm sharing some positive news, but I still feel like ****...
I'm going to have overnight leave on Saturday and only have about a week left in hospital.
Now I'm going to go cry in a corner

Yay for you Kahlia!!!
i think im in a mixed episode. impulsivity. disturbed sleep. whispers. intrusive thoughts, specifically about how im worthless. more SI.
every so often tho, like right now, i get clarity without emotion. i have insight into how im thinking and behaving. its crystal clear that im unwell, despite the fact i am being good with my meds. there just is no motivation to do anything about it.
*cookies and hugs for those who want them*

Annie: I totally get you there. A lack of motivation can be a real pain to deal with. For me it's getting harder and harder to turn up to the physio gym twice every day, but I keep going because I have so few left.

I'm out on my (first) overnight leave with only one more week to go - providing tonight goes well. We went to see a play my parents were in and got Thai food for dinner. Mum even told me to audition for the local production of Wicked.

Now we wait to see how the night goes...

Struggling with constant urges, failing at resisting them. When I'm not consumed with those my mind turns darker. Not coping.
I have one positive thing. I want a platonic real life snuggle buddy. I don't want sex or a relationship. I just want someone to snuggle with on a regular basis. So yeah I have a positive thing that I want. Doubt I'll get it, but I want it.

I'm sorry I haven't kept up here. Life has just seemed to get in the way. I hope everyone is doing alright. <3

Just coming by to crash for a bit. I need a safe place to stay and try to get some (hopefully restful) sleep. *curls up with her blanket*

On the positive side I've been home from hospital for 2 weeks, I've had support workers since leaving hospital and cyclone Debbie skipped us by heading to the south.

Unfortunately the GP is bei a prickelnd, my pain is completely uncontrolled, the heat is unbearable, our air-conditioning unit broke and my mobility is going downhill.

Right now it'd be so easy to just throw everything away so I'm just going to curl up in a corner and cry.

*hugs for Kat and Kahlia*
I'm considering making a doctor's appointment. Dont see a counsellor until the 11th.

Annie: *hugs*

After Easter I'm dumping my GP - as in not ever going back to see him. Now I just have to find a replacement. Preferably before I need a new referral to my psychiatrist...

Between now and then I'm just going to curl up and cry.

Hi everyone. Would anyone like some purrs as my cats seem to be full of them right now?

i need to hide here please?
 

i cant deal with anything... to be fair all i need is a really tight hug,
i feel so ****ing useless.

*hugs* to all who need one <3

Life is beyond chaotic. I'm so stressed out I'm getting sick over it. Things just seem so overwhelming right now. I watched a movie last night, which I'd seen before, but for some reason it triggered me. Just a bunch of ugh.

I'll just color in the corner and wait for summer to pass and the cooler weather to come back around. Maybe then I'll be ready to adult again.

*big Hugs for those folks who need them*

I am checking in now,
i can't explain how i feel but i just need a safer place,
i am gonna hide here and just drink tea and eat chicken :P

Kemicalwarfare: Do you mind if I call you Kazimierz? *hugs* I hope you are safe, or in a safe place, at the moment. Enjoy your tea and chicken. :)

Kat: I hate it when life just wants to throw everything it has at you. I'm hoping you have managed to get some peace and/or rest from the chaos. I might be ready to adult again when the weather warms up over here. *safe hugs if you want/need/can accept them*

*hugs to anyone who wants/ needs them*

So much is happening right now that I'm struggling to keep up. Between pain, life and my head I need a break. If anyone wants me I'll be hiding in my pillow fort.

i don't mind at all :) still busy enjoying my food... i kind of have too, but could i possibly join you in your pillow fort i need somewhere squishy to sleep tonight?

*waves* in general, feeling better. Some down days, Lotsa irritability. Hey, is it normal that after a long term relationship, you go through a stage of contemplating how many things you overlooked or put up with that were really irritating, and just go through rage at yourself for doing so? I've never been so angry about an ex before, or at myself for being such a doormat. I've had long term relationships before, but never have I just sat there and gone, "well, normally, if anyone did that to me, I'd yell at them, so why'd I let it go?"
So with all this irritability, I'm wondering if it's related to the meds, valdoxan being typed as an antidepressant with the normal warning of be careful with bipolar cos it might tip them to mania, or if it's genuine irritability caused by the frustrations abundant in my life right now.

Kazimierz: My pillow fort is your pillow fort. Feel free to drop in any time.

Annie: It probably is quite normal, especially if it's a long-term relationship or you invested a lot of emotion/yourself into it. With regards to the irritability, obviously I can't say it's one or the other but keep in mind they could both be contributing. Regardless of the cause I hope it settles down soon. Here if you need a chat hun.

My husband was loving and caring so decided to give me his cold. I'm going to curl up with a cup of tea until I feel better...