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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

MammaMia 27-05-2008 01:15 AM

*hides*

Gah I shouldn't hide tbh.

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 02:09 AM

*hugs* why shouldn't you hide luv? No worries, sometimes hiding is needed.

*retreats to her corner with her wine* mmm alcohol

MammaMia 27-05-2008 02:32 AM

I want alcohol :(

Meh I can't remember why i was hiding now. :P

*coutinues to hide*

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 02:39 AM

*snuggles Helen and offers her some wine* I'm sorry luv, I wish I could fix it *snuggles*

I wish I could fix it for me as well but *shrug* at least we all have each other :-)

Auburn Shadow 27-05-2008 02:50 AM

*hugs you both*

Take care guys. I'm here if you wanna talk

MammaMia 27-05-2008 02:56 AM

Ally, I wish I could fix it for both of us =D

Thanks Auburn :)

*hides with Ally & wine :P*

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 03:33 AM

Ugh, I breath and I taste like alcohol... And only four glasses of wine and I'm about to be sick... Was hoping to finish all six but not sure I can even finish five. I can't even drink well, for crying out loud! What a **** up

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 03:37 AM

Correction... Have been sick:pinch: good lord I can't even do that right:crying:
Well I know I can cut... Probably gonna do that soon...

MammaMia 27-05-2008 04:11 AM

*gently hugs Ally*

BoundNoMore 27-05-2008 04:12 AM

*gently hugs Ally and Helen*

Pomegranate 27-05-2008 04:36 AM

Alexx? *hugs* Where have you gone sweetheart? I'm glad you didn't jump...we would miss you! I think you are worth more though than chasing after someone who doesn't appreciate how wonderful you are all the time. Stay safe hun xx

Ally, please be careful and maybe don't drink anymore? Maybe? *Offers gentle hugs and some water* xx

Hope you are doing ok Helen, you are doing really well ignoring the urges, keep going! *hugs*

*hugs Jess, Amanda, Auburn and anyone else who needs them*

*pokes again for Chloe, Susan, Zowie, Callie and anyone else may have forgotten*

How are you doing today Chloe? *leaves bundles of b&j icecream and coffee to aid those studying*

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 05:00 AM

*snuggles Helen, Amanda, Emma, Alexx, Hana, and anyone else that needs/wants one*

Oh. Wow. I was BAD:pinch: just drove while intoxicated:Foot In Mouth: was very careful and all, made it there and back alright but... Good lord, what an idiot am I ?!

*retreats to her corner with her blanket and... Tools :pinch:* **** me:crying:

Pomegranate 27-05-2008 05:53 AM

Ally! Please don't do that again sweetie. Where did you go? *hugs* Please be careful hun :( xx

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 06:01 AM

No worries Emma, I just went to the store... About a ten minute drive from my apartment. I was careful... I mean, I guess driving while intoxicated isn't exactly being careful but... *shrug* who gives a **** any way..?

*curls up in her corner and tries to sleep*

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 06:42 AM

:crying:
No scheduled session until next Monday. He's got one Wednesday (crisis time I think) at 09:00... But I've never been in during one of those times (well except the week they called the county guy in and then I got put in the schedule there). I don't know whether or not I can just stop in (will someone else be there? Will I not be able to get in?) or should I email him and ask if I can be put in that spot? This is my fault for not taking my meds... Feeling awful... And weird... My affect is rather like it was the day he decided it would be a good idea to call the county folks in and see if I should go to hospital... I certainly don't want to go:crying:... I can't wait to cut but I'm afraid I might go too deep (as I am planing on cutting on my wrist again... bleeds well) and I don't want to have to go to the ER... They'll keep me there... :crying: **** it :crying:

Sorry to ramble on like this...

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 07:03 AM

And I am alone:crying: damn time difference:crying:

Jetforce 27-05-2008 09:52 AM

*cuddles ally*

Yeah, i hate the time difference....:-( sorry u don't feel too great, maybe u should take ur meds again??

effervescence 27-05-2008 11:11 AM

hey ally.
i would email him and ask to be put in that spot - sounds like you need all the time you can get. i also think u should talk to him about your meds and work something out cos this isnt really working atm is it hun.
please don't drive drunk again! if you hurt someone im sure they would give a ****!
please try not to go too deep. is there something you can use that you know won't go too deep? i know you want to cut but you know it wont really help in the long run, and you said you don't want to go to a +e.
trying to sleep sounds good.
*covers ally with a blanket and settles down to whisper quietly to jem in the corner*

2 days till therapy......2 days till therapy.....2 days.....

dark_light 27-05-2008 11:23 AM

*hugs ally*
sorry you were alone, stupid time difffernce!
I think you should go for that appt if you can, sounds like you need some suport. Hope things better today

I have to go have a bath cos the shower is broken and my hair is really greasy and i feel really weierd and panicky ugh! Is there a shower in the denial tent? like a power shower?

effervescence 27-05-2008 11:30 AM

of course there is a power shower! the denial tent has everything!

how are you jo?

dark_light 27-05-2008 11:41 AM

I'm feeling really panicky today, no one would believe me until they did my pulse and it was 125.
I am moving into the denial tent permanently with my power shower and luxury shower products.

How are you? least its only 2 days now

effervescence 27-05-2008 12:40 PM

yeah, i know, but its getting harder and harder to be "good" :(

are you panicky for any reason? *gives you hot chocolate*

dark_light 27-05-2008 03:06 PM

*pounces on chocolate* thanks needed that!

You've done so well just keep going for 2 days we're all here hon, i know how hard it is and i know 2 daays can seem neverending but you can do it!

I'm panicky cos i woke up panicky, then i saw my dr who talked about when i go back to the hostel, i can't call it home, and i really don't want to go back there. My flat won't be ready for another 5/6 mths. Not that they are looking at discharge yet anyway. Its like i don't want to be in hospital but theres nowhere i do want to be :(

blondiebear 27-05-2008 03:10 PM

Yesterday we saw some great ruins at Chaco Canyon. Only some one I know hot heat sick, not enough to drink. Still it was absolutely awesome. My husband has planned for us to see more ruins today.

I am a week and a half from home and have a tooth ache. My husband was good enough to look it over for me and sees no evidence of a cavity. It is off and on, so I'll just have to remember to eat on the other side. I'm also nervous cause if it needs a filling it will be my first in 20 years! oooh it hurts.

MammaMia 27-05-2008 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pomegranate (Post 794435)
Hope you are doing ok Helen, you are doing really well ignoring the urges, keep going! *hugs*

Ignoing what urges....:notsure: If you mean cutting...then you're wrong :crying: *hugs Emma*

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~*forever_lost*~ (Post 794448)
*snuggles Helen, Amanda, Emma, Alexx, Hana, and anyone else that needs/wants one*

Oh. Wow. I was BAD:pinch: just drove while intoxicated:Foot In Mouth: was very careful and all, made it there and back alright but... Good lord, what an idiot am I ?!

*retreats to her corner with her blanket and... Tools :pinch:* **** me:crying:

*snuggles Ally* Don't drive again when you're intoxicated please? Damm the tme difference indeed.

Jo, how you feeling?

Chloe, hope you're hanging on sweetheart! xxx

Susan, sounds like fun :)

*hugs Jermery, Jo, Chloe, Susan, Callie, Alex, Jess and anyone else who needs 'em*

Jetforce 27-05-2008 03:39 PM

*huge hugs helen*

I read ur post in Arrrgh, i hope ur ok there...
Have u patched urself up yet? Hope so...try and tc of urself xx

MammaMia 27-05-2008 04:54 PM

*huge hugs back*

Nah I haven't patched it up tbh. Might put a plaster over it....

dark_light 27-05-2008 05:44 PM

I'm... just about ok with meds for the panic.

Hells please take care and patch yourself up *hugs*

At my dads so internet working!!!

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 06:02 PM

You people and my meds, lol. Today will make it a week, I'll see about taking them after that. Just an experiment gone awry *shrug*

Oh. Chloe, you're right... I'd been sick and felt much less intoxicated so wasn't worried about hurting myself or anyone else but you're right... They'ed give a **** and I'd become even more nuts than I already am:pinch:

Chloe, two more days luv, you're doing so well. lol is it strange that I am 'excited' for you that it's two days now? *snuggles*s

Blondie-mom, I'm sorry to hear about your tooth ache :-( I hope it goes away soon *hugs*. It sounds like you're trip is a lot of fun otherwise though.

Helen, you ok there luv? How bads the cut? *snuggles*

Jo *massive hugs* wish I knew what to say to make things better. To be sure I shouldn't be talking with my aversion to hospital but I'm sure if they're keeping you it's for a good reason, for 'your own good' as it were. No help, I know, sorry.

Jeremy, happy birthday :-) hope all is well hun and you've manahed to get some sleep.

Hmmm, I'll whine later, lol, lectures gonna start

MammaMia 27-05-2008 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dark_light (Post 795623)
I'm... just about ok with meds for the panic.

Hells please take care and patch yourself up *hugs*

At my dads so internet working!!!

Yay for internet working, even if it is at your dads. :hop: *hugs Jo lots* Everyone keeps telling me to patch it up....no point even putting plaster over it...atm anyway!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~*forever_lost*~ (Post 795670)
Helen, you ok there luv? How bads the cut? *snuggles*

*snuggles Ally* It's not too bad at the moment.....I'm not okay *cries*

dark_light 27-05-2008 06:09 PM

I'll shut up about it then:)

Whats up hon?

MammaMia 27-05-2008 06:21 PM

Sorry Jo if I sounded rude. :)

Oh just people pissing me off because they can't get the simple messgae of "I don't want you as my friend and leave me alone"

That's just one of the things, I wrote a bit of ranty post in my thread if you wanna see? :) x

dark_light 27-05-2008 06:27 PM

Well at least you are putting yourself first thats good. i had people like that pestering me on facebook and stuff so i blocked them now.

zowie 27-05-2008 06:40 PM

*joins ally and helen in the corner with wine*
I feel horrible.

MammaMia 27-05-2008 06:52 PM

Jo, yeah I guess it is good :)

Zowie, what's wrong sweetheart?

Ugh. My mum is doing my head in >.< I am wearing my armwarmers again today. No comment yesterday but today she automatically asked if I'd been cutting my hand again. I said no...(forgetting there's a cut on my hand- which was an accident tho)...and she asked anywhere else...and I went nooo. She's like good cus you don't wanna be doing that blah de blah. WTF does it matter if I have? :S Course me forgets she wants me to finish trying clothes on which will bare my entire arm. Godamm >.< I'll try them on when she's out I guess...and hope it's looking more better on Thursday when I go swimming.

**** why do I forget this important situations...>.<

dark_light 27-05-2008 06:57 PM

*hugs zowie*
Whats up hun

helen mums are just like that, i think they are sent to try us it like a rule of the universe or something :)

MammaMia 27-05-2008 06:59 PM

Jo, I think you're right hun. I really do. LOL! I mean I love her to bits and we're pretty close. But I'm still uncomfortable with her knowing bits about my "bad side" as I call it...she still doesn't really understand how to deal with my self harm. I wish she just ignored it tbh. >_<

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 07:22 PM

I've got three papers due the end of this week and I am SO not even close to done with any of them. I've got lectures to attend and work to go to every day this week... I am exhausted and I just don't know how I'm going to get these done...

And I don't know if I want to try and get in to see my therapist tomorrow... actually I know I don't want to... but I'll email him anyway I guess...

What I REALLY want to do..? Go home, climb into bed and sleep forever:crying: damn it all to hell

Sorry everyone is not doing too well... even more sorry I'm so useless atm...

dark_light 27-05-2008 07:27 PM

Helen - i know its easier when people just ignore rather than say the wrong thing, my mum has this weird fascination and always wants to see and i hate people seeing.

Ally - maybe seeing someone will help, can you get extensions on your papers? does seem a lot to have on.

zowie 27-05-2008 07:54 PM

I just wrote my partner a letter, because he said he wants to be single for a while (long story - There's a thread in vets support about it). Writing it's really drained me.
Plus I went to a funeral today which bought me down.
And I know that tonight I'm going to break my one month free of SH.

dark_light 27-05-2008 08:05 PM

Aww zowie sounds like you've had a tough day, maybe an early night would help? or is there anything that will help you not to sh?

........................................
i've just eaten too much now i feel fat and sick :(

zowie 27-05-2008 08:08 PM

I don't think there is. Now I've got it in my head, I really need to. I've worked out that I can just do one arm and wear a bandage to work and say I sprained it.
I think I'm going to go do it now.

I know what it feels like after eating too much. I hope you don't feel too awful hun xxx

dark_light 27-05-2008 08:13 PM

I know that feeling, its kind of where i am so don't really know what to say but please take care and stay safe as you can sweets
we're here if you wanna talk xxx
plus remember your one month! try to hold on to that

MammaMia 27-05-2008 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dark_light (Post 795916)
Helen - i know its easier when people just ignore rather than say the wrong thing, my mum has this weird fascination and always wants to see and i hate people seeing.

God yeah. I mean I don't mind say Jane asking cus I know she won't push it. But my gwad nmy family are far too pushy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by zowie (Post 795991)
I just wrote my partner a letter, because he said he wants to be single for a while (long story - There's a thread in vets support about it). Writing it's really drained me.
Plus I went to a funeral today which bought me down.
And I know that tonight I'm going to break my one month free of SH.

*snuggles* I hope writing did help somehow sweetheart. I hope the funeral wasn't too bad *hugs* Just remember all the good times yea? I do hope you don't cut but I know how hard it is to resist when times are real ****.

Quote:

Originally Posted by dark_light (Post 796026)
i've just eaten too much now i feel fat and sick :(

Sammmme :(

zowie 27-05-2008 08:22 PM

I've just ruined my month free of SH.

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 08:23 PM

*snuggles Zowie, Jo, and Helen*

Understand the feeling fat after eating too much... and how silly it feels at the same time when I realise that my 'too much' isn't too much at all :pinch:

Jo, can't ask fo r an extension, I've known about these papers most of the term... it's my own damn fault that I'm trying to do them all at once the week they are due :eek:

Please be careful Zowie hun

Ugh, can't I just go home and hide and make this all go away? There's no way I'm going to be able to get these done, I'm too tired to pull the all-nighters I'd need to to get them finished in time

Hopeless, absolutely hopeless

~*forever_broken*~ 27-05-2008 08:24 PM

*snuggles Zowie* please take care of it luv

zowie 27-05-2008 08:26 PM

*Hides in the corner and cries*

MammaMia 27-05-2008 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zowie (Post 796087)
I've just ruined my month free of SH.

*gentle hugs* Please take care of it hun. xx

dark_light 27-05-2008 08:28 PM

Zowie look after yourself *huggles*


i am stupid cos i have a blade hidden and i know i will do it tonight, i need to. i neaerly did it earlier but the nurses got the razor from me. but i need to do it, neeeed to.


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