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Snuffles 18-01-2009 03:04 AM

Thanks, had to cancel our appt before xmas coz I had no money to get there (she's the uni counsellor) and yeah... hope I can see her sometime soon =)

Night Ravyn, hope you have a good sleep *hugs*

zowie 18-01-2009 11:25 AM

My cat keeps dribbling on the keyboard :|

ravynsoul 18-01-2009 12:41 PM

Good morning all [i know it's later for a lot of you; but it's morning here for me]

Zowie - glad to hear you had fun the other night; lol pets are funny like that.. my rats try to climb on the keyboard too.

Katie - Thanks! Hope you're day is going good today.

Hope everyone else is okish. *leaves hugs*

MammaMia 18-01-2009 01:00 PM

Afternoon all :)

The weather was TERRIBLE las night wasn't it? I had to wait in it for a bus (yes I was in the shelter but still!!) and was peterfied and the bus wasn't coming for ages (as I had to get off desperately to do a wee) so in the end I got fed up and caught a taxi, wasn't too bad in price for once!!! But luckily my boots although they got wet....I couldn't feel it xD

Ugh today I'm just like =/ I was so happy friday night, so hyper all of yesterday and today I'm just like...okay. Dreams didn't help, godammit.

ravynsoul 18-01-2009 01:04 PM

*hugs Helen* Hope today gets better than okay for you. Did you want to talk about your dreams?

wildly insane 18-01-2009 01:40 PM

aww I love rats, I had such a lovely one...want a rat, and a snake, although not in the same viv obviously ;) although my dad did once fall asleep with the rat out and not realising the cat was in the room, luckily the cat was also asleep. can't have pets in the house plus at least one of my housemates would freak at either of those fantastic little creatures.

*hugs Ravynsoul* hope things are better today

*hugs Helen* mood swings suck, hope the day gets better.

*leaves popcorn and cheesy movies, have job applications to write :P*

Mary Anne 18-01-2009 02:47 PM

Bleugh, I just wrote a big post and my compter crashed, *leaves hugs for everyone*

xx

MammaMia 18-01-2009 03:21 PM

crying.
sorry.
I can't please everyone.
I finally realise you can never.
*sighs*

Eclectica 18-01-2009 03:58 PM

*Hugs MammaMia tightly*

Lol. I took my stitches out. I'm stupid and clever.

zowie 18-01-2009 07:08 PM

I feel like screaming, crying, cutting. Anything.
I was completely right. I asked my 'best friend' if she wanted to come out with me next weekend and she told me that she was busy with everyone else, all the people who are supposed to be my friends. So I texted the guy whos house it was going on at and asked him straight out why I wasn't invited.
He told me that last time I was invited over I got drunk, slept with X and then accused him of rape. X is the guy that started having sex with me while I was asleep. But I hadn't told anyone the truth about that night except my 'best friend', so I asked her why she told everyone what I'd said and if that was why everyone was avoiding me. She texted back 'everyone's just fed up with your behaviour'.
**** them.

Eclectica 18-01-2009 07:26 PM

*Ub0r hugs for Zowie* So sorry to hear it. Please stay safe. But you don't need people like that in your life, they're really not worth it. If friends will put you down n stuff about important issues, then screw them.

Lol, mums been discussing with people my lack of eating. Why the hell?

Mary Anne 18-01-2009 08:20 PM

Zowie *hugs* I agree with Kat that you don't need people like that (but I see that they are your friends and you don't want to loose people in your life - how I would feel anyway). The image of your cat dribbling on the keyboard made me smile :) Mine likes to sit on the keyboard!

Kat *hugs* hope your mum is doing it in a nice caring way

Helen *hugs hugs* so sorry you are down

Wildy Insane *hugs* was good to hug Morph even tho I could not ride him, he is prone to mud fever too (pink skin), know how your mum feels - washing and picking scabs! How did the applications go?

Ravyn *hugs* how are you getting on? I keep seeing posts from you but I never seem to spot one saying how you are.

*Hugs Snuffles* how are you holding up?

*Hugs Secrets* if I remember right you have another exam tomorrow good luck *leaves Secrets a good luck charm*

*hugs Dayna* how you doing? Hope you are feeling better

*leaves hugs for Kahlia (how are you?) Jetforce, KDoll and anybody else checking in*

Had a quiet day doing housework.
Had the first scary night since living alone - there was a fight outside and someone banging on my door at 1am - I hid under the covers!
Sundays are alwasy a bit of a downer for me as I am alone.

x

Eclectica 18-01-2009 08:28 PM

Not sure about it, really. She just said "Yea, I;ve been talking to Ken about how you don't eat much now..." And left it at that, which I dunno what to make of it. I'm just not hungry anymore.

MammaMia 18-01-2009 08:31 PM

*returns hugs given to me today*

I'll be fine again eventually. I just have to ask for help and I'm avoiding it. :S

Auburn Shadow 18-01-2009 08:37 PM

*hugs everyone* I've read through everything since I last posted, but I'm too tired right now to reply to you all individually, sorry.

*sigh* had an absolutely fantastic time at church, both this morning and this evening, but... well, I'm beginning to feel a bit invisible every time Tom's at home and we don't have people over, because he always seems to just ignore me and play on his 360 unless I ask if I can have a go. Like tonight, we got back from church about 5 minutes ago, and yes, we were at church together but we didn't exactly talk to each other there, because we were talking to everyone else, but as soon as he got home, even before I'd gotten my jacket and shoes off, he was on the 360. *sigh* I just want him to, you know, acknowledge my presence sometimes or something. Or is that too much to ask?

realflifefaerie 18-01-2009 09:51 PM

*hugs snuffles* Glad your taking positive steps to try to avoid relapsing, I hope your counsellor helps.

*cuddles Mamma Mia gently* take your time asking for help, you'll find the strength. I agree the weather was awful last night.

*hugs Zowie* I agree with Kat friends like that aren't friends, they aren't worth cutting for though hun.

*hugs Mamma Mia* Sundays were made for doing housework in jamas, and I would have hidden too! My exams tuesday but thanks for remembering.

*hugs Auburn Shadow* churches in my experience are either lovely and friendly like that or cliquey, Im glad you enjoyed yourself. It isnt unfair to ask to be recognised, try talking to him?

I've had a hellish 24 hours, am now stupidly triggered...I don't want to eat either and Im exhausted but cant sleep...I just want a hug from the boyfriend and to hide under a duvet for a while.

Eclectica 18-01-2009 10:15 PM

*Hugs secrets*

My newest scars are triggering me.

Eclectica 18-01-2009 11:24 PM

I wanna cut. But... I can't.

And I just said to mum "I'll be having a bath later" and she instantly froze and stared at me, asking "are you gonna be ok?" in THAT voice. URGH

wildly insane 19-01-2009 12:14 AM

I like Sundays, the way I can get out of bed at 11am and not have a panic attack because I've wasted half a day because that's what sundays are for. Have a deep dread about tomorrow though I don't know why. Job applications went well, didn't quite do as much interview prep as I was hoping for but did get a cycle ride in and the weather was lovely, didn't do well again on the whole food front - grr hate food, eat too much.

Hana - did you manage to get out for a walk? hope you sleep well tonight. *offers nice cup of herbal tea to help relax* hope Tom shows you a little attention, men just don't seem to get it sometimes.

*hugs MammaMia* take care hun, be kind to yourself.

*hugs Zowie* they're not worth your tears or anything else, stay strong show them you're better than them.

*Hugs Mary Anne* Sorry to hear about last night, we had random people being scary and ringing our doorbell last night as well, scared my housemate so much she nearly phoned the police. I think I slept through it. *gives tea and a cuddle to help make sunday a bit less of a downer*

*hugs Secrets* sorry to hear you had a bad day, hope tomorrow is better and you get some sleep, good luck revising - don't forget, step by step, little by little, you'll surprise yourself.

*hugs Katricia* good luck with your mum, be strong

*leaves a hug for Ravynsoul when she drops in* hope you're doing okay

*hugs Dayna and Snuffles* hope Sunday went okay good luck for Monday.

*Hannah feels safe here, just going to curl up in the corner and pretend that I don't have to get up tomorrow morning and deal with a monday, the weekend went by way too quickly*

MammaMia 19-01-2009 12:35 AM

*hugs everyone*

It's Monday again. I dislike mondays. I have to go see my lecturer today about my assignment and I just can't be bothered. I need my bed. I just can't be arsed with Mondays in general. But I have to go, I already missed this meeting once and can't yet again. I am so tired. I'ms truggling but keep going happy. Hmm. Met some great new people at the meet on Saturday who've helped quite a bit today. But I still miss people- I need my dad. I didn't quite have the guts today to ask him if he left because of me...but he'll only worry if I start going on about them splitting for a millionth time and start giving me the "I had no choice and would you rather I'd stayed and people argued and got hurt" stuff =\

ARGH.
I don't know what to do.
I don't want to ask for help.
But I need help.
=/


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