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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

misskitty112 20-09-2010 06:28 PM

*hugs Hels* what's going on, darlin?

MammaMia 20-09-2010 06:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doikers (Post 2497928)
*Hugs Helen* Whats happened?

Quote:

Originally Posted by misskitty112 (Post 2497929)
*hugs Hels* what's going on, darlin?

*hugs both* One of my hearing aids broke this morning at college =[

FlyingNy 20-09-2010 07:26 PM

Can't you get a new on on the NHS or something?

xx

Doikers 20-09-2010 07:39 PM

Oh that bites Helen , Can you hear sort of okay with just the one? How long do you think it will take to repair it , have they broken before on you?

FlyingNy 20-09-2010 07:41 PM

Some people are so strange. Someone begged me not to leave them and I promised I never would unless they wanted me to go. Now they've gone and left me, although they promised they would always be there. I can't even summon the energy to be that upset. I expected it all along. No one ever stays.

MammaMia 20-09-2010 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IceQueenHasAHeart (Post 2498036)
Can't you get a new on on the NHS or something?

xx

Hopefully =/ Mum's phoning for me tomorrow, to see if I can just walk in/or get an appointment. I can't go til Thursday.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doikers (Post 2498071)
Oh that bites Helen , Can you hear sort of okay with just the one? How long do you think it will take to repair it , have they broken before on you?

No, I really struggle. :crying: I cannot explain how distressing it is. I don't want to, I'll cry again lol. Hoping to have a new one when I go on Thursday or have one before I go away gaaaah >_< I rely on them so much.

life-hurts 20-09-2010 08:38 PM

self injury and self poisoning
 
Well yesterday I cut, and today I self poisoned.:pinch:

I'm scaring myself with my compulsion to hurt me. Today I wanted to carry out my plan to commit suicide even though I didn't want to die. That's just weird. Before when I've felt suicidal I've wanted to die.This is way more confusing and personally I also find it more upsetting.

I phoned the duty worker, I don't know why. What did I want from them exactly? I suppose I was scared and needed reassuring, but after chatting to them the compulsion to self poison got the better of me. :cry:

Anyway I'm seeing my CPN on Wednesday. Its a shame I don't trust her so don't think it will help too much:-(

My GP is away for the next two weeks, so all I know is I've got to keep busy and be careful.

I'm glad this forum exists, hopefully checking in on the ward will help me keep safe sometimes.
I hope you can be patient with me at the moment:crying:

Hugs to all that can accept them

Hannah

misskitty112 20-09-2010 08:39 PM

*hugs Hels* I hope you can get it replaced soon.
*hugs Lia* I'll stay around. =)

So... I'm okay, just tired and hungry, but I have a meeting soon so I have to wait to eat. Also, I miss my brother. I'm listening to tons of rap music since he likes a lot of it, and giggling cause of our craziness whilst listening to the music. I'm slightly pathetic, I know.

Doikers 20-09-2010 08:43 PM

*Hugs Hannah* I sorry You S.I.'ed , please try and stay safe until you can see somebody useful .We don't need to be patient with you , this thread exists just so we can talk and get empathy and advice from the other wardies :)

*Hugs the ward goodnight* I'm not really tired but I don't want to be tired tomorrow morning and I don't want to harm (again) tonight so off to bed I'm going .

FlyingNy 20-09-2010 10:07 PM

*Hugs Hannah* I'm sorry you're so low. I wish there was something I could do.

*Hugs Felicia.* Thanks. People say that though and then they do. It's not that I don't trust you, more than I don't trust myself.

*Hugs Mark* Night night.

*Hugs Helen* I hope you get it sorted soon.

Oh. Dear. Life. "I feel sorry for you" Someone actually just said that to me. I think horrified is just about the word to cover how I'm feeling right now. I don't want people's pity, not now, not ever. It's part of the reason I am shut off like I am, I DO NOT want people to see me as a victim. I'm not. Urgh. I just hate that so much. People's pity is the last thing I ever want. Lucky she lives 5 hours away, I don't think I could ever look her in the eye again...

The One Who 20-09-2010 10:19 PM

*hugs everyone who wants of needs them*

My good mood has disappeared. I'm not entirely sure why, maybe it just wasn't meant to be.

SparkleKitten 20-09-2010 10:33 PM

Had a rough day today :(

Just want to curl up in a ball and disappear now.

misskitty112 20-09-2010 11:15 PM

*hugs Lia* I understand that, so many people have left me. I know it's hard to believe.

*hugs Claire and Sarah* I hope you guys feel better soon.

I just want to sleep... forever. (And no, I mean nothing bad by it. I just want to go to sleep... seriously)

Kahlia1981 21-09-2010 05:30 AM

Ever just wanted to dissolve into tears and then disappear? *sigh*

Doikers 21-09-2010 10:18 AM

*Hugs Kahlia*

*Hugs Lia*

*Hugs Felicia*

*Hugs Sarah*

*Hugs Claire*

*Hugs everyone else*

Doikers 21-09-2010 10:52 AM

*Spots and hugs Julie* :) How are you Julie ?

xxjuliexx 21-09-2010 10:59 AM

*cuddles marky then scratches my arms* i am very itchy

Doikers 21-09-2010 11:05 AM

*Hugs Julie* Hmm why are you itchy? allergy maybe?

xxjuliexx 21-09-2010 11:17 AM

mhmm i think so just so itchy *scratches lots*

The One Who 21-09-2010 01:35 PM

I need a hug :(

Doikers 21-09-2010 01:44 PM

*HUGS Claire* Do you need to talk ?

The One Who 21-09-2010 01:46 PM

I honestly don't know. It's just like life has it in for me, I just never get a break from anything. I just want things to be okay, just for once. *hugs*

Doikers 21-09-2010 01:49 PM

It was my Sisters 28th yesterday , I can't beleive I have a 28 year old little sister . Thats the last family occaision before my 30th , up until now I've been focusing on my grannys birthday then my Grandma's then my sister's but now it's all focused on mine , I've been asked for my gift wish lish . I am SO freaked out about turning 30 , I don't want to , It's coming close to the date I set myself to kill myself, although my Dr put me on more Lithium when I mentioned this and I'm not so suicidal now I STILL have that date in my mind :S unhappy.........

The One Who 21-09-2010 01:54 PM

*hugs Mark* That does sound hard. I really don't have any words, I'm afraid.

Doikers 21-09-2010 02:08 PM

Thanks For The Hugs Claire . I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better too :S *Huggles*

Louise 21-09-2010 02:14 PM

*hugs everyone* then sits in the corner

Doikers 21-09-2010 02:14 PM

*Hugs Louise*

*Spots and Glomps April*

misskitty112 21-09-2010 02:39 PM

*hugs Mark*

I have no words today. This is lovely. I have counseling today and once again i'll go in and tell my counselor I can't find the words to say what I need too. ****.
And you know how busy I am? I still found time to go buy a tool and hide it in my room.... Somedays I hate myself.

Doikers 21-09-2010 02:41 PM

*Hugs Felicia* OOps I missed your above post :S sorry Felicia , don't hate yourself though , you don't deserve it

Louise 21-09-2010 02:52 PM

I hope the councilling goes ok. could you write what you have to. say down on paper then give it to your councillor

Feels low today :(

misskitty112 21-09-2010 03:12 PM

I'm sorry you feel low, Louise. *hugs*

I need to get up and get ready, but I don't want to. I don't want to face today. sigh. I suppose I have to though.

Doikers 21-09-2010 04:05 PM

Just a thought and sorry in advance if they have been in and I've not noticed but, Has Kat (Katnovia) been in recently ? Has anyone seen her about this thread or the site in general?

SoMuchMore 21-09-2010 04:26 PM

*hugs everyone* sorry i cant catch up right now.

but mark - she hasnt posted for almost a month now... hope she's safe

*hides in the corners where nobody has to see her*

Louise 21-09-2010 04:29 PM

I hope she is ok.

*hugs laura* sits in the corner with you. anything you want to talk about?

Doikers 21-09-2010 04:35 PM

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Louise*

MammaMia 21-09-2010 05:15 PM

*hugs ward*

CrazyHayley 21-09-2010 05:24 PM

I spy a Mark and Louise awake and active in the ward! *HUGGLES!!!*

*toddles all around, over and under ward to give all other wardies appropriate tlc they can accept*

blah....
mmm I'm hungry....
It's time to put ludwig away and get reggie out in 35minutes....

*sits pondering what to munch*

Doikers 21-09-2010 05:24 PM

*Hugs Helen* how are you going with/out your hearing aid? Did you get a new one perhaps?

Doikers 21-09-2010 05:25 PM

*Hugs Hayley* Hmmmm Houmous maybe? :P

CrazyHayley 21-09-2010 05:30 PM

oooh if only I had some hummous then that'd be a good idea, but I deliberately didn't buy any this week cos of, well ED issues :( stupid woman that i am. I will ask for help when Eoghan deploys, I'm 29, I need to get a grip, but I can't ask for help yet, brave face on and all that! I feel torn, i don't want him to go, but I want help...I guess if he wasn't going I'd get the help cos then I wouldn't be doing the brave face to protect him. Blah...

*goes to stare at food in cupbaords and contemplate*

Doikers 21-09-2010 05:47 PM

Quote:

I'm 29, I need to get a grip
I . Know . The . Feeling .

Please get the help when Eoghan is deployed , I understand why you are keeping your brave face on until then *Hugs Ya*

Louise 21-09-2010 05:55 PM

hugs hayley

MammaMia 21-09-2010 06:14 PM

*hugs everyone*

Mark, they've changed all appointment stuff again, so can't even go to my local hospital about it. Anyway, Mum's sorted an appointment out for me next Thursday. Been booked in as a service apparently. Well, that'll show them it's bloody broke!! Am praying so hard that I can have a new one on the day :'( Or even just a loan one (as it's the 'aid' that's broken, not my mould). Crying with frustration but least it's not a college day...

Talking of college :p We got told today in one of our classes that we have to do stuff infront of the class in two weeks time. However, as I'm not here, they've moved our group a week forward. So then my group get to sit & watch for all of that lesson just because of me :P Was quite pleased in a sad way about that :D

Oh & my bus pass, well the photo ID bit, still hasn't turned up. So I finally phoned today & they're sending out a new one. So that better be here by Thursday. Sick of paying out 3.50 on daysavers every day!!

Doikers 21-09-2010 06:23 PM

*Hugs Helen* At least they are in the process of 1)Fixing your hearing aid and 2)Getting your Bus pass :) Good luck standing up in front of the class , things like that petrify me .......

Doikers 21-09-2010 07:03 PM

Hmm I'm getting triggered :S I was picking at a wound just now but I just want to injure *Sigh* will it never be over ? Sorry.

The One Who 21-09-2010 07:06 PM

Has there been a specific thing that has triggered you?

Doikers 21-09-2010 07:14 PM

No Claire , I tend to get more triggered in the evening anyway , but I think just there being no other occaision between me and my 30th , I'm not ready to be 30 , I cannot cope , I should be a better human being by now , by 30 I SHould be married and HAPPY and I'm neither .

shadowedsoul 21-09-2010 07:14 PM

cuddles all. then curls up in the corner.

Doikers 21-09-2010 07:16 PM

*Hugs Jill* whats up Jill?

The One Who 21-09-2010 07:22 PM

Mark, really, you are human and a good one at that. There is no rule anywhere that says by thirty you need to have done x, y or z. I know it's not really the same, but I haven't done or had a lot of the things that 'normal' twenty-two year has.

What's up Jill?


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