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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

taz35 20-08-2010 05:29 PM

*hugs Mark*

*hugs Hels* Why so much pain? And if it's been kicking around for a little while, you should probably get it checked =/

*finds Nicole and Lindsay and Louise and gives them hugs*

*hugs April* Don't give up hun <3

Jaw is still swollen and sore, I look like a chipmunk. Probably just gonna lie in bed all day with ice packs. I'll try to pop in every now and then.

MammaMia 20-08-2010 05:31 PM

Taz, so much pain, I don't know why I have it, but only had since I woke up. Hurts in my side, near my ribcage, everytime I breathe in. *hugs back*

*hugs Nicole & Alex*

Doikers 20-08-2010 05:58 PM

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugse Helen* if you still have the pain tomorrow you should probably make a Drs appointment , sorry

*Hugs Lex*

*Hugs Taz* *Gives ice for your teeth*

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs April*

*Hugs Nicole*

MammaMia 20-08-2010 06:08 PM

Why you sorry Mark?

Doikers 20-08-2010 06:14 PM

I just felt I was Umm , stating the obvious .

I just feel the need to apologise a LOT , insecure I guess . I really want to say sorry now heh.

MammaMia 20-08-2010 06:46 PM

Oh okay....I might get an appointment on Monday if it's no better :) But it keeps going much better, than bit painful and then settles..

Scarletdreamer 20-08-2010 06:52 PM

:(

*hugs all the wardies, then curls up in the warren to cry softly*

Jarrod's supposed to call shortly on his break... and I don't really want to talk to him if he's gonna start in on me about my car, etc. *sigh* :( Feel like a complete & utter bitch for saying that, but... it's true.

I am also having a REALLY bad day when it comes to food. Have barely eaten at all which is probably contributing to the bitchiness. I don't know. I just... am in a hate-life mode right now. And I'm "allowed" to slip up every once in awhile, I know that... but maybe I'm "capitalizing" on that now? since I know that Jarrod won't be too pissed at me for slipping up, as long as it's not very frequently? I don't know. VERY FRUSTRATING. :'(

*hides again* :crying:

Doikers 20-08-2010 08:04 PM

*Hugs April* Sorry I can't find any inspirational comment , I'm struggling myself this evening :(

one_step_closer 20-08-2010 08:25 PM

*hugs everyone* I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling.

nicole94 20-08-2010 08:31 PM

*hugs everyone then hides*

Doikers 20-08-2010 08:43 PM

Taz!! I spots you *Hugs* How's your mouth now ?

taz35 20-08-2010 08:45 PM

*gently hugs Helen's side* Have you tried applying heat to it? I would definitely suggest seeing a doctor soon if the pain doesn't let up. That way at least you'd have one less thing to worry about!

*hugs Mark* Sorry to hear you're struggling. Don't worry about apologizing too much... although one of my friends does it all the time and drives me insane :P My mouth is still swollen and sore, but not as bad as earlier! Although my back pain has returned... =/ I've had it for over a week but I'm too stubborn to go to the clinic.

*hugs April* Try not to take advantage of being allowed to slip up. Yes, it cuts you some slack... but it's more just so that you don't feel as guilty if you do... is this making any sense? Probably not :/ Just keep fighting it as best as you can <33

*hugs Lindsay* How are you?

*hugs Nicole*

nicole94 20-08-2010 08:57 PM

*screams, cries and throws things.* i ****ing give up. ive had enough

one_step_closer 20-08-2010 08:58 PM

I'm feeling kind of low. My brother is moving out on Sunday so i'll be living on my own without any friends nearby either. I think it will just be an excuse for me to self harm and overdose more.

one_step_closer 20-08-2010 08:58 PM

*hugs Nicole* What's happening?

nicole94 20-08-2010 09:00 PM

*hugs lindsay* my friends making up **** about me and saying i said stuff when i ****ing didnt.

Louise 20-08-2010 09:02 PM

*cries*

Doikers 20-08-2010 09:11 PM

*Hugs Nicole*

*Hugs Lindsay* Try not to S.I. and OD more when you live alone , I live alone and I know that it can be a real struggle but it can be done . Sorry if that sounds patronising I didn't mean it to.

*Hugs Louise and hands over a tissue for the tears*

nicole94 20-08-2010 09:14 PM

*hugs mark.* i dont know what im doing.

Scarletdreamer 20-08-2010 09:15 PM

What's up, Louise, hon?? *cuddles*

Nicole, sweet, I'm sorry that your friend's doing that... :( Well, "friend," if you get what I mean. :( That really bites. I wish I could help you more... *huggles*

Mark, struggling with SI?? You haven't talked much about yourself lately. *cuddles* And it's okay, I have the same "sorry" thing that I do... it drives people close to me crazy. I only say "sorry" a lot when I'm dealing with sensitive topics... at least, I think, lol. But still, I understand the urge to say it. Heh.

Laura, Hels, how are you two? You've been pretty quiet lately. *hugs gently*

Taz, glad you're around the ward more, even if you're not feeling the best physically. Maybe you should go and see someone about your back?? *cuddles gently*

Lindsay, I hope that you manage to stay safe. Speaking of which, how are you doing today?? *gentle hugs*

Julie, Crimson, JK, Kahlia, Oliver, Kat, everyone I missed (so sorry - this is why I don't list out names!!!!), how are you all?? *big gentle bear hugs to each of you*

Doikers 20-08-2010 09:24 PM

Yes April , struggling with S.I. :( I just want it to be gone ! Getting mad urges and alcohol cravings too which are just mental but feel physical , make sense? Sorry for the whiney post..........

shadowedsoul 20-08-2010 09:44 PM

Cuddles all. Hmm I'm okay, I'm okay. Curls up and hides.

Scarletdreamer 20-08-2010 09:54 PM

Somehow, Jill, sweetie, I don't believe you. *cuddles gently* What's up??

Aww Mark, I'm sorry. :( I wish I could take away your urges... *cuddles gently* And yeh I understand the mental urges feeling physical thing. Sadly. I remember it all too well... SI does that too, haven't had it with alcohol as I've never drunk (literally). Anyway. (Am NOT saying I am better than you or anyone else who struggles with alcoholism or drug addiction or anything similar... just saying I've not experienced it.)

Blah. :(

nicole94 20-08-2010 09:58 PM

*sits*

Scarletdreamer 20-08-2010 10:03 PM

*hugs Nicole gently* How are you, love??

nicole94 20-08-2010 10:06 PM

*hugs april* im fed up. home alone and having a lot of OD thoughts :(

taz35 20-08-2010 10:58 PM

*hugs Nicole* Keep trying to fight off the thoughts. Is there someone you can call and talk to, or invite over to keep you company? Don't give up <3

*hugs Lindsay* I get what you mean... that really sucks :( Do you have things to do to keep yourself distracted? Or somebody you can call if the urges get really overwhelming?

*sits with Louise and offers tissues and a cuddly teddy bear*

*hugs Mark* :( I wish I could make your urges disappear...

*finds Jill and gives her a big hug* Anything on your mind?

*hugs April* I know I should... I think I'm going to give it a few more days, and then finally give in. I still have the painkillers from my surgery, so I'm using those partly for my mouth and partly for my back... but once they run out, I don't think I'll be able to ignore the pain any longer.

Sorry all, I've been whining a lot about my mouth lately. I'll shut up now.

(On the positive side... I bought a new chair for my room, spent about an hour trying to assemble it. Will post pictures tomorrow)

*leaves care packages everywhere*

nicole94 20-08-2010 11:08 PM

*hugs taz* im home alone and everyones too far away and its too late anyways :( im trying to stay distracted

shadowedsoul 20-08-2010 11:10 PM

Huggles all.April, taz it's being a stressful day, and I'm kind of gearing myself up for an even stressful day tommorow. Feeling low but trying to put on a brave face, got really stuiped thoughts going round my head. Really want to act on them. Even if I wanted to cut I can't as I'm going to sharing my room with someone. Really want to hide and cry until I can't.

April was I that obvice I wasn't okay.

MammaMia 20-08-2010 11:26 PM

*cuddles everyone lots* Sorry we're all struggling so much.

Today's been, how can I put it, difficult. Well majority of it was, however, I don't want to go into why, because one of those things that need to stay between me & the other person involved. Don't think I'm being rude :)

The pain's much much better, still there slightly. But it's cope-able. Going to an RYL meet tomorrow, haven't been to one since late March or whenever it was, when I met a fellow warder, Oliver :D

shadowedsoul 20-08-2010 11:44 PM

Cuddles everbody. Erm tomorrow going to be fantastic. (note the sarcasm) 5 very stressed out people I'm going to be very surprised if someone doesn't end up knocking someone head off, they will be that stressed. Then got to keep my cool and not kill a certen person, damn that's going to be tough. this stressful day won't be finished untill about 2am. Just want to curl up and hide.Damn it I really want to hurt myself. =(

nicole94 20-08-2010 11:45 PM

*huggles helen*

MammaMia 20-08-2010 11:48 PM

*cuddles Nicole and Crimson*

taz35 21-08-2010 12:41 AM

*hugs Nicole* Sorry to hear hun :( <3 Stay safe.

*hugs Jill* Ahhh... well, it's not necessarily a bad thing that you have somebody around then, if it stops you from SI! What's so stressful about tomorrow? (if you feel like talking)

*hugs Hels* I've yet to go to one :( Not many Canadians on here unfortunately. Enjoy yourself and take lots of pictures! :D

*spots April & tackles her*

MammaMia 21-08-2010 12:58 AM

*hugs Taz* Hope you get to go to one someday :D

Detour. Derail 21-08-2010 04:12 AM

*comes out of hiding*
Sorry I have no indivual replies...Im abit...confused...
The doorman at work asked me if I was "alright" tonight and when I said yeah why he replied "well...you were really....down last week...and this week...your so...hyped its like your...I dont know"
I had to just walk away...

Kahlia1981 21-08-2010 04:52 AM

*huggles everybody*

Wasted most of today sleeping which means I have to take my script to a different chemist 'cause mine is closed. :-( Oh well. At least we have voted already ....

Taz: I was very lucky when they did my wisdoms they did the four at once under full anaesthetic and the only real problem was that the "forgot" I'm allergic to latex and tried to wheel me in half-way through the day instead of first - like I was supposed to be. Then they had to wheel me back to the prepping area and I had to wait for everyone else to be done, and for them to latex-clean the theatre and I got wheeled in again! The Dr who did the operation was reading a newspaper as I was wheeled in, which was kind of calming believe it or not - I realised that he'd done so many of these he knew exactly what he was doing. I don't really remember it but apparantly I woke up crying for my mother - which is a normal reaction for a girl the age I was at the time. Guys my age (at the time) usually wake up swinging! Anyway, this long ramble full on absolutely non-interesting facts was meant to say that I hope the pain doesn't take too much longer to start to settle and that I can relate to some of what you are going through. Hang in there sweetheart.

Seriously sorry for the lack of individual replies ... I've just totally lost that plot for a bit. I'll try and catch it again when I can.

*big hugs to all*

risenfromperdition 21-08-2010 05:28 AM

*cuddles everyone then sits in corner and sighs*
i ate so bloody much today and had pizza for dinner :(
this why i wanna get up late... then cant eat >.>
and now i gotta get offline even though i cant sleep and its not FAIR :\

hope you all has a good day <3 love you guysss

MammaMia 21-08-2010 06:20 AM

I'm so tired >_< Charlie (my sister's dog) woke me up about 4.50am. It's now 6.20am. Clearly I can't be back to sleep. GRRRR!!! I may just stay awake now..we'll see :/

*cuddles everyone*

SoMuchMore 21-08-2010 06:25 AM

*hugs helen* sorry you were woken up.. its so annoying when you can't get back to sleep.

*hugs everyone* sorry there have been quite a few pages since i last posted, will try to catch up later.

I am sick... of course.. i would get sick right before uni restarts. Its just a bad cold, but still. Have to try to get some sleep soon though, have to be up and out by 8am.. (its 12:25am here now)

MammaMia 21-08-2010 06:27 AM

Bad colds suck :( *cuddles Laura* Hope you get to sleep soon.

shadowedsoul 21-08-2010 07:58 AM

Huggles all.sorry taz I wasn't ignoring you, just had alot going on last night. Fire alarms constantly going off. Then police cars sirens going off. Albthis as we are trying to sleep. Hmm let the caose(sp?) begin. Might need to curl up here for a while at some point today. Might not make sence tho, kinda out of it at the sec.

Doikers 21-08-2010 10:42 AM

*Hugs Nicole*

*Hugs Laura* *Hands over cold medicine*

*Hugs Jill*

*Hugs Helen* Have fun at your meet :) Sorry that your sisters dog woke you grr

*Hugs April*

*Hugs Heather*

*Hugs Kahlia*

*Hugs Lex*

*Hugs Everyone else I forgot , Sorry*

nicole94 21-08-2010 11:25 AM

*hugs everyone*

Kahlia1981 21-08-2010 12:26 PM

*huggles all*

Elections today and I'm hoping like hell I'm not going to have to practice saying:
"Don't blame me. I didn't vote for the bigot!"

Doikers 21-08-2010 12:39 PM

Good luck the non-bigot , Is that the Man or the Woman? I breifly saw a news article about the Australian Elections whilst I Had the news channel on looking for the weather forcast but I don't know much about it exept the man doesn't believe in man made global warming , sheesh , but I'm not very well informed .

Scarletdreamer 21-08-2010 12:51 PM

*cuddles all & gets tackled by Taz* ;)

Hels, love, so sorry you got woken up so early... I got up at 5:20am but that was just 'cause I woke up then, not because I got woken up. *sigh* :( We're BOTH gonna be exhausted later today, which bites. However, that's not unusual for me. :-/ Anyway, sorry to go off about myself... how otherwise are you doing? feeling any better?

Mark, how're you doing, love??

Kahlia, how are you?

Jill, to answer your earlier question, to me, yes it was obvious that you weren't okay. *gentle hugs* I'm sorry it wasn't a restful night for you.

Taz, there aren't all that many Americans on here either - at least, in a close enough area to have a meet!! I'd love to meet the wardies here though... maybe someday, heh. How are you doing?

Nicole, sweet, how are you doing??

Laura, I'm sorry that you've got a bad cold, that sucks. Especially with uni restarting shortly. :( I wish I could snap my fingers & make you feel better. GRRRR. :(

As for me... I'm enjoying this "hungry feeling" in my stomach... which I know means I NEED to eat... but I'm just liking it. Is that bad? (answer: derp yes) I guess I definitely slip into the anorexic mindset wayyy too easily, especially when super stressed. At least I get to see my bestie today... although for how long I really don't know. :( She's such a flake, or can be... and is gonna be moving away soon... and... I'm going to miss her like hell. :'(

Anyway. Enough about me...

Kahlia1981 21-08-2010 01:27 PM

Mark: The bigot is the man. There's a lot of things he doesn't believe in and one of them is people with mental illness being allowed in society and being allowed to reproduce ... Not to mention he most likely would bring back "Work Choices" which had this nice little policy in it that got rid of all unfair dismissal laws. So if a boss didn't like the look of you they could sack you and you had no legal recourse ...

April: Yeah, I'm ... okay I guess. To be honest, I really don't know. I asked my housemate for a knife earlier and when he asked why I explained it was to cut all the damaged tissue from my knee. (I probably should explain that I had a nasty fall up at the hospital on Friday and am sporting injuries to my L ankle, knee and elbow and my R knee as well as my palms.) I know what you mean about slipping into the anorexic mindset by the way. I've been doing it alot lately and have been mostly lucky that my housemate hasn't caught me out or has been thinking I'm joking when he has caught me out. I'm sorry your bestie is moving away ... I know that it'll hurt, but maybe somehow you'll find a way to view it in a positive light - like maybe giving you somewhere to go for a holiday? I don't know, just thinking with my fingers.

April,Hels: Maybe we should call ourselves the early morning group. :-( I woke up at 03:30 this morning and can't work out why. We'd had a friend over and sat downstairs with her until we needed bed at 23:00, so I didn't get much sleep. Now I'm sitting here at about 22:20 and I couldn't sleep so I got up! I really hope you guys aren't/weren't (sorry not sure with time zones) too tired, and managed a decent and full nights sleep the following night. Sorry, getting my tenses all wrong but I think you can work out what I mean.

*leaves cuddles and safe love and care packages for all*

Scarletdreamer 21-08-2010 01:33 PM

*cuddles Kahlia* It's 8:30am where I am, I think 1:30pm where Hels is. I know, timezones get so damn confusing!!! And I'm sorry that you understand what I mean about the anorexic mindset, although at the same time I am glad - I'm sure you understand what I mean by that. :( I really ought to go and eat something, even if it's small, because I also haven't had my Abilify yet this morning... but I'm only taking 10mg now and honestly, I really don't want to take it.

The following content has been hidden - Reason : may be ED trig
Oh, and I've been losing a "lot" of weight lately. People have even noticed. ^_^ I think it's mostly water weight since I tend to retain water and don't drink a lot usually, but still, it makes me happy to stand on the scale. I think that's another reason that I have been enjoying this hungry feeling. :-/ I'm really glad that I'm losing weight though, because I'd gotten to an all-time high (and with my ups & downs, it's really scary to see that high a weight, ever...). Eh. Who knows.


Anyway. Ummm... I think I'm gonna update my LJ now... so I can get all of what I want to say... verbal vomit & all... onto the screen without it taking up so much room here. >_<

*cuddles all*

Kahlia1981 21-08-2010 01:44 PM

Yeah April - I think it's only people who've been there who really can get it. And believe me, I do understand. It's good to know you aren't alone, but at the same time I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Well, as well as all the other stuff. Just one thing before I go - Remember that there can be a lot of reasons for weight to go up and the body can make changes of up to 5 kgs (sorry my brains too tired to change that to pounds) in a day due to all sorts of things like timing, digestion, fluid, etc. *cuddles*

*cuddles all*


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