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-   -   Could use someone support sorry to ask struggling? (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=256131)

levithanh0209 11-07-2019 10:08 AM

Could use someone support sorry to ask struggling?
I'm really not sure if this is the right board feel free to move if not. Things have gotten rough again. I was well enough to go home Saturday. I tried to be calm but the police had busted ym door I got really worked up, it's still unsafe. I've been crying so much. I've seen the CT over the weekend and I've been trying to talk to them and not overdose on the same thing I did and more. I feel like I wanan be dead and it will happen. I self harmed last night. The CT took pills of me. I had to get a 1 day emergency script from been so dumb and get the self harm looked at. It's so hard to talk and not just act. I find that I'm upset not by just one thing but a lot of things. I feel a really bad friend as M is the hopsital I felt guilt not been able to visit and I'm worried for her health. I feel selfish for thinking everyone would be better of without me. I can't get over the letting my son down. I find August another hard time becUse the 13th is the date he was taken and it's so rare still and my birthday a week after :(. I'm so confused and upset. My sleep is bad. I feel like everyone is fed up with me and would prefer it if I just got on with killing myself. I'm trying to listen and fight that and reach out.

I don't know what I'm asking for with this but I just feel so alone ..

tamobhuuta 11-07-2019 11:42 AM

No advice but i care.

one_step_closer 11-07-2019 04:28 PM

I'm sorry things are so difficult for you right now. I know that it's hard once you're in a crisis point to stop reacting in 'extreme' ways and try and let things calm down. Is there someone you trust who you can talk to about all of the things that are upsetting you at the moment? Someone closer to you or someone who knows you better than the crisis team? I hope things ease for you soon.

Stellata 11-07-2019 07:30 PM

Well done for reaching out here.

BeddieC 12-07-2019 09:27 AM

Are you able to be open with the CT? I think reaching out here is a good step & shows you want some help to not go to the harmful behaviours

Koala hugs 18-08-2019 08:33 PM

Hi I hope things are starting to improve for u now. It sounds like a lot to deal with. Take care hugs

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