I dunno if I'm coping or just bottling it up... Scared I'm bottling it up... Bad things happen when I do...

I've been pushing current events away from me but now need to come full circle and allow myself to feel. Here I can be safe and let both my feelings and my inners show. And yet, I can't. Right now I'm just going to curl up in the corner with my blankets and pillows and allow the tears to fall.

Depression is almost physically painful. I can't actually feel anything, but I can barely function for the need to curl up wimpering on the floor or hunch up gasping as though I've been stabbed. I'd give anything to be able to cry right now.

And I'd give anything to know how I felt on this day. Because now I'm here, I don't know what to do. I'm all alone, and the only blood on my carpet is real.

my gf lost or misplaced her necklace. im about to implode my brain out of sadness. ;;(

found it!!!!!! :D:D

is the wardies doing ok?

Haven't been here for a few years. Hope I'm still welcome.

*grabs duvet curls up in corner*

Everything is spinning out of control... all sorts of urges I've not felt like this for a while...

Feeling safer here *whimpers*

Housemate had a bad night and locked himself out, came home a little while ago, snapped at me, and ...hurt... himself after I went upstairs. We've just had a long chat and I've cleaned him up, but I don't know what to do now?

Just got back from another two week stint in hospital. Now I just want to curl up into a tight ball and cry myself to sleep.

*curls up in the corner with my teddy bear*

'checks in and hides' hope I'm still welcome, haven't been here for a couple of years.

don't feel safe. can't. stop. thinking about cutting.

'hides under blanket'. :crying: :crying: :crying:

silentgirl: You are always welcome here. *offers safe hugs*

Really not going well at the moment. Seriously suicidal and very depressed. Thinking I'm going to have to head back to hospital or that my husband is going to admit me to the public hospital here... really not good.

*curling up in a corner with my teddy bear and some pillows*

'hugs you'

sorry not good with advice ATM.

really really bad urges but is scared of letting my parents down :(

silentgirl: Thanks for the hugs. *hugs back*

My husband and I ended up being awake all night because of my suicide plans and self harm urges. The only way I made it through the night was by distracting myself as much as possible and taking sedatives. My urges aren't settling down.

*curls up in the corner crying*

*hugs Kahlia*
*hugs silentgirl*

Mind if I join you two in here? Really not doing well right now at all :(

Maybe we could make a fort and have goodies?

Mat: A fort sounds great. *huggles*

I don't know how much more I can take. Every day I become more suicidal and less able to hide it. Now I don't even know if I can be bothered to hide what's going on. Maybe I'd be better off once it all is over. *sigh*

this is not to make anything harder on all you cutters like i am too. but. if you walk into a room with no errors you yourself have to be free of errors but how can you do that if you are a castle of glass. first free your mind of errors drink a glass of water, let yourself rest. sleeping is not a sin. you need it more than anything else to be able to do anything else. i cant start to remember how much sleep i used when i was comitted when i was 15 that year. full of cuts and bruises started to loose friends cause they got too hysterical about it. atleast you people are in here because you actually try.. they didnt.. im proud how much you actually stick together in this. dont try to hurt yourselves cause you try to be. dont die and love will find you.

My head is so screwed right now.
I can't stop thinking about the urges.

I feel empty numb *curls up * my brain won't stop ... Please make it stop..

*crawls into a corner and tries to disappear*

I can't take being me any more. I have to let one of my alters out to take control for awhile... Maybe they can be happy.