*Hugs ward*

*good night hugs to all*

I haven't been here in a while sorry about that but here is an update.

The last two weeks have been horrid my eating issues got really bad and I fell into my depression again and was having suicidal thoughts [I was having to deal with a lot of drama at home and things were just bad all around]. I did end up self harming quite a bit but thankfully the last three days I have been feeling much better. My eating issues are still a problem but that is fine for now and I am just feeling much happier lately. I have a wonderful friend who helped me through and listened to me be all depressing but her just listening really helped me out. She was very supportive and I really appreciate that she was there for me. So anywho things are better and I am much more in control now also things at home have calmed down quite a bit so that defiantly helps.

End of Update

*hugs ward*

@ Atomicx xRocket: good friends are so important. I'm glad that you are better now.

Hey everyone.

*Hugs Atomic Rocket if Okay?*

*Hugs Laura*

*hugs Lindsay*

*hugs Lindsay*
*hugs Mark*

How is everyone today?

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Lindsay*

Make it stop :(

*cries* I am so tired of the family drama, the work stuff. My family always leaves me alone damn it. I am like thisclose to going off. Its annoying to be caught between a rock and q hard place... made to suffer and not be able to do anything about it

*Hugs Matt*

*huge hugs for everyone*

*Hugs Lindsay* How are you hun?

*Hugs Matt*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Mark* How you doing Mark?

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Ian*

How is everyone?
I'm pretty low :(

I'm sorry your feeling low Mark. Do you know whats causing you to feel that way? I could be better. I'm fed up. I'm having a lot of hassle with this back to work programme thing i have to attend through the jobcentre. The staff treat you crap and are horrible. They dont care. It all started because i turned up before i was meant to. I'm meant to go at 1.00pm until 3.30pm but i was there from 11.00 am until 2.00pm.

She had a go at me and asked why i was early i said i was bored and needed someone to talk to which was why i came early to see my friend who also goes there. She said i needed to go at the correct time so i do now but they still have a go at me and treat me like crap. I'v made complaints but they just make excuses and talk round it. I ended up hurting my hand last night because it gets me down being at the horrible place. I just think its far to much to be job searching for two and a half hours!

Oh Ian I'm So sorry they are treating you so awfully *Huggles*

*hugs all* how are you?

I feel like I have to kill myself. There is no other way that I can cope with all of the pain i'm feeling. My psychologist told me that if I start planning my suicide I need to call someone but there's no one who cares or takes me seriously since I have been diagnosed with BPD.

How is everyone else?

Could you call your psychologist? It seems like he is taking you seriously. Do you still see him/her?

I feel like cutting again. But I have been free for almost 3 months. I never thought I'd make it that long without SH.

Do you know what's making you feel like cutting, you're really well. I believe that you can get through this.

I'm not very good at making phone calls, i'm allowed to email my psychologist but not to say that i'm suicidal.